RYL Forums

RYL Forums (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/index.php)
-   Self-Harm Discussion and Support (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=29)
-   -   Share your tips for staying SH free (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=3541)

Red Lotus. 30-05-2008 01:03 PM

I usually watch something or talk with my friends or even reading has really helped me.
Plus, i really want to get one of those RYL bracelets! :)


Auburn Shadow 03-06-2008 04:06 PM

I tend to open a word document and type and type until there's nothing left for me to say. Even if no-one sees it, it's out of my head for a while at least.

Recoveredandlovingit 03-06-2008 06:31 PM

I removed myself from stressful situations. If my parents were yelling i would simply tell them the truth. "I love you and i understand your frusteration but i simply cannont allow you to put me in this sort of issue any more." i would take walks and bring nothing along with me. yoga, breathing excersizes where i imagined exhaling my bad thoughts and bringing in good ones. i visited friends, called them. called my therapist. drew with chalk pastels where i removed dark colors. it seemed to help because my brain couldnt even imagine drawing something triggering. reading writing. simply sitting in the sun. playing in the dirt. i just did a lot of "grounding" techniques that made me feel like i belonged somewhere and that was mostly outside. climbing trees felt good. laying in the grass. screaming somewhere where no one could here you. my favorite thing to do was to go on a "picnic" with my younger sister. we would just get ham samwiches and carrots or apples and just sit in the front yard and eat and laugh. sometimes we would take chalks and chalk on the black top on the road. and taking a bath. but you really have to be careful to remove the stuff that you may want to use. it takes a lot of self control.
i just really wanted to feel happy and i think me pushing myself to forgive all i was hurt by helped me. in the begining of me trying to get better i thought it would be like an epiphany of me going "duh" just be happy. i found out that i really had to work hard. and i did and now looking back at where i was and where i am now i could not imagine going back to that constant darkness.


silverblackcat 12-06-2008 05:09 PM


I havn't self harmed for over a year now, and I was thinking about how I managed it and I realised it's basically because I got rid of the things that made me feel bad. I left school, broke up with my boyfriend and Im at Uni. I have no reason to anymore because the things that upset me have gone away. I'm happy now with my new life, I have nice friends and a wonderful boyfriend (Who's also self harmed in the past so he was very understanding when I told him I used to) and so on.

A good thing to do is to try to sort out what's making you feel the way you do, and try to tackle that problem so it won't hurt you anymore.

littlesheep 03-07-2008 08:10 AM

great idea

aquatickitten 04-07-2008 09:47 AM

it's silly, but i color on myself. actually i've created some real masterpieces...=] grab a box of washable watercolor markers and away you go. henna is awesome too, and gets less odd looks, but marker is much cheaper and easier to wash off. and very satisfying. when you really want to si, sometimes angrily drawing lines with a red marker helps. it's the same motion, at least for me, and the same color...

i've also gotten into burning incense. i like patchouli, though a lot of people don't! you can light incense, or a candle, though i like incense because it burns out and gives you something realistic to focus on. you just watch it until it burns out, and by then i've usually calmed down a bit.

music helps, too, as does this website. sometimes just getting out and doing something--going for a run with your dog or a walk in the park, just OUT and away from anything sharp for awhile.

most importantly...i'm sure everyone's heard this but you can't stop for someone else, because it won't work, not if you're really in deep. i tried. from the time i was 8 until the time i was 17, i tried to stop for other people. it wasn't until i woke up and saw what i was doing to my life that i even got to one month. take a good long look at your life. where do you want to be in 5 years? 10? Cutting isn't going to help with that, and it's easier to stop today than it will be tomorrow.

SoDark 09-07-2008 05:02 AM

4 months
I have had problems with self-injury for eight years now and I am proud to say that I am now 4 months free! The bracelets helped me. It felt good to wear them and know what they stand for.

The Mad Hatter 15-08-2008 08:44 PM

i think mainly what has helped me is to stay positive if i got down i would look at positive stuff like inspirational quotes not watch trigging stuff just keep busy mainly i think what mostly helped me is to is the inspiration i got from the quotes and videos i watched

sparky_jro 18-08-2008 01:28 AM

I have been SI free from 2 1/2 years ^_^, and here are some of my tricks, I hope to help.

I try to think logically, explain to myself very real reasons not to cut at that moment, for me it was so I wouldn't have to tell my BF that I did. Also, I found that I couldn't break promises when I made them, so I had my friends make me promise that I would tell them as soon as I did it, and if they couldn't get calls in the middle of the night, I would have to tell them within the day, I hate telling others, so this really helped deter me from SIing. I had one friend go as far as to tell me that if I SIed, he would SI as well, he had never done it before, but I cannot stand to see someone hurt, especially physically, so it scared me into not doing it for a good 3 months when I really needed it.
When you want to cut, you become illogical, it is all emotions, so if you can either switch your emotions away from yourself by making promises to others, or scaring yourself with someone elses pain, this will help take you away from the cravings. When you think logically, it switches you brain from one type of thinking to another, bringing you away from the cravings.
To fight this, I will repeat over and over again, "I AM strong, I CAN do this, I WILL do this" Not "I think I can", make them definite, it brings your thoughts back to positive, and doing logical things also helps. Do a puzzle, do some math problems, list off the things you need to do tomorrow, things that take your full attention take you to a logical place and pull you away from the urges. I especially like the puzzles, find one you enjoy and that you are good at, this way you get a sense of accomplishment when you finish it as well.
Always know, the human spirit is the hardest thing in the world to kill, you might not be able to feel it, but it is there, you can trust it, you can lean on it, it will not break, you are so much stronger than you think you are.

Hope I helped. If anyone wants to talk, or wants more explanation on this, feel free to PM me.

zahraa88 16-09-2008 10:56 PM

i do the 15 minute thing
i write my feelings, i give my razors to my mum and sit with her, i draw and i listen to music

behindblueyes 17-09-2008 04:07 AM

believe in yourself.

Detour. Derail 21-09-2008 11:37 PM


Originally Posted by Useless Information 101 (Post 56234)
Staying away from a particular place where you normally cut, helps for me. If I have a bad urge I stay away from my bedroom for awhile, even if it means camping out in the bathroom with a book :-P.

Do anything that distracts you, no matter how silly. Ive spent hours browsing through wikipedia.org, looking up the randomest things.

Set a goal and stick to it, it helps keeping that in mind. For instance say to yourself "Im going to go a week without SH". Then when you make that goal reward yourself (not by cutting!) and make another.
Setting goals has probably been the main thing that has kept me SI free.
Make sure you have a good support system as well.


It works...Im nearly 8 months free :]
Going to the gym or for a run helps too...
and I made a distractions box...that was full of fiddly keeps-your-fingers-and-brain-busy kinda things like beads and string and puzzles :P

I also used the butterfly method...
Drawing a buterfly over the place i normally cut in permanent marker...
The idea is that the butterfly represents someone special to them...and if you hurt it...you hurt them...

Schleier von Dunst 03-10-2008 05:42 PM

I find that when I feel like hurting myself, I text my girlfriend. The hardest thing to remember when you feel bad is that you're loved. It's the thing everyone forgets in the spur of the moment. But remember. You are loved. There is someone there who loves you and doesn't want you hurt. A parent or other family member, a friend, a boy/girlfriend, a spouse, a work friend. But there is always someone there for you. When I feel bad I find it helps to text or ring them and just talk. About anything. Get them to tell you that they love you and don't want you hurt, distract you from your thoughts, share a joke or a funny story, maybe. But always remember. You are loved.

That's what helped me make it to 20 days without a slip and still going.

littlesheep 03-10-2008 05:49 PM


Originally Posted by Voice Of Reason (Post 1099267)

I also used the butterfly method...
Drawing a buterfly over the place i normally cut in permanent marker...
The idea is that the butterfly represents someone special to them...and if you hurt it...you hurt them...

i use this on as well......it works

Dissident 26-10-2008 07:17 PM

I tend to stick on some hardcore or metal and have a mini mosh in my room. great stress reliever. :)

-Shae-Lynn* 26-10-2008 11:32 PM

Happy country music.
I swear I cannot be in a bad mood if it's playing!
Find something (healthy) you love doing and do it whenever you feel the need!

lasting 30-12-2008 04:49 PM

i'm not sure where i read this, it might've been on this site, but i don't know and i'm too lazy to look for it lol... it said something like: stare at your arm/leg/whatever you're thinking of cutting and imagine it's the arm/leg or whatever of someone you care about. when you cut, you're cutting their arm.
i've tried this before, and it does make it harder.
i also do breathing excersizes. like, sit down, close your eyes, and breath in for four seconds, hold for four seconds, out for four, and nothing for four. it calms me down, and it also works if i'm nervous.

Wonderland. 30-12-2008 05:16 PM

Keeping myself uber busy.
Not counting the days etc.
Getting angry at things i should get angry at instead of keeping that anger inside of me.


blue_kk 30-12-2008 05:57 PM

i write poems etc
generally i just keep busy
also i text my mates or go round to theirs when i feel down

fuzzy_sweets 30-12-2008 06:10 PM

I draw on my arm with a red felt-tip and as im doing it, it gives me time to think about what might have caused me to want to self-harm.
then if that doesn't work I ring or text a friend, it sometimes helps to chat things through x x

All times are GMT +1. The time now is 11:49 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.