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CagedBird 10-01-2011 11:55 PM

screaming
 
**** me I feel bad.

Life is really shitty right now. Not coping massively, I'm aiming for wednesday. Please if you read this pray time will fast forward through tuesday because I don't want it to happen.

Pain has escalated and need someone to hear my screams tonight.

bye

Pomegranate 11-01-2011 03:32 AM

I hear that you are struggling hun. I think aiming for Wednesday is a great idea though. What is happening tomorrow that is making you feel so stressed out?

Laura2.0 11-01-2011 02:24 PM

How was today?
I don't know what happened today, but I hope it went well.

CagedBird 11-01-2011 09:48 PM

I got through it.

Just feel ****. And alone.

Merc 15-01-2011 01:37 AM

wan to talk about it?
glad you go t thru it, sorry you feel so alone. can relate to that.
xxx

CagedBird 15-01-2011 02:03 AM

Thank you for noticing me. Yet again.

I think I'm too scared to talk about it properly because it hurts so badly inside. As i'm not really able to talk about it my SH has increased though. Can I just write again how much pain i'm in? The topic is too triggering for me to write down in words so i know it is hard for ppl to reply to me....but the pain is quite overwhelming. I'll sleep through the weekend if possible.

Laura2.0 15-01-2011 08:08 PM

I know what you mean with the pain being too much to talk about something. It's the same for me.
My way to deal with that is SH, so can't give you any advice on it.
I figured that I will eventually talk when I'm in a really safe environment and when I found someone I can trust.

Why sleep through the weekend?

Merc 15-01-2011 11:05 PM

You're worth noticing :o).
Just wondering how you are today/tonight? Hoping you are sleeping peacefully.
Does your T know any of it? I can understand how difficult it is to talk of some things. I was going to suggest writing it down for her...but doesn't sound like that would be any easier.
Thinking of you
xx

CagedBird 16-01-2011 02:06 PM

Sleeping means I don't have to think...it cuts down the hours I have to get through.

I'm doing okay, i didn't actually realise I could sleep for as long as I have. I must be tired. Yeh my T does know what is going on but I'm thinking of writing a letter to suggest I take a break from therapy for a while. With everything that is happening I just want to withdraw into myself and numb.

CagedBird 21-01-2011 10:34 PM

pointless post....

is feeling scared part of depression?


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