*Smokes and hugs Hayley*

*hugs all*

*sits in the corner*

I don't want to go to the psych... blah. *huggles to everyone in here*

i'm fed up...
i'm tired i'm run down i can't talk
i can't say whats wrong
the past is coming back with me and i hate it
suppose meet will be good tomorow :)
11 of us going so its all cool

but i still feel all shitty. i wanna scream

oh yeh i wanna cut but yet have not done it in 4 months nearly

*wishes she give you all hugs but doesn't want to pass whatever she's got onto you all*

Thanks for the hugs though Hayley :) It's a wonder I've not fallen into dehydration again (was VERY dehydrated on thursday) from all the crying. Have cried today, but not so much which is a start righht???

<runs into denial tent and says everything's finnnnnnne>

i'll probably end up crying by the nights over and crying by annoy me greatly i'm sick and tired of everything going on. i just want at least one good thing to happen supposably it will be tomorow where i can show my fake smiles off to a good lot of people...!!!!! college show round tomorow and i'm scared shitless...

*hugs haley* thanks for the huggles sweetheart i hope you are keeping ok!

*hugs MamaMia* i'm not afraid of your germs :)

*hugs lolly_x* 4 months nearly without cutting is a huge acheivement you should be proud ! i'm sure you'll manage the college tour thing just take deep breaths and tell yourself you can do this (hypocrit i know)

Not official/legal name change. Just feels like who I used to be's faded away/died/whatever, so I call mysel Tödlich now. Seems more fitting. Not been spacey today thankfully, but super depressed instead. Bleck D:

*Safe hugs to Kx and everyone else in the ward*

*sends safe hugs to everyone she can find*

I see that a bunch of people aren't doing too great today, so before I send another round of hugs, love, and positive energy, I want to share part of a letter I received from a very dear friend today. I put it in a new thread in the distractions board, but I don't know if all of you look there, so I'll cross-post it here. I feel as though it applies to everyone, not just the youngsters on their way to adulthood, and not just people who SH, but those who just struggle to reach the dawn of each new day.

Growing up in this dangerous world is full of surprises, and is a very difficult thing.
How will you ever live up to the promise of what the future holds? You've shown by example that you will overcome life's obstacles, and you are growing up to be the wonderful person that you should be.

I encourage you to accept every challenge with hope and strength, and to always do your best. Set goals. Be truthful to others and yourself, and try to forgive. Through love you will live and move on. Take on adventures with your chin lifted and your eyes open wide. To steady the journey, enjoy the ride and not just the destination. Seek passion, love, inner beauty, and self acceptance. Keep dreams and loved ones close to your heart.

Please celebrate failures with just one more try. I promise you can do anything you set your mind to. Be in control. Remember all the great things in life that money can't buy. Give back to the earth more than you take. A radiant smile from you is all that anyone asks.

Through heartbreak, pain, and experience you will be able to learn from everything, and help others as well. Be childlike, laugh often, and never turn back. Feel free to cry whenever you need to. Tears are the heart's way of bringing relief. No one will ask questions when you've made up your mind. Keep your foot firmly on the ground. Listen to your heart, and you will never go wrong. Above all, remember that love never dies.

Then at the end, as you walk your last mile, looking back on your life with a well-earned smile ... Recall all the faces that helped light the way. Give thanks for their love, and remember each day that you are unique & loved very much. You may not believe it, but someone is always thinking of you, and hoping you're alright. If you have doubts, please think of me. You share my passions, dreams, and love of life. Keep that smile on your face that I love, and never change who you are for anyone or anything. You are special just because you are you, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I just wanted you to know that I care, and you have my love. Thank you for being you, and remember:
you will always have my shoulder to cry on, my ears to listen, and my heart to care.


And now, I send you all my love, give everyone several *MASSIVE HUGS*, and send all the positive energies I have (which after reading that letter, is a LOT of positivity) and leave a large tray of sweets and pastries, and several pots of various kinds of tea and hot chocolate. There's a pile of fresh pillows and blankets under the serving table for anyone who wants them.

Be safe, be strong, and know that I love you all dearly.:kiss: :satisfied:

Thanks for sharing Jazz :)

I'm going to see Harry Potter today. Woop!

Hope everyone's okay.
*Leaves hugs for everyone*
xx

thanks for the hugs hayley. hmm really treid to stay safe, didnt happen tho, and now were i cut is a mess again. not sure what set it all off, no matter what i did that day. it went wrong.from things going wrong at work, noithing would go right that day. hugs jazz,that made me smile,thank you hun.

I'm sooooooooo bored out of my skull of being ill :'[

*hugs jazz* thats lovely :) whoever wrote that must be a dear friend

*hugs zowie* you'll have to tell me what its like it looks awesome

*hugs shadowedsoul* we all slip up and having a bad day is trigger enough, keep trying though *more hugs*

*hugs MammaMia* I know that feeling well

argh!!!! i cant do this tonight im so stressed, goes to a corner puts a blanket over my head and hide, starts shaking. im not here, jill not here.

*hugs everybody* me, busy busy bee and tired, shattered. Just found out today I have another interview, on the same day as the one I already have - doh. Sorry so many people can't individual reply to everyone as I've been gone for a few days but I really want to hug you all and hope that things get better, take care guys :)

Harry Potter was good. Obviously not as good as the book, but it was pretty true to it. Little bit rushed.

I'm desperate for a drink. I just bought a bottle of wine, but I have a new rule that I'm not allowed to drink unless someone is drinking with me.
I may have to break the rule...

*hugs all*

Sorry for the lack of individual replies, but I'm typing one-handed.

** knocks **

can i come in? :notsure: