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cool cool its all good do you want help with the tea
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*holds cup out for more tea and sympathy*
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my shadow told me a secret today. she says she doesn't really love anyone. it's all just words. the deep inside of her can't feel a thing. i'm going to leave her here for just a while longer. she's not so lonely here. it's worse outside where everyone else can feel things.
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Gah. My day just went from ok to horrible in 5 minutes. I come home, and get the same old lecture! Its about my councler lady. Im not all that comfortable talking with dad about my councling, and he keeps bugging me saying i need to talk to him about the things I talk about there. He don't get that i'm not ready to talk to him about councling and cutting and I won't be for a while. I'm trying to set a goal of not cutting at least until I get back from camping. [which is Aug. 12th] but my dad just piled anxitey and Im feelin pretty triggered right now...
Yea, I needed to get that out. I feel miserable and worthless... *Grabs more tea, sits in a corner, and puts on IPod to try and relax for a bit* On a slightly lighter note, you can call me Josh, or Joshua, or TSC, whatever you are more comfortable with is fine. |
*checks in again*
Thats it im giving up!! I quit YOU HEAR ME WORLD I QUIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 *runs and hides in the corner* |
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hey doll.. wotz up.. u need an ear? peace and love. x |
Hey Nikki babe,
Wanna talk? Whats up..? *Holds your hand* *(*( HUG )*)* |
I just want to give up!!
Im sick of living like this!! I thought i could get rid of everything but i cant!! i WANT TO TAKE A HIT SOOOO BAD RIGHT NOW |
just need to have a safe place to be for some reason composing music is really taking it out of me *sits in corner*
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*checks self in* grabs blanket and hides in corner cursing life and the people at Bracknell Forest
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* finds a blanket and goes looking for someone to hug*
just need people without them actually being near me |
hey emily do you want a hug or a chat *opens arms for a hug*
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*hug* just company that isnt in the same room
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i can keep you company is there anything random you want to talk about hun
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just anything. . . the weather anything
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okay well the weather is terrible up here but well its rainy what about your end hun
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*grabs her stuffed lamb and blanket, curls up in a corner and cries quietly*
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*gives hugs to anyone that wants them including Ally* Hey guys and girls, turned up for therapy a day early.... i feel dumb! *drags out the tea trolley and offers it round*
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*walks in, grabs blanket and stuffed bear and walks in a dark corner to cry*
i want to go away |
*offers hugs to Rowena* aww hun whats up?
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*hugs shadowedseraph back and takes a cup of very strong tea*
Don't worry about it hun I am sure you're not the first and odds are good you won't be the last... *goes back to her corner* |
Thanks Ally. *settles down with blankey and cushion*
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nights working
days sleeping i jusr need HIM next to me why cant i see the one i love ARRRRGGGGG I STILL WANT A HIT |
*sings along with a Nirvana song, and writes some lyrics*
Bah, I still feel pretty empty even after councling. Talking to my friend right now. I realy hope she does not get sore with me. Thats the last thing I need right now :( |
*admits self* sits in the corner and cries
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Im dreading going back to school on monday, I managed to avoid the last few days and I dont know what to do my dad keeps asking if I am ok and I say no but it doesnt seem to get through |
good luck :) its very brave that ur going back you know. people should be proud of you. they say the first step is always the hardest.. keep strong and it'll work out. try talking to your dad about it if you feel you can
xxx |
*hugs* thanks, I dont think I can though, the longer Im away the more peopel worry the more they worry the harder to go back
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u will be ok. just go for it say i'm back and ready to go and if people ask you say something like i'm back cos i want to be here or something and chat to those u feel comfortable with.
to everyone, i just had a rubbish patch this morning but i went on live help chatted to Gothic Angel and rung by GP surgery and i feel better now. just hope counselling goes ok this afternoon |
*pulls blanket over head* i have therapy in half an hour and i dont wanna go *sobs* *hugs for emily and simmie* going back to school is hard, have you tried explaining to your dad rather than just telling him you feel bad?
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*checks in for a few days* can i have a big duvet? brought my own giant teddybear with me
******* this place is an amazing idea.. can we have a real room like this too? i could see it working with all this support. |
hey everyone. *hands severina a big cuddly duvet*
*goes searching for more pillows and blankets to hide under* |
*waves at everyone*
hey,can i join you all please? feeling rather low |
yes of course you can. *offers pillow/blankets*
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*offers massive hugs too*. Do you want to talk about it?
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i'm not sure.
the hugs are the bes thanks you *burrows down inside a blanket* i am so weak |
I'm sure you arent weak. Everyone does 'weak' things some times but it doesnt mean they are a weak Person (if you get me). I am here if you want to talk x
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I need... I dont know. I don't deserve anything.. I knew I was bad and now this has happened. Proved it. Punishment. I need to hide here... Im.. lost
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I have to quit college
I cant afford it I have to give up my dream Im Broken all over again *sobs* |
*hugs Nikki*
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I just feel like I need to curl up in a dark corner and disappear
*fades into the background* I have a full day rehearsal for dance tomorrow and then a full competition day on Wednesday 5am till after midnight I cant deal...... shoot me |
back from being away and feel like crap-i am crap
someone threw my blades away i want to die |
*hugs tortured beauty*
*hides under blanket* The following content has been hidden - Reason : suicidal
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*hugs newlife and carole* please dont hurt yourself, either of you, you are worth more than that. I know it's hard but resist. I am thinking of you both. Be strong xx
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I know it's hard but maybe try not to focus on 'how long' you can go on feeling like you do but instead focus on the fact you have made it so far and concentrate on one day or hour or whatever you CAN manage at a time
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it might make things easier and also not worrying about how long you can cope may enable you to feel more clear headed and more capable to find a solution. Maybe tell your boyfriend quite simply in a text or something that you cant write at the moment, not because you dont care but because you need to focus on you for a while but you will when you feel up to it?
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crying is ok. I understand you feel you have to write the letter but please be safe. My PM box is always open. *Hugs*
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*checks out* I have to go to dance :( I havent been near people in 5 days I hope this goes ok
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good luck emily.disenchanted! *hugs* hope it goes ok x
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