I lost my Grandma in November Crimson hun , Here if you want a ear to type to that sort of understands *HUGE Hugs*

*hugs Mark* thanks i dont think i can right now but i might later on

Anytime Crimson Hun , PM me if you need to *Hugs*

*huggles all*

*holds Crimson* - Not good sweet. Here for you with a box of tissues if required.

Sitting here waiting for a phone call from the Clinical Nurse Consultant (CNC) from the private psych hospital in Cairns to tell me when to pack my bags for my hospital trip to Cairns. Nervous, excited and really scared I'm going to forget something!!

*Hugs everyone*

I remember when I was losing my nanna. My mum thought she wouldn't survive the night one time (she's s nurse) but she hung on for another month. I know how you feel. It's the worst when they're so ill and you're just waiting for the inevitable. But as awful as it sounds, I felt better after she passed. I knew it was going to happen and the waiting was the worst. I'm here if you need me. *Hugs*

I'm going up to the ward in Cairns on monday morning by coach (bus).
Sitting here now with my brain running the "what ifs" as if it had nothing better to do.
I really wish it would stop.
I did all my laundry today so I have clothes to pack tomorrow, and am organising everything else that I need to pack.
Getting really nervous because I am trying to arrange transport to the bus terminal early in the morning on monday and no-one seems to want to get back to me. :-(
Meep.

*Hugs Crimson*

*Hugs Kahlia*I wish you the best of luck with your hospital stay hun , I am going to message you on FB right about now :)

*Hugs Lia*

Wow quiet ward. I guess there will be no one around to hear me then but I'm going to speak anyway. I'm used to it.

What's wrong with me? I am suddenly so near tears and my head is hurting. I'm scared all of a sudden and have an urge to hurt myself but I don't even know why. I had a good day, nothing bad happend. I don't understand it and I am so so tired of it being this way. Why do I just want to cry half the time? When I don't want to cry I'm either really down or tired or actually crying. I don't understand. I just know that my whole world is falling apart and everyone who ever said they'd be there is leaving me. But I'm safe here right? Not every one of you can leave me.

huggles you tightly and gently, im sorry you are having a crap night, please stay hon, i care about u, and dont want anything to happen to you.

*Hugs Jill* Thanks :) I didn't think anyone was going to respond. It's not a night. It's been this way since the beginning of the year. Things went downhill on new year's eve. That bodes well.

You alright?

hugs you back, im sorry this year so far has sucked. keep yourself safe, it going to get better girly, not sure how or when but it has too for both of us. hmm im not great but doent matter, you matter right now my pm box is always open if you need to talk, im mean that okay. huggles

Thanks Jill :) And you always matter.

cheers lia, hmm this sucks im in a bit of pain, cant take tablets and cant sleep.

Why can't you take tablets or sleep? If it's women's trouble pains, hot water bottles help.

*HUGE Hugs Lia*

*Massive Hugs Jill*

thanks mark, hugs back. hmm no i keep getting really weird pain in my chest on the right side, been to dr, he said there was noithing they could do. i cant take tablets as im a bit of a wimp and i end up being sick when i try.

hugs everyone.

*Hugs Jill, Louise and Mark*

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Jill again*

Oops Dual post *Hugs Lia* too :)

hey mark and lia and everyoneeee :)