Will it ever end?
 

Nine months ago my current boyfriend asked me out. Ten months ago I found out he was a cutter. They day we started dating he promised me he'd stop. He swore he wouldn't do it again because that's how much he loved me. He's kept his promise. Two months ago he found out I was a cutter. He was very unhappy with me but more so he was scared for me and was there for me. I told him I'd stop and I did for about a month. Now it's all happening again, it's almost every night. I can't tell him because I don't want to break him but I can't stop. I can't tell him Ive been suicidal; looking for ways to kill myself everywhere I go. I can't hurt him like that.

you'll hurt him more if something happens and he didn't know about it....

can you talk to a councelor about whats going on?

and yes, things can definately turn around and get better, but that won't happen on its own, and its going to take alot of effort and sticking to it.

having a list of distractions on hand for when you get triggered is helpful. as is having someone to call, and your boyfriend may not be the best option. thats not anything bad about him. just might be better to have an adult or someone that is more stable.

This guy's gonna be hurt more if you don't tell him than if you do. He just wants to help.

Katie's right.

I know what you mean but I'm just afraid of how he'll handle it. He's had a very hard time with his parents lately (lot's of crap going on there) so I'm the one that's always cheering him up and making him happy.

You need to be honest with him or you will lose him. He graced you with the truth, it's only fair that you are honest back, no matter how tough that will be. You risk losing him by telling him what's going on but at least he would have some dignity left.

Thanks guys :) I talked with him and were settling some things now.