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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

SoMuchMore 15-09-2009 05:31 AM

*hugs everyone* sorry no individual replies right now but i want you all to know i have read...

I feel there is something ironic and a bit scary about the fact that I have to go get briefed at a psychiatric unit tomorrow about how to handle those with psychiatric disorders. I'm super nervous... esp since the head of psychiatry at the hospital will be talking to all of us who are working for the study individually, i feel like i'm getting screened or something...

Kahlia1981 15-09-2009 07:13 AM

*hugs everyone*

I had another event with the crisis team today... They got my GP's letter asking for treatment by a pdoc and have decided that all I need is longterm counselling. I mean full marks for effort but also full marks for pissing me off. And they want the counselling to be done privately, once again showing that they are trying to get rid of me. Well I'm sorry crisis team I don't go away that easily and I will be a thorn in your side for a long time to come...

youonlyliveonce 15-09-2009 11:55 AM

hi sorry havent been around im inpatient at the mo and not got ne access to internet sorry. big hugs everyone xx

Kahlia1981 15-09-2009 01:46 PM

*hugs everyone*

I'm just going to go and sit and cry in a corner until I fall asleep and/or disappear....

ScarlettAngel 15-09-2009 02:05 PM

can i have a cuddle please? sorry i feel stupid for asking, but i need something.
i had my 20th bday 2 weeks ago, i didnt think id make it this far either zowie, in fact, last year the ICU nurses and doctors said that i wouldnt. but i did. and im scared. its like all of a sudden i have so much to live up to. im doing better now so people dont even notice me, im even gradually LOSING friends through my recovery. that doesnt make sense. even i had a slip up, no one even noticed.

i feel so alone again, i cant deal with this. i stopped my meds and stopped seeing psychs and stuff coz they werent helping. and i WONT go back!!! but i am still scared. im scared of recovery, of reality and of living the life everyone else expects me to live :(

zowie 15-09-2009 05:21 PM

*Cuddles ScarlettAngel*
I lost a lot of friends because I wasn't recovering. Now I'm in a good place they seem to have become too withdrawn to care. Is that what's happening, or are they actually drifting away because of your recovery? If that's the case, they aren't good friends at all - Yes, they may have been there for you when you were unwell, but what sort of friend loses interest when you start to get better?
I was scared too sweetie, and to be honest, I still am a little. But the fear passes when you start to realise how much nicer life can be without mental illness looming over you. I know how it feels, that MH has been part of you and mostly defined who you were and the way your life went. But it doesn't have to be that way. It takes time but once you can start to let go of the negative thoughts and feelings, and the hold that the illness has over you, you can start to enjoy life and see things in a better perspective.
*Cuddles again*
Take care hun

Steel Maiden 15-09-2009 05:40 PM

*hugs everyone*

Thank you for the kind words.

My Voices have gone into Kill Mode, might be getting my Haloperidol raised.

realflifefaerie 15-09-2009 05:52 PM

*leaves cuddles for all*
I'm really sorry I haven't being leaving individual replies, I'm too tired at the moment. I'd forgotten how hard it is to look after babies!

Outcast Angel 16-09-2009 12:55 AM

*checking in. Wish I could for real :(

Kahlia1981 16-09-2009 01:04 AM

*hugs everyone then retires to a corner for a cry and hopes she'll disappear*

Country Girl 16-09-2009 01:29 AM

*curling up in my corner to cry*
wish i could crawl in a corner for real....
just want to give up....

Kahlia1981 16-09-2009 02:14 AM

*cuddles Rach* ~ I know how you feel hon

*hugs everyone and curls up in a corner*

zowie 16-09-2009 01:48 PM

I'm in a good mood :)
I hope it lasts.
I think I'ma spend the day reading my book and drinking blackcurrant squash.
Will check back in during the day to see how everyone is.
Love n hugs

SoMuchMore 16-09-2009 03:14 PM

*hugs Rach*
*hugs Kahlia*
- hope you guys are both alright -
*hugs arwen* I hope your good mood lasts too! Have a fun/relaxing day!

I just want to give up. Tired of waiting for things to turn around. A friend is coming over tonight to talk to me, he feels bad that he didn't listen a few weeks ago when I said I needed to talk to someone. Thing is, I had a major breakdown then... and now I don't know if I even want to talk to him/anyone. It would be so much easier to just let myself fall apart.

frenchhorn 16-09-2009 04:14 PM

I'm so scared, I feel so low, cant keep going.

Country Girl 16-09-2009 06:48 PM

*continues to sit in the corner*
I think they are avoiding me....not that I blame them....but I do just really need to know they care about me....give me a reason to stay alive....it just hurts so much.....

Kahlia1981 17-09-2009 12:29 AM

*hugs Laura* ~ Thanks for caring.
*hugs Imogen* ~ I hope you can fight the low and come out on the other side
*hugs Rach*
*hugs Arwen* ~ I hope your good mood continues
*hugs everyone*

I feel really low. I've had a down mood for a couple of days now with no cause. Nothing has happened that has brought me down, and it's not related to thoughts.... I'm just low and when I get low I start thinking of suicide. I've made it through two nights and now I'm not sure what to do. I think I'll make an appointment with my GP as I don't have a pdoc as the crisis team doesn't think I need medication. I don't know what gave them that idea. I'm in a bad state when I'm not on medication... and they know that. They are just trying to interfere ....

SoMuchMore 17-09-2009 06:10 AM

*hugs everyone*

I'm so stupid, disgusting, irrational, ugly... need I go on?
*tries to disappear*

Kahlia1981 17-09-2009 06:45 AM

*hugs Laura* ~ Don't disappear hon, we love you here.
*hugs everyone*

I went and saw my GP today. He tried to find a cause for my down mood. He agreed with writing a letter to the Townsville Health Service District to complain about the crisis team. He gave me permission to have an extra lithium a day as long as I didn't have too many. He didn't really want to increase my lithium but has told me that if it gets worse to drop in and see him early next week, or to go to the hospital.

wildly insane 17-09-2009 08:55 AM

Hugs everyone feeling low and curled up in corners, keep fighting guys you are worth it and people do care.

*hugs Arwen* yay for a good mood I hope it stays

I am still hectically busy, I moved up last weekend and the next three weekends I'm away. The new job has started positively, I just need to go to bed earlier :P

hugs everyone again

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