For some people it will be for the best if I went. Get me out of their lives and then they can stop hurting me.

Helen it would never be for the best. dont tihn about the people that hurt you, think about the people that care about you

But I keep getting hurt. I seem to attract hurt. I know I should think about the people who care about me, I am. But I keep thinking about the people who've hurt me for no reason.

honey those people aren't worth your thoughts. i believe in you, you can get through this. just dont give up

I know they're not worth my thoughts. Thanks for believing in me, even though I don't deserve that. I don't think I can get through this. I want to give up so much.

I was going to say something else, but my brain's forgotten for a moment. Hopefully it'll come back to me.

you do deserve it and yo ucan get through this. i know you can and somewhere in there you know you can too

I don't think I can say anything else.

I just wish I knew why I have to be like this. I wish I knew why people like hurting me. I wish I knew why I didn't get that scumbag into trouble. I wish I knew why people make me think people pretend to care/love about me. >.<

i wish i could answer those questions for you hun.. please just remember that i'm tihnking of you *cuddles lots*

I wish someone could you know? I know you're thinking of me and I appericate it so much. I really do. *hugs*

It's increadibly bad I've been saving up pills for this isn't it?

throw those pills out!!!
honey i have to go to class now but please take care!

I can't.

Okay sweetie. I should be fast asleep, but I'm too wide awake. Just hope I don't fall asleep on the way to/from uni today x

*runs to the corner, sits there and cries openly*

*hugs Helen* i would miss you incredibly you arent allowed to go!

*Hugs YodaBearInteruppted and hands over the box of tissues*

*hugs back*

Well, guess who wanted to make all her lectures this week? Me. Guess who's managed to oversleep all day and missed a lecture & tutorial? Me.

Grrrrrrrrr >.<

*hugs Helen*
Hon, I've survived 4 suicides. Of those, the first that passed away and the second were best friends. I'm still trying to cope with the first (and the others). I will never forget. And neither have/will the families and friends of any of them.

I'd really miss you Helen. Please don't go ....:crying:. I hope you get somewhere with the counselling ... I hope she is able to go through those initial views you've picked up and be helpful to you.

*thinking of you and sending "you can ge through this" vibes*

*hugs Kahlia*

I'm sorry to hear about your best friends and the two people :(

I have to go.

Thanks for thinking of me & your vibes.

*hugs Kahlia*

*hugs Helen* tommorow is a brand new day, get to all your lectures starting from then

I.can't.do.this.anymore.I.just.CAN'T

*Hugs Manda* whats wrong honey?

Oh I will do :)

Cus tomorrow could very well be decision day =\

*hugs tight*

I miss my mum :(

*hugs zowie loads*

*hugs zowie Helen and Manda*

*hugs some more*

Scarrrrrrred :(

*gives Helen a massive squeeze* whats wrong honey?

Scared about tomorrow.
Scared about being caught.
Scared about how much people are going to hurt.
Scared that I will go out on wedsnesday night (its a possibility) having put my plan into action and being an utter fool of myself (like I dont already?)

Pathetic.

Ignore me if you want :)

*hugs tight*

*sits in her corner -hey it's still here!- with a box of tissues and some orange juice*
A month without one of my meds, a cold, AND I'm hormonal :pinch:. Miss me? lol

*sets a box of germ-free hugs in the middle of the room*

Sorry guys, no time to catch up now :-( Love you all

*hugs u loads*

*hugs Helen loads* Don't do anything i wouldnt approve of you hear :P

*hugs you loads back*

Haha. =\

*huggles everyone*

Just wanted to pop on and give everyone *hugs*.
And, i wanted to ramble, for no particular reason..just to get things off my chest.

I can't stand leeches. The type who drain you, the type who constantly crave attention, it makes me want to bang my head repeatedly against a brick wall.
I just wish they would look at others around them, and realise that there are other people in this world other than themselves.
I'd like to think that despite my low times, despite on occasion being self centered, that i actually take the time out to listen and give support/advice to others around me suffering.
I'm so utterly paranoid about being a leech - that's why i rarely open up, or rely on anyone, or constantly go on about my wishes to die - because i know if someone was to do that to me, i'd feel gutted, and emotionally drained.

Sometimes it's necessary to wallow in your own self pity, right?
But other times, i just wish people would think of other people other than themselves.

Meh.

And.
I wish i could swap families.
Wouldn't that be fantastic?

Anyway.
Lots of support going out to people who need it.
xx

*huggles* thinking of you xx

*huggles soph and laura*

I wonder if I'm a leech now after reading that lol.

you're not a leech helen *hugs*

i am. delted my post. gotta go. byes.

You're Not A Leech Jess!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I.




Give.






Up.

No Alexx :(
I won't let you.
What's happening?

And you're not a leech Jess, at all

everything....too much...i just cant >< *cries*

*cuddles lots* i dont know what i can say to help but i'm thinking of you..

*group cuddle*

You CAN. I know you can.
Is there anything you wanna talk about?

*huggles*

*panicks* i have a test in 50min. i havent studied at all. i dont know any of the stuff the test is on. aargh!!

****. i have an exam tomorrow. **** **** ****. i dont care anymore.

uhhhhhhhhhh.
its just all gone so wrong ><
my ex is stalking me.
the guy i like...SAYS he likes me...but doesnt show it...
Im out from 7am til 11pm...and somehow my mum expects me to clean up and do my ironing.
she just called me an "inconsiderate selfish bitch" who is "****ing out of order" because i was trying to QUIETLY dry my hair....and all i wanted to do was grab the nearest sharpest object and do some serious damage to her because in short...im a horrible horrible person and i hate her for not aborting me as much as she hates herself for not doing the same.
im pushing everyone away from me
and everyday...i want to hurt just that little bit more...

*hugs everyone tight*

You can do this Alexx, I believe in you sweetie :)

*cuddles* try to do a bit of study for your exam, ignore your mom because youre not a selfish bitch or horrible, stay away from your ex and call the police if neccessary and try to take care *huggles lots*

That is one long day.
Anyway.
Have you looked over what you need to know for tomorrow?
Does anyone know that you're being stalked? It might be worth telling someone to get him off your back.
You're NOT a horrible person. You didn't hurt her, so something stopped you. She sounds a bit harsh, you don't really have much time!
(I'm glad she didn't)
Pushing everyone away seems like the right thing to do at the time...but believe me it just makes people worry more. *cuddles*

No, No.
My post wasn't aimed at anyone on here.
It was about a family member.
People need to stop taking things so personally.
I probably should have mentioned it was a family member beforehand - however, i shouldn't have to, as it's just ramblings/a vent on what's on my mind.

Why would i come here and say that if it was about someone in this thread?
If i had something to say to someone i'd go to them directly on here, because i'm not a two-faced sort of person.

So i'd appreciate it if people stopped making me feel guilty over me just venting over something i'm upset about.

All I'm Living For - Goodluck in your test hun. *Big hugs*

Ive looked over it. But its abit pointless. Ill fail anyway.
Im gonna get ill anyway..because I have to go to bed with wet hair and its really bothering me...I think...Im starting to panic because of it :(
I want to hurt her. She hurts me. Not physically anymore. But still mentally.
I try to be good. I try to be nice.
Im bad for people.
Bad.Bad.Bad.
ill go now...