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RYUU 11-09-2010 10:14 PM

Today has just been a day of emotions i was happy this morning even looked up Japanese pop music and having a laugh with my husband then we started to talk about going away for the week and food there and my mood changed
we are going for a wedding and i know am going to be the fattiest person there it will be embarrassing for my husband having me there
now am just focusing on the food that i have been eating and the calories that is in them

Doikers 11-09-2010 10:14 PM

*Hugs Felicia* I'm sorry you are so very low , please look after your cuts and yourself . I'm here if you need to talk .

*Hugs Lindsay* Living with a mental illness is so tough but it has peaks and troughs and it sounds to me that you are in a trough but you WILL bounce out of it . I feel like a bit of a hypocrite but life is worth it in the end :)

*Hugs Reaper/Ryuu* I'm sorry you cut , please take good care of it .

shadowedsoul 11-09-2010 10:28 PM

Cuddles all, thanks Lindsay just wish I could get the words to explain how I'm feeling and why I'm feeling like this. Damn it I'm really triggered and I hurt so much right now, just want to find a way to get completely out of it and feel numb right now. Had enough of this. Sorry

Doikers 11-09-2010 10:57 PM

*Spots and squishes April* How are you this afternoon?

Right off to bed with me ,I'm not tired but I'm a bit triggered and "Asleep is the safest place you can be"

MammaMia 12-09-2010 12:09 AM

I feel sick AGAIN :'( Arrrgh!

MammaMia 12-09-2010 02:09 AM

*hides and sobs her heart out*
Sorry to double post.

SoMuchMore 12-09-2010 05:57 AM

*cuddles helen tight* i'm sorry that you are feeling sick again. Don't be sorry about the double post, its been a very quiet evening in here. you alright hun?

*hugs mark* yes there was another american football game today. we are looking pretty good this season. Hope you are sleeping well, sorry to hear that you were triggered today.

*hugs reaper* please take care of your wound. I'm sorry that you cut.

*hugs felicia* i'm sorry that you are feeling stranded, but yes sometimes all you can do is resolve to make it through the day. I hope that you are alright. Sorry that you harmed this morning, please try to take good care of it.

*hugs jill* im sorry things arent going well for you right now. we are here to listen if you ever feel like talking.

*hugs lindsay* I hope that you did not OD hun. You ARE strong enough to make it through this though. I really believe that.

*hugs heather* I'm sorry that you have so limited time online right now. I hope you are doing okay hun.

*hugs hayley* good to see you around! Hope the rest of your day went okay. Sorry that you feel you have to keep a brave face on with Eoghan

*cuddles everyone else* sorry if i missed you. I tried to get everyone on the last two pages.

Whew I am exhausted. Had a pretty decent day today, yet I still got triggered on and off for no reason... how stupid is that? damn. O well I suppose. I'm about to head out again. i'll catch up more tomorrow!

risenfromperdition 12-09-2010 07:03 AM

never fun to be triggered for no reason =[

ergh am huge... scale says so and clothes all yucky and =[

Doikers 12-09-2010 10:29 AM

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Laura*I Hate it when I'm triggered for no apparent reason too , so frustrating:S

*Hugs Helen* I'm sorry you feel ill:(

Doikers 12-09-2010 10:54 AM

*Spots Julie and Hugs* How are you today Julie?

MammaMia 12-09-2010 01:02 PM

I feel so low and hurting. I don't know how to cope over next 3 weeks or so. I'm so so so so worried about one best friend. She's back in hospital and still struggling mentally. I'm trying to help, but I'm struggling to do that. My other best friend isn't going to be round much until I go see her. I would normally turn to her about everything & now I can't. I don't know what to do :'( I just want to harm, run until I can't run and just die :'(

Doikers 12-09-2010 01:27 PM

*HUGS Helen*

MammaMia 12-09-2010 01:36 PM

*hugs Mark* Thank you hun x

one_step_closer 12-09-2010 01:57 PM

*hugs everyone*

MammaMia 12-09-2010 01:58 PM

*hugs Lindsay* How you doing?

one_step_closer 12-09-2010 03:55 PM

I don't really know. Wanting to cut and overdose and just get out of life for a while.

How are you, Helen?

RYUU 12-09-2010 04:22 PM

* hugs everyone *

Voices are loud telling me to kill myself

Doikers 12-09-2010 04:52 PM

*Hugs Lindsay* I SO know the feeling of wanting to be out of it but ODing is SO very dangerous as S.I. can be too . Please be safe Lindsay ..

*Hugs Ryuu* Don't listen to those voices , their opinions are worth less than nothing you are stronger than them . Could you do something to distract yourself perhaps?, go for a long walk somewhere safe or listen to music really loud. You certanly don't deserve to die .

*Hugs Helen*

SparkleKitten 12-09-2010 05:45 PM

*hugs everyone*

Just got in after my Saturday out, there was a huge row with mum in the morning and in a blind fit of rage I attacked the kitchen units, bruised my arm and hands up. Don't remember doing it so I must have been really angry.

My time out however was the exact opposite of my time in. Lovely and calm, read a book, made a cat out of clay, just general nice things. Bought some sweets today.

Got a meds question, might go see a pharmacist tomorrow, doctor told me to double my dose, so take 2 tablets instead of 1, but I don't know if she meant at once or spaced out like leaflet says for other problems, and I was too bewildered and overwhelmed to ask at the time. *sigh*

Edit - after a glance on Google it turns out that they're made in double strength tablets (so the equivalent of 2 of mine) in other countries but not in the UK. Oh what would I do without the internet :p

MammaMia 12-09-2010 05:53 PM

Can I die now?

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