Where is the point in drinking alcohol and getting drunk?
 

I didn't post this thread in the Substance Abuse Forum because the things I want to know don't go behind Alcohol Abuse, it's just about the consumption in general...

So... I've never been a person who really liked drinking alcohol and getting drunk. The first times I drank alcohol was when I was about 15, all my friends already had years and years of experiences although they all were pretty much the same age like me.
I'm usually the sober one and carries all the drunk back home...

Since I've been here (Working Holidays in NZ), I realised how "strange"(?) my behaviour must be... I live in a backpackers which is run by locals, my boyfriend is a kiwi and there are a lot of other people and they all get drunk quite often.
It's usually every weekend even if we have work the next day, they just don't care. This weekend (or shall I say this week) was just too much for me: they've been drinking since Thursday and there hasn't been one day without beer or bourbon or any other alcohol.
Everyone keeps convincing me to drink with them, but I HATE it, I absolutely HATE it and at least my boyfriend knows. I'm on my antidepressants and I never drink when I'm on them. Besides, I can't deal with drunk people or with being drunk myself as I can't deal with the "unconsciousness". I just don't feel comfortable and it freaks me out.

I don't say that they should stop drinking, if they think they need it, alright. BUT: does it have to be so often? Where is the point in being drunk, blaming yourself in front of many other people and maybe throwing up in the end like our landlords did it last friday?
I just don't see the point in it.


Is it just me or is it what adults usually do? :blink:

It's what most young adults, and some older adults, do.

When I first went to uni I drank a lot and the appeal of it for me was the feeling unrestrained, so I'd dance in clubs and talk much more freely and do things which I would find uncomfortable without the alcohol. Being drunk is an enjoyable feeling, just not if you drink too much (and either throw up or feel horrendous the next morning).

But the past few years I've hardly drunk at all, and I can say for a fact that I felt much better when I wasn't drinking. More able to concentrate, able to get up in the mornings and just much more 'well'.

If you don't like drinking then that's fine and undoubtedly better for your health, but at the same time it's their lives and they probably enjoy it (as I once did), otherwise they wouldn't do it. It's all about learning your own limits too, as in when to STOP - that's one of the most important things to learn I think, but it takes getting it wrong a few times (and throwing up etc).

Maybe I didn't describe it precisely...
I don't mind people drinking alcohol to get a bit more relaxed and maybe a bit more funny (I actually find it funny when my friends are a bit drunk and are just funny but not in an embarrassing way). So I like drinking alcoholic cocktails in bars as well, but I don't understand the point in just being as drunk as possible o.O

I mean, when they have a "party" here, it doesn't last much longer than maybe one or two hours at the latest. They don't drink to socialise, they just drink to get wasted and end up really messy. They think if you don't throw up in the end, the party wasn't funny enough :crazy:

They only drink shots, maybe 5 to 10 within 2 minutes to get as hammered as possible. I'm just wondering if it's just me who don't find it fun to be around them?? Because it's always me who is never on the booze with them because I hate their manners and the stuff they talk about when they're drunk (e.g. women who make males horny and stop them before having sex are guilty if they are raped) :woot:

The people I'm talking about are not young, well, not all of them... My boyfriend is 22, but the owner are almost 50 and they say to me I'm boring because I've never ever thrown up because of alcohol intoxication...:plain:

most young adults drink to excess, and most adults drink socially.

if NZ is anything like what ive heard about australia, yeah, everyones gonna be getting pissed around you.

a lot of people like that "unconsciousness". i know i do. but then again, i go to the substance abuse forum for a more illegal drug.

good for you if you dont drink. my friend only drinks 1 drink when we all go out. its cool. =] good luck with the people around you drinking a lot

I can relate to this...and I like to drink. I have some friends with serious drinking problems (one is in jail for his 3rd drunk driving offense, a bartender I know just committed suicide by drinking himself to death)...The one who is in jail drinks to forget, to get hammered, etc. He can be rude, mean - he's said stuff to me I won't even repeat - self-destructive, etc. I don't get that. I like drinking, but not to that extent. Yeah, I've had my nights where I had a few too many, but compared to most people my age (I'm 25), what I consider embarassing for myself is nothing next to what others do.

You can try and talk to your BF. I've tried talking to my friend who is in jail about his drinking....Not saying your BF is at this point, but...it gets to a certain point where your talking to deaf ears. You said your BF is 22? That's still really young; he could just grow out of it in time...That lifestyle gets old. Otherwise, I'd suggest different activities you guys can do together...If he objects, I'd ask him what his deal is and talk about why he places such an emphasis on booze.

I'm sorry you're having a tough time.

Hey, I kinda get what your saying. I worked abroad for a summer (and some winter) and all the workers just wanted to be drunk every night, go out, have fun until 6am then get up for work at 8am.
I couldn't keep up I have to say.
I hate drinking to the point where i'm sick and even now when I go out and my mates are getting the drinks in, I pass on a few rounds cause I just don't like that 'out of control' feeling..not when I'm not in a safe enviroment (at home I'm in a safe enviroment but not out in clubs/bars-or atleast it doesn't feel safe to me)

I think you have to remember that lots of people go and work abroad for the summer/winter seasons, do so to have fun and party..it's practically a holiday (though working is hard)

Can you break it up a bit, suggest other things to do? I don't know like games night..do you have a beach near by? could you go and play cricket or rounders or something on the beach? or have a bbq?
So the 'having fun' part isn't soley focused on getting hammered.

We done a 'come dine with me' thing where we had a dinner party each night for a week and a different person 'hosted' each night and made a menu and cooked and then the 'guests' had to score them. It was quiet sophisticated (especially being as the eldest was probably 24) No-one got 'messy drunk' on those nights and it was good fun.

Speak to your boyfriend about it too, if you can't make a 'group thing' then maybe just do something with him or a few nights of the week so you don't have to be around it too much if it's getting tiresome.

yeah that would annoy me too. And I really like drinking. To me I like to drink because it makes me less anxious and have more fun, but I generally only have 2-4, at most 5 drinks in a night cause I've gotten wasted (thrown up, passed out) once and I hated it. I personally don't know why people want to throw up but I guess maybe they're trying to run from something and blacking out helps them forget. But seriously, they shouldn't be saying horrible things like that or ragging on you for not getting wasted. You have every right not to drink like that, it isn't healthy anyway. They really should respect that you don't want to drink like they do. I agree that you should try to do some other stuff. Maybe also instead of having parties all the time at the house, maybe suggest going out to drink like at a bar, cause if they get that wasted that fast most bars will kick them out so that might be an incentive for them to slow it down a bit and focus on socializing too. But yeah I can see why that bothers you and I do think you should suggest some alternative ways to hang out some of the time and maybe not go sometimes when you know their behavior is going to really bother you.

Yeah it is what plenty of young adults do...

I'm a uni student in Australia - I understand your frustration about being surrounded by drunken idiots all the time. I hate it when people drink to get drunk. I hate it. and I get laughed at if I'm at a party, not drinking, and not driving either - because apparently driving is the only excuse you can have to not drink :| guh *rant over*

I'm also like you in the sense that I hate not being in control/"unconscious" when under alcohol - it makes me scared :P

I've never touched alcohol in my life. I experienced too much hurt from my parents', particularly my father's drinking.
Although they gave me drops of brandy to calm me down and make me sleep when I was a baby. :| But since then, nothing has touched my lips alcohol wise at all.

I personally abuse alcohol - not to the point where I have a problem - but I love drinking and getting drunk when I'm feeling low, or sometimes I do it because I want to be in the mood to go out and have a laugh.

However, that said, I haven't gotten drunk in over six months and whilst I feel more pain, I also feel 'healthier'.

My friend doesn't drink - actually a few of my friends don't and they are 20, like me. Some people will party hard (almost all of my friends party) but some don't party hard. Don't feel bad if you're not the only one not drinking - it's not abnormal at all :)

EDIT: I just read someone above said that they didn't like the loss of control; I relate. Once I got so drunk I almost got arrested, and I can barely remember anything about that evening however I told a man I didn't know, that I loved him and allowed him to take myself and my friend to a bus stop, alone.

First many young adults in NZ drink alot but what is portrayed in the news to other countries is usually dramatized...so please be careful when making statements like this.

Secondly, getting overly drunk is a way for people to forget their problems, the crap day they had and so on. So for many people around us, who dont turn to the behavious we do drinking and getting drunk is their vice.

I drink because it helps me express myself more. Maybe this sounds ridiculous, but touching isn't awkward for me when I've been drinking and it's hard for me to give anyone the slightest touch sober. So in a way, drinking is good for me [and has actually helped me become more natural sober]. But I don't get so smashed I forget what I do and I certainly do not drink every night [or even every weekend].

There's definately nothing wrong with not drinking. I actually find being sober around drunks funny at times. Certainly better than most things on the TV these days. ;)

I think i understand you.

Im fine with people drinking. I'm find with people getting drunk.

I'm not fine with people who purposefully go out with the expressed intention of getting as drunk as possible. I just don't see the point is getting to a state where you can't even remember the night? I find it quite pathetic.

People with a problem with alcohol are *not* pathetic.

I drink too much, and too often, not to the extent of alcoholism and the like but I think I'm flirting with dependance. I drink to get to a point where it all doesn't matter. I can get upset and it doesn't matter, things are funnier, I can talk more freely and I'm not so cripplingly self concious. With me it's two pronged:

Drinking alone serves the purpose of getting out of my head for a while, either I let myself get upset, have a cry or whatever and let it out which I don't often do otherwise, or I have a feeling of happy well being and humour, which is also quite rare otherwise.

Drinking around others is a bit more complex. Basically I used to be very shy, I worked hard, I overcame it, now I think most people (who aren't very close to me) see me as confident and sometimes downright obnoxious, but in reality I still have paralysing anxiety in a lot of social situations, I'm painfully self concious of everything I do or say, how I look, whether people are looking at me/talking about me (I know I'm not that fascinating but I can't help the thoughts ;-p). When I've had a drink that melts away. Being with people is by and large just Fun, who gives a **** if they are staring/talking about me, who gives a **** if I'm talking bollocks and everyone hates me. If that makes sense? Even one to one interactions with very, very close friends I find a lot easier after a few drinks, otherwise I tend to feel self concious, I also prefer it if they've had a drink too, so they are less in tune to what a **** I am :)

God that was a long, messed up post ;-p

I hardly ever drink because it makes me feel like crap. I think when I was younger and hence underage, it was more appealing because I felt like a rebel.

But yeah, whenever I tell someone that I don't drink, I get weird looks =/