The Diaz has kicked in , I'm just gonna take a little time over in front of my tv

AAARRGHH im so angry!

Whats up Nicole?

west side story is amazing.

*comes out from under the floorboards, he needs to prepare for his concert now, so no more hiding*
sent an email to teacher to talk about deferring recital, going to talk to her on friday.

*pops in to offer cuddles to all, especially Oliver & Mark, then pops out to head to class*

Thinking of you all... many cuddles & love to each and every one of you!!!! :) I'll be back on later, hopefully, after senior sem... hopefully I won't be feeling like SI'ing in that class due to getting back a bad grade or something... :-S

*hides*

Mark~ It's not whining. And we're here to help :)

Hayley~ if he comes to the US since it isn't a deployment would he be able to bring you with him? Yay on getting your doctor agreeing! Hope it helps. :)

Oliver~ This is going to sound greedy but... YOU CAN NOT DIE ON ME!!!
But on the school work I agree that an extension on you work may be beneficial. It would give you room to breath since you have a lot on your proverbial plate right now.

*hugs Nicole* What happened hun?

*sits to watch west side story*

*hugs everyone*
I'm considering sleeping in the day and staying awake all night just so I can be around when all you guys are :(

*hugs everyone*

Been soooooooooo many posts since this morning.

Hope people are feeling better.

Have had an amazing day with my friend. Already miss her. I kept collapsing though, godamm you fainting!!! Haven't had a bad spell like today for a little while, so was really distressing. Was incredibly dizzy most of the time but she was really good to me ^_^ She even let me talk about stuff, ended up ranting about mh services, oh dear!!! Then gained a nasty migraine, ****ing thing :@ Not-so-nice journey home, battery died before I even left & was just so stressful. I was like if anything happens to me, I hardly have any money && no mobile =/ Luckily I got home in one piece. Even if the bus driver nearly sent me through the window screen. My legs ache sooooooooooooo much. But then again, I did pretty much walk for nearly 12 hours (minis sitting on buses/trains/on the floor/in the pub etc..)

*cuddles everyone again and goes to hide in her hiding space*

Really want my best friends :(

*huggles everyone*

Sorry, too many posts for me to do individual replies - 4 pages since I was in here last night.

Going to try and get some ammo to fight the healthcare battle this morning. Plan A is in progress and we are going to do work to cement it, then work onm Plans B through to E ... and so on. So over all this. :(

*disappears into a corner for a cry*

So tired of fighting.
So exhausted from today, can't sleep yet, my migraine will make it so painful to.
**** this.

*hides again*
I'm actually not going to be able to get through the night without doing something serious, death is the only thing on my mind, I'm scared.

*hugs Oliver* - Is there anyone IRL you can talk to or be with? Can you call a crisis line? I know it's hard, but try to fight it. I wish I could say that it gets easier, but I can't. Maybe even distractions or the 15 second game?

no one I can be with at the moment, I could call the samaritans, but I don't know, dont like talking on the phone, I'm trying distractions, but concentration so bad i cant focus on one thing for that long.
*hides*

I understand where you are coming from with the phones ... I absolutely hate it myself. I wish I could be there with you - It's about 10:20 here which means it's like ~ 1:20 am there? What kind of distractions are you using at the moment? Is anything helping or making it easier? *offers hugs*

*cuddles Oliver* Sorry its not more but dealing with people today is casuing me to be a bit scattered right now.

yeah its about 1.20am here, well at the moment I'm emailing my tutor, but thats taking ages, have to stop every few words and reread it constantly to check its ok, other than that I dont know.

thanks for the cuddles crimson *returns cuddles, then hides again*
sorry I am being so useless.

*sits and holds Oliver's hand for as long as needed, even if its all night*
It's good you're emailing your tutor. *huggles*

thanks crimson
sorry everyone I feel so pathetic in asking for help

*cuddles Oliver* - Asking for help is never pathetic. If you don't feel safe, or able to keep yourself safe, then it is far better to ask for help than to sit alone in the dark (so to speak). How did you go with emailing your tutor? *sits down beside Oliver and settles in for as long as needed*

Hey Crimson, how are you doing? Recovering a bit from your day dealing with people? *huggles you*

thank you for sitting with me guys.
i've sent the email to my tutor, see what she says in morning
*walks around ward to try help distract himself*