Doikers - thankyou :)

Scarletdreamer - thankyou for being so nice. i started a thread in serious yesterday

*Hugs Kahlia as I Spot you * How are you today.

First thing this morning I got out of bed to my fridge , grabbed the bottle of rum and emptyed it down the sink :S I'm not intending to go out and buy any more alcohol either.

^proud of you Mark

*cuddles everyone*

Wow i havent been up this early since... well over a year lets just say that. I have the first (american) football game to go to this morning for my uni! Its a pretty huge deal around here so i'm going tailgating if people remember to call me. That would be way disappointing if they didn't. Okay, im not going to turn into a down-er. I am planning on having a good time this morning so we'll see.

Sorry that so many are struggling right now. Thinking of you all.

*leaves out an extra box of cuddles as well as some fun hawks gear if anyone else wants to support my uni team* :-P

Thankyou Laura :)

GO American Football HAWKS!!!! *Waves Flag*

PurpleElephant - you can call me April. :) And Doikers is Mark. I know, there will probably be a lot of names to remember... but hey, may as well try to get started. ;) Is there anything you'd prefer to be called (here, at least) instead of your full screenname? And you're welcome. ^_^ How are you doing today?

Mark - SO proud of you!!! Well done, big bro. XD That's an awesome step, very wise of you I think. Can't express enough how major a step that is towards recovery, either. :) How are you doing otherwise this morning? Oh, and don't feel pressured to email me, you can if you want or not, and whenever is best for you. <3

Laura - wow, yes you were up early!! :P At least, the earliest I've seen you posting on here. :) I hope that you have a fun time today at the football game. I'm really not into sports like that - watching or playing - the only sport that can really keep me entertained is tennis (lol - head goes back and forth and back and forth :P)... but I really do hope that your friends/acquaintances remember to call you and that you can go tailgating. Sounds kinda fun actually... try & enjoy yourself. ^_^

*cuddles everyone*

I'm... eh. Last night was a "huh?! WTF?!" kind of night... family issues again. I am bemused, very very bemused, by my family right now and just need to vent about it... so I think I am going to retreat to my r/v. I'll let you all know once I've updated it so those of you who are interested, can read it. :-S (Am SO glad that none of my family that I know of are on this site!!!)

*sigh* :(

Cuddles all. Sorry about last night. Curls up under a blanket and shut out the world.

April ,Thankyou :) I most probably will e-mail you ,but I need to get my thoughts together first , maybe even write it out before I mail you .

First things First , I am going to ask my nurse to breathalise me on Monday afternoon , so I know if it's safe to go back on my Antabuse.

Also , what is Tailgating? heh

*Hugs Jill*

From my understanding, tailgating is basically having a party on the tailgate of a pickup truck (at least, that's where the idea originated). I've never done it but people sometimes have picnics that way, or drinking parties, really any type of get-together that's outdoors. Laura, correct me if I'm wrong!! (Hopefully what I said makes sense!!)

Jill, love, no sorries about last night. It was fine. You needed support & asked for it. Are you doing okay this morning? *huggles*

Blah. Off I go to my r/v... >:(

*hugs april* sorry about your family issues. I am also always happy that none of my family is on the site... not that i talk about them much, but just in case you know. I will read your r/v thread later. Also, I will try to enjoy myself if I ever get to leave lol, people are running late I think as they are mostly still signed in to facebook (i sound like such a creeper there i know lol but its fb chat that is telling me lol). Hopefully it will be fun. I'm really into football so, i look forward to this every year. I understand that its very much so not some people's thing though.

*hugs jill* you okay?

*hugs mark* tailgating is when people get together in parking lots and other areas around the stadium and party and grill before the game. Trust me, there is no better place for a hamburger, even if it is 8am lol. Usually, there is random chanting and cheering for the team and it is overall just a really fun time.

Yea april explained pretty well... although we do not require a truck to have a tailgate party here lol.

Okies, r/v updated. ARGH am so angry right now... well... maybe not angry... more like pissed off/hurt. :crying:

I spy Lia and Mark!! *glomps & cuddles*

Right well I'm going mental. I thought I had replied already.

I hope you're feeling better this morning Jill *hugs*

What's wrong April? Families suck. *Hugs*

How's everyone else?

x

Okay, now I'll do some individuals.

PurpleElephant, hey! I'm Felicia! I like your avi too!

*hugs Mark* I'm SOOOOO Proud of you right now!

*hugs April* I'll go read your r/v in a minute =)

*hugs Laura* Have fun at your tailgating party! I so wish I could go to one today, but my uni team's not playing, and the team I want to go watch play is 4 hours upstate. booo =(

*hugs Jill* Feeling any better today?

*hugs Lia* How are you?

Alright, if I missed you I'm sorry. *hugs any missed wardies*

I just got up, my brain is fuzzy, and one of my very complex friends is talking to me on facebook in his very cryptic way. haha.
Ohhhh... and I have tons of homework to do, bet you guys never guessed that one. I want to get a lot done today and tomorrow so I can go do stuff with friends on Monday, since we have a three day weekend. Yay!

Huggles all. Thanks Guys, hmm still feel really down, just want to die. I'm such a screw up. Why do I keep doing this to myself.

hi april, you can call me Em :-)

and i'm doing better thanks, i've booked a doctors appointment so now thats out the way things seem less overwhelming.

hey Felicia! that is such a beautiful name

aww. Thank you Em. =)

*cuddles everyone*

*Hugs Helen* I notice from your status that you are still sick , are you still really coldified ?*Leaves Strepsils and honey and Lemon*

Can I check in? I'm having a really rough time with my family recently, just feels like I can't do anything right, I certainly can't by them (and they've said so...) *sigh*

*hugs Mark* My cold/cough are improving thank you :) Still really easily exhausted and keep feeling sick. But they're improving too. Still manages to make me feel pretty awful at times though :/ Being anxious about someone really isn't helping but I can't do anything til they get in touch I guess. I'm probably worrying over nothing!!!

*hugs everyone*

I still feel a bit sick :(

Aww no :(

There's so much poorly sickness about right now *hugs*

Cuddles all, feeling very unsafe right now, really want to hurt myself. So many messed up thoughts

*hugs*

We're here for you

*hugs everyone* We're bit of a poorly ward aswell as a struggling one it would seem =(

I'd offer around my immune system but it barely helps me. Hope you all have a speedy recovery.

I feel terribly alone, I wish my family would stop bullying me for not being able to eat anything right now (I has gallstones and they seem to think I'm faking to waste their money on food or something) :(

I'm sorry your family aren't being supportive *cuddles if okay?*

Hi Ribenalion :) Welcome to the ward , I'm Mark .

*Hugs Helen* I'm glad you are feeling a little better at least, you must be on the mend .

*Hugs Jill* Please try not to harm yourself .

*Hugs Claire* I'm sorry you're feeling poorly :(

Yay, cuddles, thanks, *cuddles back*

Hi Mark, I'm Sarah.

Hi Sarah, i'm Lindsay. How are you?

Hey Lindsay *Hugs* How are you this evening?

first off, hi sarahm im nicole, welcome to the ward. x
and then.....
i am so STUPID STUPID STUPID STUPID! argh.

*Hugs Nicole* Whats up ? You're not stupid , You are a very bright person :)

I'm not feeling safe here so I'm going to spend the night with my fiance, thanks for being here and I'll check in again tomorrow x

*Hugs Sarah* , try and stay safe :)

*hugs sarah*
*hugs mark* i AM stupid, i let a little argument with my cousin get in the way of our friendship and now she has new friends, which i wouldnt mind, but they are drug addicts and now she is getting into drugs, and i feel responsible, but i cant tell anyone, i mean, she only smokes a bit of weed, its not that bad right? but then theres her son.......

*waves to Sarah* Hi, I'm Taz.

*huggles everybody else* 8 pages since I left, so no individuals right now. Amusement park went alright, it started downpouring 2 hours in, so we left and went to the mall which was nearby, spent 2 hours shopping and then returned to the park since the weather had cleared up. Feeling really tired + just fed up at the moment, but am on day 5 of not cutting and am really determined to make it at least a week... but we'll see.

Hope everyone else is staying safe <33

*Hugs Taz* Day 5 is really good :) !!!

Hi Sarah, I'm Claire. Hope you have a good night and feel a bit better.

How are you feeling Lindsay?

Nicole *hugs* that's a tricky situation. It's her choice to take drugs though, you haven't forced that on her. I would try to talk to her, calmly so that things don't escalate.

Hi Taz, five days is good! *hugs* have a relaxing night watching a film or something?

Mark, how are you doing? *hugs*

*Hugs Claire*
I'm a touch triggered.
Have done my shopping list for tomorrow , usually I wing it but I made a list , How Efficient!
I have been really BADLY wanting to drink ( alcohol ) this evening but I haven't got any in , although the off licence is open until 11pm . I want Monday to come and for me to be able to take my Antabuse , it's a huge insentive to not drink.I need to be breathalised by my nurse first .
I'm off to bed soon , I have taken a Diaz and got up at a reasonable time so I hope I sleep well.

How are you claire?

Cuddles all, hmm really not in a good frame of mind tonight. Was walking to catch my bus home and all could think of was i really wanted to step in front of a car. My heads so messed up right now.

*hugs Mark* try to use that as an incentive, and you know that alcohol doesn't help anything, you know that. Sleep well!

*hugs everyone* I'm not feeling too great, a bit mangled in my mind I think.

I'm at my friend's and in a fairly good mood watching 'tv's greatest mistakes'l I'll do a better reply when I'm not on my phone. xx

what can i put with vodka? i have no orange juice or coke or anything and i cant drink it neat....

Taz, well done! You're doing fantastically.

Mark, you can do this, I believe in you. Stay strong.

Shadowedsoul, that sounds scary. I have been in that position before. I hope you feel better soon.

Claire, do you want to talk about it?

Lia, i'm glad you're feeling ok.

I'm not too bad. I haven't self harmed yet which is good but I don't know if I can hold off for much longer. The crisis team are supposed to be getting in touch with me but i've heard nothing yet.

Nicole, can you drink something else?

no. i have only got vodka, and i want it, but it makes me sick neat.

*hugs Mark* Thanks. I hope you sleep well tonight <33 And good job on not having a drink! You can keep it up :D

*hugs Claire* Thanks... and I hope your mind unmingles itself soon <3

*hugs Lia* I'm glad you're doing alright!

*hugs Nicole* You can always put water with it. It covers the taste of the vodka quite nicely. Even better, put water and then a lemon wedge if you have one :)

*hugs Lindsay* Thanks :) Fingers crossed the crisis team contacts you soon <3

*hugs Jill* Ick, sorry to hear hun :( I've had that feeling too, it's awful. I'm glad you still posted though, which means you didn't step in front of them :)

*hugs taz* thanks, i might try that, i dont think i have nay lemon, but i will have a look, im hoping drinking will stop me from ODing or self harming even more :(

*hugs Nicole*

Lindsay, my dad isn't well, and I don't really know how to cope. I'm not good at this stuff. Now I'm sitting in tears trying not to cut. I'm just totally lost.