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MammaMia 11-10-2008 11:28 PM

Kahlia, well we think the spider has gone through a crack in the walls and run off. I just hope it doesn't enter my room again, it was horrible :( Still no tears. My eyes keep stinging/burning like it's going to happen. But nope, no fricking tears =\


Kahlia1981 11-10-2008 11:32 PM

Helen, I've just started crying again. I seriously think I must be crying for you. I just wish I knew how to make it stop and n*o*t start up again.
Fingers crossed that it doesn't take too long for you to be able to cry.

*hugs back*

MammaMia 11-10-2008 11:36 PM

*hugs back*

Can I just have your tears? Please? :D I wouldnt mind crying for days on end.....

Kahlia1981 11-10-2008 11:46 PM

I think that would suit both of us at this point in time. This whole not being able to stop crying thing is driving me nuts. Yes I know, short trip, at least I'll save on petrol.

*passes tears over to Helen*

MammaMia 11-10-2008 11:47 PM

*hugs you loads*

I hope I start crying soon ROFL

Yay I see Emma tomorrow :]

shadowedseraph 12-10-2008 09:16 AM

*hugs Helen and Kahlia* How are people today?

MammaMia 12-10-2008 01:03 PM

*hugs you and Kahlia*

My headache kills. My sleeping is ****ed. My emotions are out of control. What hope do I have?

Thankfully I see Emma (yes from here!) today woop woop :hop:

Kahlia1981 12-10-2008 02:10 PM

*hugs both of you back*

I hope I sleep tonight .... I didn't sleep last night.
I'm scared I'm going to start cutting when my friend leaves. This might make no sense but last night when he told me he was planning to leave so early I felt like I was dying inside. It feels like there is no point to trying not to hurt myself when he leaves. Like I'll be losing his support and encouragement. I just .... I don't know.

I've actually had a bit of relief from my downer today. I was able to smile and laugh. Not all day, but at least for a bit of it. And now I'm back down again.
... and dying inside again. ... Meh.

*hugs anyone that wants or needs hugs and offers chocolate*

MammaMia 12-10-2008 02:13 PM

*hugs you loads*

I hope you sleep tonight darling, I was up until nearly 5am making stuipd plans :blink:

I wish I knew what to say to help.....

shadowedseraph 12-10-2008 02:17 PM

*hugs you both* mm chocolate
Hope you both get some sleep tonight and manage to try and have stress free days

MammaMia 12-10-2008 02:26 PM

*is panicking about being ready for Em, even tho I dont hve a clue what time she's getting me?*

Kahlia1981 12-10-2008 02:43 PM

*hugs both of you*

Helen, I hope you and Emma have a good time. Enjoy your time together. :-)

I just opened a box holding a necklace and nearly burst into tears! It was really weird. The necklace is a Victorian Touch Wood and if I was to wear it most people would think it was an image of The Magic Pudding. (I don't know if any of you have even heard of either of the above.) My sister gave it to me years ago. I don't know why I was almost in tears though ..... odd. Maybe just because of how I've been lately.

There have been an awful lot of bushfires around here lately and I keep coughing. So over it.

Meh. Anyway I need to try and get some sleep.

*hugs everyone*

shadowedseraph 12-10-2008 02:51 PM

*hugs Kahlia and offers her the box of tissues Hugs Helen* didnt she say between 3 and 4 the other day?

Pomegranate 12-10-2008 03:04 PM

Picking you up at 4ish my darling (as in I am aiming for four but you know what my time keeping is like). Don't worry about being ready :) xxx

MammaMia 12-10-2008 03:07 PM

Thanks sweetheart :)

*hugs you loads*

MammaMia 12-10-2008 03:08 PM


Originally Posted by Pomegranate (Post 1146499)
Picking you up at 4ish my darling (as in I am aiming for four but you know what my time keeping is like). Don't worry about being ready :) xxx

I do know what your time keeping is like and I so know you're going to drive past my house again :wow:

I'm eating some food now- can't wait til you pick me up haha!!

Pomegranate 12-10-2008 03:11 PM

Me too! See you soon :). Not go time to eat though so will require food at Wetherspoons otherwise I will be very grumpy :P x

MammaMia 12-10-2008 03:12 PM

That's fine dearest, see you in a bit xxx

zowie 12-10-2008 04:38 PM

Hi all. Brighton meet was great! Feeling good today, might go down the pub x

shadowedseraph 12-10-2008 07:41 PM

Hey zowie, glad the brighton meet was good

MammaMia 12-10-2008 09:37 PM


Me & Emma simply cannot park in this one car park!!!

*cracks up laughing*

Kahlia1981 12-10-2008 09:40 PM

I am so over this not really sleeping thing. I barely slept last night. Most of the night I was lying there and I kept thinking of how I'm going to cope once my friend leaves. Then it started raining. At least then I could switch my mind to something else.

I want to scream. :Undecided: Sooner or later I think this is going to kill me.

*tries to find somewhere solitary where no-one will be bothered by the noise*
*screams while stuffing her hands in her mouth*

MammaMia 12-10-2008 10:03 PM

*comes and sits with you*

Can I give up now? No...two more days....what am I expecting? some miracle? cus it aint gonna happen...

Kahlia1981 12-10-2008 10:14 PM

Helen, I would tell you that you can give up if I can give up ... but I know that would come back to bite me at some point. I really hope things improve for you.

:notsure: I'm a bit scared at the moment. Normally I remember everything that happens when I'm down and only forget the high stuff. Apparantly though I was sitting at my friends house the other day with a stanley knife in my hand. I don't remember doing it. I haven't hurt myself but if I'm losing track of things while I'm down it could happen.

I see my pdoc tomorrow. Somehow I don't think this is going to be a fun session ...

MammaMia 12-10-2008 10:18 PM

Things won't improve.

It's almost final, just got to settle on a few detials.

Okay I shouldn't say that though.

Emma will hate me :]

But I feel ok for talking to her. But I still feel suidical...which is fine :) Cus I'm getting the hell outta here soon :D

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 01:26 AM

*hides in cupboard*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 01:28 AM

Everything ok Soph?

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 01:31 AM

there hasnt been any updates on Kate for a few days now. i'm scared.

MammaMia 13-10-2008 01:47 AM

I know it's scary hun, but as they say no news is good news....

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 01:51 AM

in this case though i dont think it is. Carey doesnt like giving the bad news so if Kate wasn't doing so well i dont know if she would post it..

MammaMia 13-10-2008 01:54 AM

Well you never know hun. *snuggles*

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 01:56 AM


MammaMia 13-10-2008 01:59 AM

Try not to worry hun, I know it's hard *hugs tight*

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:05 AM

it is hard... *hug sback*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:07 AM

*hugs back* She'll suprise you all soon, I'm sure of it :)

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:09 AM

i hope so, i really do..

i'm sorry for being so selfish. how are you?

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:14 AM

She will hunnie :)

You're not selfish, I promise. I'm not in a good way.


All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:18 AM

Is there anything i can do to help?

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:20 AM

Knock some sense into me?

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:23 AM

Why do you need some sense knocked into you?

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:25 AM

Because I'm being pathetic. I'm suidical. I'm making plans. >.<

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:29 AM

*knocks some sense into you*
Get some help woman!! And in that I mean get some help to keep you alive!!

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:31 AM

I may be starting some counselling on Tuesday. Depends if she can be bothered to see me or not...

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:39 AM

if she cant see you find someone else! you're not allowed to die!!

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:43 AM

I can't see anyone else. As I don't have the money to pay. Why am I not allowed to die?

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 02:46 AM

because there are too many people who would miss you and care about you and dont want you to die!

MammaMia 13-10-2008 02:54 AM

Some would soon forget me. Trust me. Everyone would have to keep going without me. I wouldn't ever be coming back...

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 03:01 AM

Helen. I have lost a friend to suicide. Believe me, no one will forget. It's been just over 3 years since Alyssa died buy not a single person who knew her has forgotten. No one would forget you either. Just please don't die...

MammaMia 13-10-2008 03:13 AM

I wish I knew how to respond to that.

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 03:14 AM

Just don't die because people won't forget. And it will change their lives and not for the better.

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