hmm okay I know I'm taking the easy way out and not going to work, but I can physically get myself out of bed I just feel drained and very panicky and I don't know why, just that I'm it isn't helped by mum screaming at me saying there is noithing wrong. sorry being a wimp and I should get up and just go.

*hugs everyone*

Anxiety is not your fault,you do deserve to live. All of us here struggle with something and it doesn't make any of us any less of a person.

Jill, don't apoligse, you have as much right to be here as anyone else. Sometimes the easy way out is all we can face, and if you're not ready to go back to work yet then that's just fine. It's your life and your mind, you do what you're comfortable with. Try not to pay attention to you mum, although I know it's not that easy. I think she just finds it hard and doesn't know what to do, how to react. When my mum found out about my self harm, I told her it was a one off and she asked me to make a better job of it the next time so she had one less mouth to feed. It's just how parents react sometimes when they don't know what else to do. Although, my mum genuinly doesn't love me, but still.

thanks Hun, just wish I could stop thinking these things, that I just want to kill myself, stop crying and go back to being sort of happy. This isn't how it's suppost to be, I can breath being sad all the time.what happened to that happy 6 year old that was always smiling, I want that Jill back.

*Squishes Jill*

*Hugs Lia*

*Hugs Helen*

*Hugs Louise* I'm glad you like the song

Squishes mark back, how's you Hun?

*hugs Jill* I feel ok , I'm not utter crap for the first time in weeks and its thrown me , I don't know what to do with myself . Anyone been down for so long they're lost without it ?? make sense?

i spy a crimson & a mark!! *glomps*

yeh, mark, i understand what you mean. :) and thanks for the comment in my lj... means a lot to me that you're reading it. *squishes*

i'm so exhausted... and it's only noon here. doing the same thing as yesterday and it's making my eyes cross... ughhh. the auditors are here too so it feels like i have to be very very quiet as i'm in the same room as they are. yuck. don't want to be here... but only one more day & then i'll be DONE!!!! :D

we're working on planning when to do what with the apartment's flea infestation. mothballs, air foggers, trip to the vet's for daniel, and then we'll be going to my parents' for a few days. that will be okay i think. i won't be able to be online as much but at least i won't have the commute to my internship place to worry about!!! :)

urghh... just want to sleep. i had a chai, hot drinks make me sleepy, so that wasn't a good idea. and screw grammar, i'm sick of being perfect with it!! :-X

feeling low and sad today... :(

sorry no individual replies really, just know i'm thinking of you all and praying for those of you who don't mind. *cuddles all who don't mind* ♥

*glomps april back*
is it friday yet?

*hugs crimson* I dont want Friday to get here, but for your sake i hope the rest of your week goes by quick.

*hugs april* yay you're almost done! Sorry about the fleas, that really sucks, but at least something is going to get done about it.

*hugs helen, mark, jill, and lia*

My sister called me this morning and sometimes she really really really pisses me off. If you don't compliment every move she makes and give the exact correct responses she is looking for she gets all cold and standoffish and then will randomly say "bye" and hang up. I'm so annoyed right now about it. But if you try to explain that she cannot react like that all the time she goes "no one ever has a kind word for me, i hate my life." Which just makes me even more angry. *sigh* sorry about the mini rant about her, she just hung up on me so im highly annoyed

*hugs Laura* I totally understand your anger.

*hugs everyone*

I can't do this any more. :(

Whats up Lindsay ? *Hug*

I Can't focus still , My day has been hectic but I say down to play WoW and I just can't focus , I REALLY hope my low mood doesen't come back to me tomorow, I 've got the feeling I,m only okay today because I S.I. so yesterday . :S

i spy a kat!! *glomps* hehe... how are you, love?

i'm really having a hard time focusing on much of anything... i'm home now, got let off work early, so that made me happy. tomorrow's my last day and we'll see how that goes - woohoo!! :D i'm so excited to be done, it will be fantastic. :) and then... focusing on apps for res. :-X i really really don't want to do that but oh well... :(

i'm exhausted. i just want to sleep... so sick of the bullshit that swirls around in my head. :'(

*hides in a hole after sending cuddles out to everyone who wants them*

*hugs everyone*

*glomps april* i'm alright *yawns* getting cabin fever! I so have to get out of this house sometime soon. It's not fair, Jack gets all the fun, and the closest I get to time out is a quick half hour domestic shopping trip. How are you lovely?

Concentration , concentration concentration , where are you ? I feel bad for blowing Hayley off playing WoW.

Hey Kat*HUGS*

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs April* One LAST day woop!

Mark go sleep now . I hope my mood is okay tommorow too but with more FOCUS!!!

Don't feel bad Mark. Hayley'll understand *hugs*
Yay! Almost there April! *throws confetti*
*hugs everyone*

*huggles mark* Hey! Hope you have a good sleep Mark. *hands you a freshly baked cal free chocolate chunk cookie and a glass of warm milk*


*huggles crimson* beat me to posting!