Who needs sleep? Apparently not me. I'm so exhausted. Everything seems like an uphill battle these days. I just can't seem to get out of feeling so down and out. This sucks. ☹

What's sleep? I feel the same way you do... tired but not able to get sleep.

*hugs* I hope you feel better

Thanks Matt. *hugs* I hope you get some sleep.

Yesterday was exhausting. I may be adding 2 more therapies a week to my kids' schedule. Ugh. I am trying to write out everything going through my mind with everything going on right now but it just makes me feel like a shitty parent. It's perfectly ok to eat my feelings, right?

Hi everybody. Just a quick stop by. I'm alive and generally well. Hope things are improving for evevyone.

Hope everyone is doing alright. *offers hugs to those who need it*

Is life always so hard? Do we ever see the light at the end of the tunnel? Life is just really dragging me down. It's stressing me out even in my dreams and I'm on edge 24/7. People ask me how I manage, how I do it. I don't know but I'm hanging on by a very thin thread. I have no time for me and when I make time for me, it's hours after I should be in bed. If running away was an option I would do it...like yesterday.

Taking a holiday was probably one of the best things I did, but I forgot that when I get back, all my life issues are waiting for me. Hahaha. Oh life, you so fickle.

The last couple of weeks have been crazy with the start of the university term. Last Thursday was Orientation all day and both Tuesday and Wednesday this week were lectures/tutorials/workshops....

Can I collapse now and sleep for a few days? Between the pain situation and my having to deal with people I'm exhausted.

*safe hugs for anyone who wants/needs them*
*crawls into my pillow fort to curl up and get some sleep*

I don't know when I last felt this low. It's all so overwhelming and I feel so done with it all. The thoughts creeping into my head are not safe.

*curls up with her blanket* I want to just stay like this for a little while...or forever. Haven't decided yet.

Hi everyone, hope you are all doing okies *hugs to all*

Haven't been in here for awhile... but really struggling right now with everything and not being safe

*hides in the corner* I hope things get better :(

Hey Matt.

*hugs to anyone who needs one*

Life is just so crazy. I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know how I'm going to make it through. Just want to break down and cry.

Hi people. Hope the reason it's quiet is cos everyone's doing well. I on the other hand, am teetering. Not quite unwell yet, but if one more thing happens, I think I may become unstable.
I just don't fit anywhere anymore.
Hugs for those who want them

Cuddles up with blanket and a book. Feeling Lethargic this week, and just want to be alone and not worry about others feelings. I am overwhelmed with my own depression and can't seem to make room to help anyone else.

Hugs back. Hope you feel okay today. I feel the teetering as well. Ill be checking back tonight to see if anyone replies to this thread. XXOO

Mornings are the worst. Can we just vote to eliminate mornings?

Can we keep the wake up and stretch part of mornings? I like that part. I'm not awake enough to really think about anything. Give me the first 15 minutes of morning and then we can skip the rest!

I'm really struggling the last day or two. I can't make heads or tails of how I feel. Sad, mad, frustrated. I feel like my parents betrayed me. My childhood was a lie and I don't know what other secrets they have decided to keep from me. Just really having a hard time processing everything. Hubby's at work and I've got to figure out how to adult when I really don't want to.

Boo! I'm definitely struggling. My quality of sleep is crap which makes everything worse. I've chosen the wrong career for someone who's sleep pattern is pivotal to maintaining reality connection.
They are noticing it at work. I'm not sure I'll manage to pass this grad year.
Thanks for the nice thoughts.

I'm sorry you're struggling with sleep, Eir. I hope it gets better for you.

I need a safe place to maybe color or paint. Maybe even just to curl up and nap. At what point do you just give up fighting for what's important? My kids are everything to me. They are struggling majorly and I've been fighting for them. It's so exhausting though. It's ruining my health trying to make sure they don't suffer like me. I'm just... sigh... at the end of my rope. I can't keep fighting and losing, thus failing them. I just can't. :'(

*hugs*
I can't answer that. But I believe that running ourselves into the ground will not help those we care for. It actually makes it harder to do what we need for them. I'm a bit of a hypocrite, I tend to wear myself thin and ignore my own needs until I start falling to pieces.
I'm a bit low. And struggling to focus on things.

I'm back. Need a quiet place to get over the sensory overload going on in my house. I'm ready for a nap. A nice long nap. I may snap long before a nap is possible though.

huggles to everyone! actually just stopped by to check in and let everyone know that theres hope and people do care...ive struggled for over 29 years, and am finally finding myself in a place in life where life seems to be finally getting easier and less stressful, and thankfully the people in my life now are less judgmental more supportive more caring and genuinely want me around...so please dont give up? keep trying, and hopefully your happy place will come soon too

Does anyone have experience with dealing with intrusive thoughts? My usual tricks aren't working.

The only thing I remember being taught about dealing with intrusive thoughts is to say the word 'stop' every time they come into your head. That can get a bit tiring and go on for a while though but it's something to try if you haven't tried it already. Do you know why your usual techniques don't seem to be helping right now?

Same. I don't have any tricks though except to distract myself with other thoughts until they go away.

Hello everybody. I'm an oldbie returning on a new account. Nobody knows me though, haha.

Probably exhaustion. I definitely think I need to talk to my manager about my roster.
I'll try that, but I'm on shift right now. Thankyou

hello there everyone. Hugs and coffee to those that need them. With respect to intrusive thoughts I d try grounding techniques and maybe a bit of meditation to clear my mind. Hope this helps :)

Hi all.

After having spent another 6 weeks in hospital and another full week at home I'm about ready to give up. Just so tired and struggling to stay safe. *sigh* Not to mention I've realised that I've spent 5 months in hospital this year.

On a positive note, the TMS (Trans-cranial Magnetic Stimulation for anyone who hasn't heard of it) was successful and I can fit 3 to 6 month top-ups into my schedule. The last lot was sabotaged by the doctor so my next round will probably be a bit early and I have to be hospitalised for close to 4 weeks for the treatment, but it's better than nothing and I don't have to leave town for it.

Now I just have to fit my treatment around uni and retake the subjects I was trying to do before I was hospitalised. Oh, and organise to find a doctor within the hospital who will be willing to take me on so I can avoid the p**** I had this last time. *sigh*

*hugs to anyone who wants/needs them*

I'm just going to go and curl up in my pillow fort...

Why is it that, at the ripe old age of 32, with 3 hospitalisations under my belt, some very helpful therapy and a degree that gives me insight into the necessity of being honest with those in the medical professionals and those in your support network, that I still minimise my symptoms?
New medication regime. Let's see how this goes.
*Cookies for all*

*safe hugs*

Annie: Good luck with the new meds.

One more day of hiding how I'm doing from my husband. So tired of fighting. *sigh*

I know this is a really hard time of year for a lot of us so...

*hugs to anyone who wants/needs them*

I'm sorry that I cannot do more.

It’s quiet in here, *goes and makes a cuppa* I’m an oldie, I ran away as I was being triggered too much but I’m a lot stronger now, been free of SI for 7 years now me thinks, just wanted to say hi, having a shitty day. Got Pilates later though, I like Pilates...

Hugs and fluffy bunnies for all. Unless you're Anyanka. Then no bunnies.
Struggling again

Been awhile. I can feel myself spiraling downhill. I am stressing so much. The thoughts in my head aren't good.

So for now I'll curl up with my blanket and cup of coffee.

*sigh* So tired. Still waiting on TMS treatment...

Sorry to hear that things aren't so good Annie, Kat and wildly insane (can I call you Hannah?). I hope they improve.

Yes, yes, Hannah is good, all good here, sounds tough Kahila, hope they don’t keep you waiting much longer.
Anna, how are you? Fancy another cuppa? Do you want to chat about it?

I feel like my head is full of cotton wool. I'm distracted to the point of being referred to the risk management team. I'm on meds, so if I feel like this with them I don't know what I'd be like without them. Maybe I'd be in the middle of an episode.
I've got two weeks off. That scares me. And I don't really know why.
Thank you Hannah, Kahlia and Kat.

Have you discussed changing meds with anyone, maybe they're not the right ones?
Is there anything you want to do during your two weeks off which you can focus on? are there little things on a day by day basis you can do and keep yourself busy?

Hey guys, sorry, i've not read up, I don't think I have it in me right now.
I used to frequent here a few years ago, but haven't been in for a while.
Hope everyone's doing as well as they can be.

I've got a booking with my psychiatrist for the first time since 2007. At the end of May. Downside of living 3 hrs away from a major city.
My GP is reluctant to adjust them. I think I'm close to the max dose of one, and intrusive thoughts are still a daily struggle. Other symptoms are relatively controlled. But if the distraction continues we might have to do something drastic. I can't function at work like this.
Dad's surgery has been postponed a fortnight. So no aloneness for my vacation.
Hug for bang ended scoot. And thanks for the kindness Hannah

Sounds tough Eir, May is a long time to struggle through, I hope your go can help.

Bangendedscoot, hang in there and if you want to talk we’re listening.

Haven't been here for a while. Have been doing okay for the past few months but tonight I feel terrible. First time in a while I have had to fight with the Voices and other things. Trying really hard not to do something bad like hurt myself, but it is very difficult right now. Hard to resist. Going to try yo take my meds and write in my journal and hopefully fall asleep soon. Until then I will just sit in here.

hey everyone :)

Struggling.
Wanna hide here. Wish it was real.
Don't like my reality.

Not having a great evening and having a hard time..
Just want to run away from all the pain and the chaos in my head. Going to sit here and hope it gets better

*Waves*
My life is turning sour. But im not hurting myself yet.
I hope everyone else is doing ok.

Hey everyone. I’m turning 30 this week and am scared because I’ve done nothing with my life. :( it all seems to be a mess. I’m physically ill, mentally ill and unable to do things by myself. I didn’t envision 30 in a wheelchair. Then again I don’t think anyone does.
Hope everyone is good x

I'm over these headaches. I am so tired. I go to sleep at night and wake up still exhausted. Stress may kill me. People ask me how I do it all. I honestly don't know. I manage for now. Ask me tomorrow after I throat punch someone for telling me something I already know doesn't work for my kid. I've been doing nothing but fighting for her for months. Nobody is listening. What more do I need to do to get these doctors to take my concerns seriously and actually do something about it all?

Life is hard. Adulting is hard. Nobody ever told me as a kid things would be so tough.

I want to just sleep. For as long as possible and wake up to everything being okay. *sigh*

Hi all.

I've finally had my TMS treatment and come home from hospital again but have a traumatic memory returning so I'm crawling in to find some place that isn't terrifying.

psychadelicflowergirl: I only went into a wheelchair about 2 years ago but I definitely didn't envision it happening... ever in fact.

*sigh* Right now I'd just take being able to be in a darkened room without completely freaking out, but that doesn't seem like it will happen any time soon.

*curls up in the corner*

🤗 Kahlia

Oh I just wish I could let all the emotions out but I know I can’t without hurting everyone....

Anyone up for some company? I need a distraction. Life is overwhelming. I'm trying to juggle everything and failing miserably.

Hey :) I was a member here a loooong while ago (apparently I last posted in 2009) It took a little while and a bit of searching to remember my username (thank you introductions threads) but now I can log in as me again and say hello.