why am i so f*cked up
 

why would anyone care
no matter what i still feel pain
all the memories of them
everytime int he end i all ways get hurt
i cant satnd this **** any more
no one should care about me
no one should love me
im not worth anything
what is the use any more
im the bigest failure ever
i cant stand others hurting me
im so clse of being free
im good at hiding thing from others
i dont understand why so many people care about me
i remember all the hurt that happened to me in the past
now it feels so real all over again
i can feel those guys all over me
i dont no what to do any more
every day i thin about cutting myself
every nite i dream about cutting myself
im so ****ed up
what wrong with me
imside i feel so dead
am i alive or am i dead
i dont no what to think any ore
i dont no what to feel any more
the only thing i do no is that im a mistake
i should of went all the way and did it
no one should of found me
no one would even remember me
why do so many people hate me
mayeb she is right i am a whore
no body needs to no how much pain im in
hiding everything under baggy clothes
so no one can see me
i take one cut after another and another
no one would ever care if i ever stop cutting
i am all ways in the background
i get hurt at school
i get hurt at home
for now awn i will just keep hurting myself
i get yelled at for cutting myself
i cant stand them hurting me any more
so i do it myself
no one should even love me
no one should even care about me
i HATE myself for everything others do
and i just HATE myself for being me
i should not be alive any more
there is no point for me to live any more
besides to get hurt by others
everyone all ways leaves me in the end
i cant trust anyone any more
i am all alone like i all ways should have been

*Hugs*

There is so much pain, turmoil and suffering in your poem.

i feel al this pain ever day and nothing will ever take that away.im all ways hiding everything about me so no one can see who the real me is.

last week one of my freinds from school came up to me and asked my why i wear sweaters on hot day i did not answer her cuz i did not want her to think im a freak but one day she will find out just not yet.i dont want to lose another friend from me cutting up all the time. Amber does no some of the things that happen at home but she dont no everything yet.