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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

MammaMia 13-10-2008 04:22 AM

For some people it will be for the best if I went. Get me out of their lives and then they can stop hurting me.

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 04:24 AM

Helen it would never be for the best. dont tihn about the people that hurt you, think about the people that care about you

MammaMia 13-10-2008 04:29 AM

But I keep getting hurt. I seem to attract hurt. I know I should think about the people who care about me, I am. But I keep thinking about the people who've hurt me for no reason.

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 04:31 AM

honey those people aren't worth your thoughts. i believe in you, you can get through this. just dont give up

MammaMia 13-10-2008 04:36 AM

I know they're not worth my thoughts. Thanks for believing in me, even though I don't deserve that. I don't think I can get through this. I want to give up so much.

I was going to say something else, but my brain's forgotten for a moment. Hopefully it'll come back to me.

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 04:37 AM

you do deserve it and yo ucan get through this. i know you can and somewhere in there you know you can too

MammaMia 13-10-2008 04:42 AM

I don't think I can say anything else.

I just wish I knew why I have to be like this. I wish I knew why people like hurting me. I wish I knew why I didn't get that scumbag into trouble. I wish I knew why people make me think people pretend to care/love about me. >.<

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 04:44 AM

i wish i could answer those questions for you hun.. please just remember that i'm tihnking of you *cuddles lots*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 04:48 AM

I wish someone could you know? I know you're thinking of me and I appericate it so much. I really do. *hugs*

It's increadibly bad I've been saving up pills for this isn't it?

All I'm Living For 13-10-2008 04:49 AM

throw those pills out!!!
honey i have to go to class now but please take care!

MammaMia 13-10-2008 05:02 AM

I can't.

Okay sweetie. I should be fast asleep, but I'm too wide awake. Just hope I don't fall asleep on the way to/from uni today x

YodaBearInterrupted 13-10-2008 06:20 AM

*runs to the corner, sits there and cries openly*

shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 10:56 AM

*hugs Helen* i would miss you incredibly you arent allowed to go!

*Hugs YodaBearInteruppted and hands over the box of tissues*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 03:21 PM

*hugs back*

Well, guess who wanted to make all her lectures this week? Me. Guess who's managed to oversleep all day and missed a lecture & tutorial? Me.

Grrrrrrrrr >.<

Kahlia1981 13-10-2008 03:29 PM

*hugs Helen*
Hon, I've survived 4 suicides. Of those, the first that passed away and the second were best friends. I'm still trying to cope with the first (and the others). I will never forget. And neither have/will the families and friends of any of them.

I'd really miss you Helen. Please don't go ....:crying:. I hope you get somewhere with the counselling ... I hope she is able to go through those initial views you've picked up and be helpful to you.

*thinking of you and sending "you can ge through this" vibes*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 03:32 PM

*hugs Kahlia*

I'm sorry to hear about your best friends and the two people :(

I have to go.

Thanks for thinking of me & your vibes.

shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 05:04 PM

*hugs Kahlia*

*hugs Helen* tommorow is a brand new day, get to all your lectures starting from then

BoundNoMore 13-10-2008 05:33 PM


shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 06:13 PM

*Hugs Manda* whats wrong honey?

MammaMia 13-10-2008 06:38 PM

Oh I will do :)

Cus tomorrow could very well be decision day =\

MammaMia 13-10-2008 06:38 PM


Originally Posted by Bound by Thoughts (Post 1149319)

*hugs tight*

zowie 13-10-2008 06:42 PM

I miss my mum :(

MammaMia 13-10-2008 06:56 PM

*hugs zowie loads*

shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 07:27 PM

*hugs zowie Helen and Manda*

MammaMia 13-10-2008 07:31 PM

*hugs some more*

Scarrrrrrred :(

shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 08:08 PM

*gives Helen a massive squeeze* whats wrong honey?

MammaMia 13-10-2008 09:54 PM

Scared about tomorrow.
Scared about being caught.
Scared about how much people are going to hurt.
Scared that I will go out on wedsnesday night (its a possibility) having put my plan into action and being an utter fool of myself (like I dont already?)


Ignore me if you want :)

*hugs tight*

~*forever_broken*~ 13-10-2008 10:03 PM

*sits in her corner -hey it's still here!- with a box of tissues and some orange juice*
A month without one of my meds, a cold, AND I'm hormonal :pinch:. Miss me? lol

*sets a box of germ-free hugs in the middle of the room*

Sorry guys, no time to catch up now :-( Love you all

MammaMia 13-10-2008 10:52 PM

*hugs u loads*

shadowedseraph 13-10-2008 11:11 PM

*hugs Helen loads* Don't do anything i wouldnt approve of you hear :P

MammaMia 13-10-2008 11:39 PM

*hugs you loads back*

Haha. =\

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:03 AM

*huggles everyone*

Dramatic 14-10-2008 12:13 AM

Just wanted to pop on and give everyone *hugs*.
And, i wanted to ramble, for no particular reason..just to get things off my chest.

I can't stand leeches. The type who drain you, the type who constantly crave attention, it makes me want to bang my head repeatedly against a brick wall.
I just wish they would look at others around them, and realise that there are other people in this world other than themselves.
I'd like to think that despite my low times, despite on occasion being self centered, that i actually take the time out to listen and give support/advice to others around me suffering.
I'm so utterly paranoid about being a leech - that's why i rarely open up, or rely on anyone, or constantly go on about my wishes to die - because i know if someone was to do that to me, i'd feel gutted, and emotionally drained.

Sometimes it's necessary to wallow in your own self pity, right?
But other times, i just wish people would think of other people other than themselves.


I wish i could swap families.
Wouldn't that be fantastic?

Lots of support going out to people who need it.

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:17 AM

*huggles* thinking of you xx

MammaMia 14-10-2008 12:26 AM

*huggles soph and laura*

I wonder if I'm a leech now after reading that lol.

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:30 AM

you're not a leech helen *hugs*

Casper_Fading 14-10-2008 12:32 AM

i am. delted my post. gotta go. byes.

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:34 AM

You're Not A Leech Jess!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Detour. Derail 14-10-2008 12:34 AM




Kuwairo 14-10-2008 12:39 AM

No Alexx :(
I won't let you.
What's happening?

And you're not a leech Jess, at all

Detour. Derail 14-10-2008 12:40 AM

everything....too much...i just cant >< *cries*

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:43 AM

*cuddles lots* i dont know what i can say to help but i'm thinking of you..

Kuwairo 14-10-2008 12:45 AM

*group cuddle*

You CAN. I know you can.
Is there anything you wanna talk about?

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:48 AM


*panicks* i have a test in 50min. i havent studied at all. i dont know any of the stuff the test is on. aargh!!

Detour. Derail 14-10-2008 12:53 AM


Originally Posted by All I'm Living For (Post 1150501)

*panicks* i have a test in 50min. i havent studied at all. i dont know any of the stuff the test is on. aargh!!

****. i have an exam tomorrow. **** **** ****. i dont care anymore.

its just all gone so wrong ><
my ex is stalking me.
the guy i like...SAYS he likes me...but doesnt show it...
Im out from 7am til 11pm...and somehow my mum expects me to clean up and do my ironing.
she just called me an "inconsiderate selfish bitch" who is "****ing out of order" because i was trying to QUIETLY dry my hair....and all i wanted to do was grab the nearest sharpest object and do some serious damage to her because in short...im a horrible horrible person and i hate her for not aborting me as much as she hates herself for not doing the same.
im pushing everyone away from me
and everyday...i want to hurt just that little bit more...

MammaMia 14-10-2008 12:56 AM

*hugs everyone tight*

You can do this Alexx, I believe in you sweetie :)

All I'm Living For 14-10-2008 12:56 AM

*cuddles* try to do a bit of study for your exam, ignore your mom because youre not a selfish bitch or horrible, stay away from your ex and call the police if neccessary and try to take care *huggles lots*

Kuwairo 14-10-2008 12:57 AM

That is one long day.
Have you looked over what you need to know for tomorrow?
Does anyone know that you're being stalked? It might be worth telling someone to get him off your back.
You're NOT a horrible person. You didn't hurt her, so something stopped you. She sounds a bit harsh, you don't really have much time!
(I'm glad she didn't)
Pushing everyone away seems like the right thing to do at the time...but believe me it just makes people worry more. *cuddles*

Dramatic 14-10-2008 01:01 AM

No, No.
My post wasn't aimed at anyone on here.
It was about a family member.
People need to stop taking things so personally.
I probably should have mentioned it was a family member beforehand - however, i shouldn't have to, as it's just ramblings/a vent on what's on my mind.

Why would i come here and say that if it was about someone in this thread?
If i had something to say to someone i'd go to them directly on here, because i'm not a two-faced sort of person.

So i'd appreciate it if people stopped making me feel guilty over me just venting over something i'm upset about.

All I'm Living For - Goodluck in your test hun. *Big hugs*

Detour. Derail 14-10-2008 01:02 AM

Ive looked over it. But its abit pointless. Ill fail anyway.
Im gonna get ill anyway..because I have to go to bed with wet hair and its really bothering me...I think...Im starting to panic because of it :(
I want to hurt her. She hurts me. Not physically anymore. But still mentally.
I try to be good. I try to be nice.
Im bad for people.
ill go now...

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