|
|
*snuggles Ally*
|
Ally I'm sorry hun...have you spoken to anyone else about these thoughts? *huggles*
I've lost weight....not enough...but it's a start :-D Erm....erm....erm... damn :/ I'm bored.... *dances til she loses more weight* |
OH *RUNS IN*
GUYS!!! Katey-Lou text me...she's with the Crisis Team and they are seeing if they can admit her...so she wanted me to say hi to you all for her and she said she will try get on ASAP. That is all. My job is done. |
I think I'm gonna end up losing weight and all.
=\ |
I'm sorry so many people are struggling atm, its not fair wish i had some magic fairy dust to sprinkle on us all and make us all ok!
I feel so drained, can't do this anymore. Having those thoughts really bad even though i'm in hospital :( |
Went into hopsital today and walked past the pysc ward. Felt like that was where I should be. The people in there would understand. Not like anyone in the 'real world'.
I hope everyone is doing okay. Alex - I followed you in here. I know you are having a hard time but remember: "Give me a Reason[TO]Believe. I am your OnlyDistraction." |
Don't want to tell any one... afraid it will be too close to 'a danger to self or others' and land me in hospital... scarry thing is I kind of want to go... But I'll never tell my therapist that...
*sigh* wish I was losing weight... trying to not eat but don't have the added affect of that lovely side effect of my Wellbutrin (appiite loss) as I haven't taken it in three days *continues to cry in her corner* I'm sorry I'm so useless guys |
Quote:
|
Ally sweetheart...couldnt you go in to hospital for a little bit? especially if you would like to be?
How come you haven't taken your meds darlin?:( they are there to help you... *snuggles you and covers you in a blanket* |
*hugs ally*
you aren't useless, you seem lovely to me, anything i can do? they are making me put on weight in hospital by giving me nasty build up shakes ugh! |
*hugs Jo and Alexx*
Sorry to hear it Jo, that sucks *snuggles* lol I'm not even sure that they'd admit me just because I thought maybe I needed to be... and I would never tell them that any way... would rather die first... as to why I'm not taking my meds... well... as I told my therapist on Monday, I'm done, and I'd like to not be here but I can't seem to bring myself to kill myself because of these damn meds... so... I'm not taking them and seeing what happens:embarassed: |
Sweety we dont want you to die :(
Please take your meds? I wish I could help you...I hate seeing you upset |
Ally if you were really honest then maybe you wouldn't have to tell them that you think you need to be admitted, they might make that decision themselves? I think its good that you can't do it right now, you need to ask for some help honey, you deserve not to feel like this x
|
Just realised i've been in hospital for SEVEN weeks and am still having the feeling that i don't want to be around. don't know what to do but really need to si tonight :(
|
*offers cuddles, muffins and a friendly ear for all who need it :-)*
|
Yes, Alex - now you remember me! Haha.
*hugs* everyone. Im sorry everyone feels so crap. Ally you will always be worth something to us. Don't ever tell yourself otherwise. Jo - try a distraction? You don't need to SI, it won't help. It'll make things worse cause you'll regret it. You are in hospital to get help, not to carry on being the way you have been. We're here for you guys x |
*POUNCE*
|
Aww, Jo I'm sorry. *snuggles*
|
I am trying to be distracted (you can waste hours on facebook!) and i'm not going to cut.
Don't have anything anyway. Thanks ally *snuggles back* |
horrid day at work
am a moron have been ordering marketing materials and making travel arrangements for a trade show company is going to in june yesterday accidentally, because am moron and because seem to have attention span of gnat and memory capability of a rock, booked the president of company and manager onto wrong flight for trade show forgot conversation we had about flight times and booked a 7am not 7pm flight am idiot have made huge mistake president was so mad that he would not even speak to me haha called around and spoke to everybody else but me and had them bring me his messages was very immature and sort of funny except not because he was so upset sorted it all out and didnt have to pay flight change fee because begged to customer service on phone, but new flight is like $50 more than old flight so our purchase order is all messed up but the people in my office feel bad for me so i think they will sort it out in finance for me and i wont be in more trouble am seriously concerned about my attention span and memory though accidentally ran a red light yesterday because i was staring right at it and ummm forgot what it meant went right through and a block later it finally registered what i had done.... sad part is that is not the first time it happened :/ i did bad things today and dont even care. i think i am dehydrated or something i keep shaking again. just the really bad part is i dont care. i dont care that i screwed up at work and made things inconvenient for people. the only thing i care about is that i think i am developing alzheimers or dementia or have a brain tumor or something. i should care shouldnt i? <confused> hugs for all sorry i am too weird to reply to you properly |
*offers hugs, warm drinks and biscuits around*
Quote:
Omg, I love that! Absolute genius! lol Ally, please take your meds. They are there to help you sort through all the **** you have going on. Please take them. Jo, I am so sorry that you are feeling so low. Yes, you can waste hours on facebook (trust me!!) all those weird and wonderful applications to add, use once and then just leave cluttering your page untill you can be bothered to delete it! lol. What else do you distract yourself with? Wow, suddenly five of us (I think!) are trying to/want to lose weight. (Yes, I have realised that I need to lose some of this "extra baggage" lol) How are you lot going about it? Alex, how are you doing? |
*hugs*
Callie, you aren't going crazy or anything. There is probably a perfectly innocent for you feeling out of sorts. Are you eating and drinking properly? |
Callliiieeee :(
I dunno what to say hunni *huggggssss* please talk to someone? your doctor or someone? please :( love you xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx |
Hi Carole *waves*
I'm lonely.... I need a guy :/ |
Holy Shiitake mushrooms!!! It is 5pm and I am just now getting outta bed!!!
|
^ niiiiiiice :P
perfect day that :P |
*waves back*
How are things going with that guy you like? (sorry for being behind but it's been so busy in here that would take me years to read all the posts! lol) |
erm...i dunno lol...went to see him on thursday...then went home...bit later he text me and invited me to the pub with him...
but its still...i dunno...odd... I fail EPICLY when it comes to having "serious chats" so everyone says "ask him where you two stand" and i just CANT |
yeah for the whole advice on losing weight thing i am not the person to ask Carole, i do not recommend doing anything that i do lol
Alexx good luck honey Ally i agree TAKE UR MEDS please all of you be safe and dont get dehydrated and please if you are starting diets or anything TAKE A DAILY MULTI VITAMIN xxxooo hugs for everybody |
Maybe asking him if he likes you would suffice?
|
I wasn't looking for advice. I'm making sure I have three meals, one of which is a home-cooked meal, each day, cutting down on chocolate and am getting into the swing of excersing regularly. I was just wondering how everyone else is doing it.
|
*snuggles Callie* have you talked to your doc or someone hun?
*snort* "Holy Shiitake mushrooms!!! " Amanda :-D thanks I needed a laugh. Take care all I'm heading in to my therapist appointment... Oh happy day... |
Quote:
|
Quote:
starving it off. Replacing meals with drinks |
I am worried,
I am drunk I am useless I should die I am not smart enough I am a bitch I cant help anyone I am a failure I cant deal with feelings I cant sleep or study I have failed to reach my potential I dont want to do this anymore I have had enough and yet nobody in R/L knows, or those that do don't even care. |
You are NOT useless...
You should NOT die... You ARE smart enough You AREN'T a bitch... You've helped me loads of times... You HAVENT failed You WILL reach your full potential |
COMPLETE ****ING WASTE OF TIME!!!!!
*throws herself down in her corner and cries* |
*squishes Ally*
Do you want to talk about it or to be left alone for a while? |
*snuggles everyone if they want it*
I feel pretty low, infact death seems rather too appealing again. ****. |
*snuggles Carol*
Well I just drove home after my session to use the hour I have before work productively... By cutting ass deeply as I can:crying: |
Emma luv, I just saw you... I pmd you sweetie *snuggles*
|
Ignorance is bliss.
:( |
*snuggles Ally, Carole, Helen, and Forever Lost*
|
Whats up Helen? Death is not a good option for you as far as I'm concerned. You are worth more. So much more.
*hugs Ally* What did your counsellor say? Thanks for the PM. I will reply in a bit xx |
*hugs Amanda*
Em, it does seem like a good option though. Would stop the pain, would mean all the bad times gone (and missing out on the good I guess)....meh. I can't DO this. I'm going to ****ing FAIL my last exam. I never EVER go out. Work people are sooo gonna STOP inviting me cus I haven't said yes to any events yet. Well I did for the first one, but that got cancelled, then will's party I said maybe and then couldnt get there.....then like should be going out tonight but I'm not :( Shall I countinue? |
*snuggles Amanda* I love you sweetie... I am Ally :-D *snuggles*
Ah, what did he say? Well we spent the first twenty or so minutes (mmm, closer to thirty really) of a fifty minute session talking about how he had been frusterated after Mondays session... Something about feeling like we weren't making progress, there being an ethical problem with continuing therapy when it doesn't appear to be helping... Mondays session he had asked me what it would mean to me not to continue therapy... And I told him that it would be one less thing on my schedual. How he was confused (and I'd wager a bit hurt) that I could be so flip about it and then want an additional session... I suppose it was slightly unfair of me to think he would realize that what that ment was I didn't want to go there and tell him that I don't look forward to not being in therapy, that I don't look forward to the time when his internship is over and he leaves. He took it as me saying that there really isn't a point or something like that. It felt awful. I wanted to look at him and say 'well fine, throw me out into the street if you want to I've done it by myself before I can do it again'. That too would have been slightly unfair and I totally understood what happened on Monday and that I should have just said what I ment. But it sucked :crying: and had me trying my hardest to not experience emotions that I hate... AND there was really no time to talk about 'being done' and how distressing that is after we had sorted that out. And so I went home and cut very deep and felt only slightly better. Think this calls for a bottle or two of wine after work... **** me:crying: |
Helen yes there IS reason to continue... If only because you've told me I have to ;-) seriously though hun, really, we all love you... Isn't that reason enough? *snuggles*
|
Quote:
|
I'm out of here for a while. I'll be avaliable via email, pm and msn incase anyone is bothered...
|
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaareerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
FOR **** ****ING SAKE It godamn ****ing hurtys. Why does nobody god damn realise this? enough is ****ing enough. My wrist ****ing canes. I hate this ****ing life. Bastards. Wanker tossers. Enough is friggin enoughg/ \AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAr4rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh *craw,lsv up in a ball to cry anf hopefull7y die* |
| All times are GMT +1. The time now is 04:45 AM. |
|
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.