partial program
 

This summer I am doing a partial program and the local hospital. Today I signed a consent form starting the ball rolling on getting into the program. For some reason it's got me very triggered tonight. That and I jammed my finger really badly tonight. I'm nervous about the program and I think most of that is the fact that I am afraid to stop cutting..... I know stupid right? I mean shouldn't I be glad that this should help me stop? I just don't know anymore. I've only cut once in the past month and a half. Shouldn't I feel happy about that? I don't..... Lately little things have been triggering me yet I can read a book about cutting with no problem.( The book is titled Willow.... very good book so far) anyway. Am I just that messed up? I'm also afraid they'll make me talk about the molestation... I;m not sure I can talk about it yet even though it happened ages ago.....:notsure: