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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

FlyingNy 16-01-2011 03:08 AM

Hey Kitty :)

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 03:17 AM

Hey Lia. You doing ok?

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 03:30 AM

-spots and waves to kahlia- How you be?

Kahlia1981 16-01-2011 03:32 AM

Kitty: Not too crash hot to be honest. How are you sweet?

*huggles all*

Back pain has been bad the last two days - a sign of the narrowing of the spinal canal and squeezing of the spinal nerves. *sigh* Guess I'm going to have to get used to it.

Mood is crashing - psychiatrist appointment on Wed. What fun ...

Little bit over everything right now...

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 03:39 AM

I'm alive. Kinda blah. Just waiting. Got plans for Thursday and thats far away. So I am just sitting waiting for time to go by and for Thursday to get here. Have my counseling appointment on Tuesday where I will briefly tell her of my plans, but not enough to send me away. Just enough to let her know. Won't be too long now...just don't know when. -hugs- Sorry you aren't doing so well. Anything I can do to help?

Kahlia1981 16-01-2011 03:46 AM

I know kind of how that rolls. I have to tell my psychiatrist about me almost attempting suicide early in January. I've only told 1 person IRL about it and how close I came. Everyone IRL (except that person) thinks my depression has lifted when it hasn't and doesn't realise that I still have the "means to my end" in the house. It's going to be a "fun" session. I just wish it was over already.

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 03:47 AM

-spots and waves to just an illusion- How are you?

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 03:50 AM

I can relate, Kahlia. My mom told me, when I was first diagnosed with depression and PTSD as a teenager, that it was just a phase. My husband feels that I should be better because I'm married now. He doesn't see how I can have these issues. My mom still tries to run my life even though I have moved out. She won't stop. I am never good enough for her. I'm done trying..

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 03:58 AM

*hugs all* sorry i've not been around for a while.

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 04:00 AM

-hugs oliver- How are you? How have you been?

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 04:10 AM

not great. you?

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 04:12 AM

Same. What's wrong? -hugs oliver-

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 04:29 AM

where to start. I'm trying to hold it all together so I don't let people down, but inside I'm screaming in agony.
*hugs Kitty*

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 04:36 AM

So tired of everything. Tired of fighting. Tired of trying, but coming up short, not good enough for my mom. That's ok though. I have a plan to make it all right. -hugs oliver- I know how you feel, though. I'm sorry that you are not doing well. :( Anything I can do to help?

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 04:53 AM

*hugs Kitty* I'm sorry, know how you feel too :(
i just want the pain to go, but even though I'm not in uni for this year there are still things I have to do and people I would let down, how do you fight day by day, when each day is absolute agony

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 04:59 AM

-shrugs- I don't know anymore. I am worried I will let a few people down as well. But I have felt like **** since I was 6 years old (I am 22 now, going on 23). My mom won't leave me alone until either she dies or I die, and I don't anticipate her dying any time soon, unless there was a freak accident. I am just never good enough for her. I'm tired of being a failure..

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 05:18 AM

*hugs Kitty* your not a failure

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 05:22 AM

-hugs oliver- Yes I am. I am too fat. I have a skin problem which I don't know what it is it's not acne but it's kinda like it. I don't have a job. I mean, I can't work at this point, but that does not matter to her. She hounds me about me needing to get a job. She hounds me about losing weight. She tells me to exercise but I can't really exercise because of my back problems. If I get a B- in a class she doesn't think that's good it's always "You can do better". I'm never good enough. I figured out I never will be. So I have made the decision on what needs to be done. It's just a matter of when now.

frenchhorn 16-01-2011 05:28 AM

*hugs kitty* you really are not a failure, is there someone in real life you can talk to, like a psych or dr, or counsellor.
I'm sorry I need to try and sleep, its 4.30am here and I have to be up in 4 hours. I didn't take my night meds, which can help me sleep because they give me the most horrific nightmares, which have me waking up every few hours sweating and shaking and convinced its real, so I'm now stuck in insomnia.
please stay safe kitty *hugs*

PsychoKitty2010 16-01-2011 05:31 AM

-hugs oliver- Sleep well.

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