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My Support.
I have a wonderful boyfriend, and he's really helping me with all my issues (of which I have many), and he's autistic (Aspergers, to be precise) so he's not the most emotionally aware. I love him very much and he's wonderful. ^_^
He says if I ever feel really low, or really angry, or anything not good to feel, I should call him and tell him about it. I do feel like I shouldn't burden him. I have this thing where I find it hard to talk about my problems and feelings, and it's so much harder to burden them to him, and make him said, because I love him so much and could just deal with them alone... I hate to make him sad... But maybe I can't do this alone, and I definately shouldn't. Should I unload all unto him? (Unto? WTF? That's what I get for thinking about unloading burdens unto Jesus, as the song goes.) I don't know. I have religion, and I pray about these things, but as much as I tell God in my prayers, he isn't a solid being; he can't give me a hug, and I'm no prophet; he doesn't speak to me in words. My boyfriend said a wonderful thing when I admitted my latest cut (only the second incident in a two year relationship, if you don't count our break, and you might not count the other incident because of my intense drinking at that party...) he said "it's okay to feel like this." I know it's okay to feel like this, but is it okay to burden him with all of it? |
No. I think there is only so much you can tell people before its starts to get a burden on them. I think its ok to tell people how you are feeling but not to rely on them so much. I think you need to get profssional support and maybe get him to engourage you and help support you through that.
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Hi, I think there's a fine line between 'burdening' someone and communicating within a relationship.If he is the only person you speak to about it and you just come out with everything all at once then yes he might find that hard to deal with, however you need to be honest with him to a certain extent as well, especially with Aspergers, as the lack of emotional awareness could make him very confused about your actions at times. Do you have counselling or anyone professional to talk to as wellas him?
A good rule of thumb I guess is try and answer your bf's questions on the matter as honestly as possible, that way he has a good ground knowledge of where you are at. And as I said communication is the key - you need to be able to talk to him, but Ithink you also need to tell him that it is ok for him to tell you if he feels overwhelmed by it all (and for you to not take it personally if he does say that). |
thanks lisbeth, thats really good advice =] yeah i only really speak to him, but im going to a doctor i think on friday, hes coming with me.
ill bear all that in mind. =D thank you, i do feel better now XD |
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