Therapy?
 

Okay. So firstly I just want to say sorry because I can see this post turning into one big mess so just stick with me.

I am a very private person. Hard to stress just how private. I have a hard time talking about myself -none of my friends know that I have ever had a problem with s/h, or about any family problems I may have or anything, really.

The following content has been hidden - Reason : family problems:

father alcoholic domestic abuse when drunk

Now, I have managed to stop cutting for well, about a year now and although every now and then I think about it I can't see myself going back to it. And even while I did it I would never have thought of asking for help.

The following content has been hidden - Reason : It's not very nice. SI related.

One of the last times I hurt myself I ended up with two open wounds that stayed open for over a week. They severely needed stitches but I didn't ever consider that an option.

And even last year when I was very unhealthy and lost alot of weight I didn't say anything and I kept it hidden. As always.

Now because I'm going to 18 soon I've been thinking about maybe getting help. 18 because I will legally be an adult and there is no chance of my parents being told by my gp or anything. (Right? I live in the uk, so if this is wrong please let me know.) But I don't really know what type of help I would even be able to help. I can't see therapy as an option because honestly now lol, can you? And medication? I don't really think that medication would help in anyway. And apart from these two really, are there any other ways that I could get help? And if no there is no other ways that help could be offered then really what would highlighting myself as being at any risk (of discovery from family/friends) through the gp?

I'm just a bit lost atm. The more I think about it the more I would like to just be normal and okay and the more I think about it the more it seems like less of a good idea to put myself out there like that.

ahh. this turned out a lot longer than expected! but thanks if you read it all lol.

For a start, even though u r under 18, your GP CANNOT tell your parents anything. The only occasion where they can, and this applies TO OVER 18s as well, is if they believe you are a real danger to yourself or others. And that doesn't just mean the odd cut here and there, you'd have to be at the point where they thought your life was in real danger. I hav turned up on my GPs doorstep requiring bandages having completely slashed myself and they haven't told my parents. It honestly is really really unlikely unless the circumstances are extreme. Sure, they'll encourage you to tell them- Ive had that a lot, but they're not going to if you refuse. It breaks confidentiality, which you have regardless of your age.

In answer to your question about seeing a different GP- I assume your local health centre has more than one doctor? In which case all you need do is ask to see a different one. You do not have to see your family GP thats reigstered as your doctor. When I first went to the GP, I knew I wanted to see a woman, but my families GP is a man. So I just rang them and said " can I make an appointment with a female doctor please?" Within the practise with which you are registered ( which will be the one with yr family doctor) you should be able to see any of the doctors. If however this isn't possible, you can use NHS website to find another practise nearby you, and then its just a question of going in and asking to register with them. You can only be registered at one doctors, but they should explain it all and help you.

In terms of your relatives working in hospitals- my aunt is a GP and I live in a rural area. Her GP practise is a sister practise of my doctors. It doesnt make any difference because everything is confidential!!

I know you say that you are a very private person. I am also a very private person and I find it incredibly difficult to talk about my problems. Only my best friend really knows about anythg. Its taken 2 years of therapy and I still haven't been able to open up about my past. But the social worker I see and the GP I see are both used to it. They know that and so they take it at my pace and don't force me to speak about anythg I can't. They also employ techniques which they're trained in to help me to open up to them. I never ever thought I'd be able to even talk to them, but I've proved myself wrong, I have and I am. It takes a long time for me to be able to trust people, so just building a relationship has taken mny months of small talking about how the week has been/ what I've been up to etc but as each session goes by it becomes easier. You'll never know until you try! You've spoken very openly to us about your problems above, could you print that email and take it with you? The thing is, you're nearly 18 now. You have your whole life ahead of you! It really honestly is better to tackle this now, because the longer you let it go on, the longer its going to continue to ruin your life and you deserve more than that! For me, I know that Ive got to keep trying and working towards opening up because I have ambitions- I want to go to uni, I want to become a doctor, have a family etc etc,. but the longer I stay how I am, all of those things I want to do with my life are going to suffer. Until I've been through this process, however painful, Im not going to get anythg out of life. Am I making sense?

This is a brilliant opportunity for you to move your life forward so you can live it to the full. Going to the GP is definately a good first step. They will will able to talk through all the options- medication, various therapy, other stuff and you can find out a bit more and talk about your concerns, which will allow you to make an informed decision about what help, if any, you want. Just please dont be to quick to rule out any offers of counselling/ psychotherapy etc. Because at the end of the day, if you go for a couple of sessions and its terrible, you can say ok, Ive tried it and it didnt work me so I'll leave it there but if you dont it could be the best decision you'd ever have made and you'll never know! I'd also encourage you to read through the thread I started under the mental health support section entitled Docs/hospitals/therapists etc. People there have been sharing their positive experiences and tips for going to GP and such like and it may help build your confidence if u read them- they're really good.

Please try and see a doctor!
ALso feel free 2 PM me if u wana ask anthg.
Love Becky xxx

therapist
 

i started seeing a christian therapist eighteen months ago. he is not a bible basher. he is so supportive. i keep a journal and we go through in our sessions and that really helps seeing him. i have made incredible progress sinnce i have being seeing him. i have come from a background of being abused and self harming. i only wish i made the step of going to see some one years ago. he has helped me so much.:thumbup: