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Damnation. 11-07-2009 01:19 AM


wildly insane 11-07-2009 02:21 AM

*hugs Todlich* what's up hun?

*embraces group huggle* thanks Hayley, glad to hear you're still humming a happy tune

*hugs Secrets* hope your few days off go well

*cuddles Cheryl gently* we're here if you need us

*hugs Arwen* good luck for getting onto the Access course, what does that mean for you? I always want to drink more, even when I know it's possibly the most dangerous thing for me to do as it stops me fighting.

*hugs Shadowedseraph* hope you're okay

*hugs Helen* get well soon hun, hope you enjoy the rest of your stay at Jade's

*hugs Hannahbanana* good luck with eating, stay strong, I think Shadowedseraph might be right and the controller did read it.

*hugs Katie* hope you enjoy the weekend.

*hugs Kat, Kahlia, Jem, Vicki, Jazz and anyone else wanting a hug*

I went swimming today, my brother asked me why I liked swimming lengths cos it bores him, I was thinking about it, I like the way the water parts between my fingers and over my skin, I like the way my brain is empty apart from concentrating on each breath and each stroke and remembering which length I am on. Didn't do enough work though, never do, I want to give up on job hunting, it's so demoralising :( had fun dancing tonight, I could dance forever.

CrazyHayley 11-07-2009 02:38 AM

*bounces around ward*

Hmmm, I can't sleep. Insomnia....maybe....but this is insomnia that although I'm tired, I'm weirdly awake enough to do things....and wanting to do things....like I thought why stay in bed and try to go to sleep when I could be putting my energies into something constructive, even if I don't have that much energy right now 'cos I should be sleeping.....hmm....

*huggles Hannah* thanks for the hugs and I enjoyed reading your description about swimming...makes me ponder....

*huggles Todlich* hope the feeling of bleh passes quickly for you, you know we're here for you if you want to talk

So then....quiet night so far by all accounts.....oh gosh, I hope its not that I waffle too much and send you into hiding....eek

*goes and takes angel butt into corner to be quiet and unobtrusive*

Damnation. 11-07-2009 03:29 AM

Just got my own **** to worry 'bout, and I'm worried 'bout a friend too. Awkward conversation is awkward, and even though I say I'll do whatever I can, I just...I dunno what to say anymore

wildly insane 11-07-2009 11:13 AM

aww hun, just let them know you care, don't worry about knowing the right thing to say, you're a good friend and I'm sure they know it. I hope you have someone to help you deal with your **** as well *hugs* take care, ok.

MammaMia 11-07-2009 11:30 AM

I'm in total denial about a few things I think =/

Had a massive breakdown (and boy do I mean MASSIVE) last night and I think already trying to pretend I'm okay....

Meant to be going home today but staying here til Monday, as don't want to take the risk of collasping and don't feel upto travelling...

*leaves hugs for all*

shadowedseraph 11-07-2009 02:06 PM

*hugs MammaMia* do you think a trip to a&e might be in order?

*hugs wildly insane* how are you doing honey?

*hugs Todlich* sometimes its hard knowing what to say

*hugs crazyhaley* glad your feeling so well *joins in group hug*


I'm all alone in the house for the next few hours, im using all my willpower not to slip up in some way or another

wildly insane 11-07-2009 04:14 PM

Thanks Shadowedseraph *hugs back* you okay there, hope you can distract yourself okay, I'm online for a while if you need a hand. I'm okay, tired of everything, but am having an easy as it comes day.

*hugs Helen* take care of yourself hunny

*hugs Hayley* don't be quiet I enjoy having you bouncing around :)

*hugs Todlich* hope you're feeling better

shadowedseraph 11-07-2009 04:46 PM

*hugs wildly insane* i've managed to be ok, my parents have just rung to say they're on they're way back! Glad your having an ok day

Eclectica 11-07-2009 05:25 PM

Somebody shoot me, seriously. If this is what happens when somebody comes out, I shouldn't be around people. At all. Or myself. I nearly got sent to hospital for SHing that I didn't do.

I'm stupid. Stupid stupid stupid.

zowie 11-07-2009 06:26 PM

*Hugs everyone*
Just woke up from a nap so feeling a little too groggy to do individual replies. Sorry.

My little sister's hamster died last night. She was very upset.
Then, when my dad looked in the cage, he saw that there was absolutely no food in there. Not even hoarded stuff.
She hasn't been sleeping in her own room for a while, so dad hasn't been in there to take her to bed which is when he usually checks her hamster is okay.
I realised that last time I held the hamster I mentioned how incredibly thin she was, and when dad gave her some lettuce she wolfed it down - Didn't store any of it in her cheeks like hamsters usually do.
So me and dad have come to the conclusion that she starved to death. We found her collapsed by her empty water bottle.
I feel so sad and angry. She loved that hamster so much, so why didn't she look after it properly??
Stupid child. Poor hamster.

wildly insane 12-07-2009 01:46 AM

a bottle of wine later and I've just mucked it all up again. I want to give in, but something still holds on...

Lilo 12-07-2009 01:56 PM

*comes in and curls up in duvet*

*needs hug*

shadowedseraph 12-07-2009 03:57 PM

*hugs wildly insane* what happened honey?

*hugs Laurawr* can i share your duvet?

Eclectica 12-07-2009 04:33 PM

I've never felt so so so bad for having MPD.

I hate the Coreand want them gone. They hurt too many people (around eight at LEAST) just by coming out and talking about horrible, sick things in detail that's happened to me.

I'm lost and scared.

Lilo 12-07-2009 05:21 PM


sure you can share my duvet Shadow :)

*makes hot chocolate*


zowie 12-07-2009 05:25 PM

*Hugs Hannah* Hold onto the positives sweetie.

*Hugs Laurawr* Hope you're okay

*waves to Seraph* How are you?

*Hugs Kat* I'm sorry you're struggling hun. I'm here if you need to talk.


My sister came over last night, first time I've seen her since she got back from holiday. It was nice, she cought me back a litre of wine and we drank until the early hours :)

*Retreats to smoking shelter*

Lilo 12-07-2009 05:39 PM


thanks Zowie im good now :D

Snuggles on sofa with blanket


YodaBearInterrupted 12-07-2009 06:04 PM

I give up. Guess I will sit in here cause I feel unsafe right now and there's none of my friends to help... sigh... i give up

Eclectica 12-07-2009 06:41 PM

Using my phone for the first time since THAT incident, but it also told me the date it all happened.

Wiping my phone clean completely. New start, I hope.

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