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Can't sleep. Don't particularly care right now. Fed up of people, I just want to hide from the world somehow, but I know it can't happen because I've got friends coming to visit tomorrow.
Fiance's being no help. He just complains that he's in pain, and apparently all I am is a bitch. So there we go. So triggered for the first time in months, and I just don't know what to do right now. |
*Hugs Hana* Are you looking forward to having friends over tomorrow? If you are, focus on that - It's a positive thing. When I was living with my bf he had so many reasons to bitch at me, but the fact that he bitched didn't necisarely mean that the things he said were true. The same goes for you. You're not a bitch, it just takes a lot of work to be that close to someone, and you are going to have disagreements.
How long have you been without acting on the triggers? Any ammount of time longer than the usual time between doing something is a big achievement. And if you slip up, it's just a slip up. I'm online for a while if you need to talk xxx |
Thanks, zowie. Am looking forward to them coming tomorrow, trying to focus on it, but with everything else going on, it's proving to be a little bit too hard. It's been at least a month without triggers, and I'm not going to let myself slip up over this, but, I don't know, everything just kind of hit me tonight in a big way.
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Well done for going a month without triggers! That's a huge achievment - Honestly.
I know what it's like when it all hits you. And I must admit, I've been weak and slipped up. But you're being so strong. Just remind yourself how strong you are, and how you can get through this. xx |
I'm sorry I haven't been here.. I'm still sick =[ and I go home tomorrow.. blaaaah. Give me a few days and I'll be back full force =] Think I might go and have a sleep now.
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Sleep well Katie xxx
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*hugs Katie, Secrets and Helen* hope you all feel better soon.
*hugs Hana* I hope you have a lovely time with your friends, a month without triggers is fantastic, you can get through this, stay strong. thanks Arwen *hugs back* I know what you mean about the safety net, but when the time comes I'm sure you'll be fine until that time, don't worry about it :) hope your week is going okay. *hugs everyone, take care of yoursleves* I have a haircut today... |
Thanks Arwen and Hannah. Had a good sleep. Less then 12 hrs and I'll be on my way 'home'. *cries*
Been thinking about what I want to do. I'm clearly not happy at uni, hate being there, hate where I live, hate what I study. I'm thinking of sticking it out for one more semester and then possible moving back with my family for awhile. Maybe. I don't know. I don't know what to do =[ |
Enjoy the haircut hannah =]
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*drops in for a bit*
hey guys! i hope ur keeping okies there! xx |
Hey guys, sorry I haven't been around for a while. *Big hugs and loves for the last week or so!*
I met my new psych last week and he's actually really great. The problem is that I have so many different problems they need to work out the best treatment for me and what is priority. My good news is that I am finally starting to conquer my anorexia. It's been getting very dangerous, collapsing and having heart scans and bone scans, I have the oestrogen levels of a pre-pubescent, I can't sit down comfortably any more because of the bones... And at the weekend something just switched and now I'm eating again! It's so amazing!! I do need some serious psychological help for the transition, because I'm not eating like a normal person, I kind of feel the need to hide it and stuff, and I'm gonna really really struggle when I gain weight arrrrghhh... But it's massive progress. Otherwise things have been going ok, trying to get my stupid essays done, applying for jobs, etc etc. Hope everyone is doing ok, lots of loves xxx Ps. BigBear just seen your post... Feel free to PM me if you want because I had the exact same struggle. I've now moved back to my parents' and I'm going to finish my degree with the Open University. So if you wanna talk through it all and options and stuff then feel free :-) |
*hugs zowie* thank you sweetie, we can both get through the bad days i know it, even if its hard!
*hugs wildly insane* how did the haircut go? *hugs bigbear* you've got to do whats best for you honey *hugs banana* wow your psyche sounds excellent :) and double wow and a million hugs on the anorexia conquering :) you can do it! loads of love xx ----- I'm struggling today but i'm determined to get through it |
I slept through most of the day. But that's stopped me from smoking too much, which is good. x
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Hi everyone, been away for a few days, sleeping. I think i got up twice in the last 48 hours, and that was just to go pee and refill my water bottle.
I feel far better than I did before the sleep, a lot more calm and content as opposed to intensely manic. *hugs to everyone* not going to curl up in my usual spot today, too much i want to do before i head to work! |
I can't cope, guys. I can't.
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Please, is anybody around?
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Hey Vicki, I'm around if you are, if not then I hope you found somebody to talk to.
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*hugs Jazz* I'm glad you feel better, I hope it lasts, wow that's a lot of sleep
*hugs Arwen* sleep is good, I would love to spend all day in bed, I would never allow myself the luxury :P *hugs Shadowedseraph* haircut is good thanks, about 4 inches off and well layered , still below shoulder length though, a little different is what I fancied. I hope you got through the day okay and that you are feeling better. let us know if you wanna talk about it. *hugs Hannahbanana* am so glad your psych sounds good, and yay for wanting to get better, we're here for you every step of the way. *hugs Jem* hopes you is okay :) *hugs Katie* sounds tough hun, don't rush any decision. Is there another subject you do want to do, or do you not want to do it at all. I hope things are better for you at home. my day just went, bumbled around, doing stuff, not as well or as much as I should but still, went okay. Liking the haircut :) |
Just thought I'd let you know I'm back! Feeling better but still slightly sick. Anyway we have people staying for the weekend so I'll try to pop in tonight.. Take care xx
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Helloooo all!!!! :hehe:
Sorry been quiet but once I got out of spasm thanks to a fab physio, thank goodness for dla meaning I could pay for a private appointmnet :-) , but anyhoo, I had things to do, people to see, flat to super clean :thumbup: Am about to leave the flat yet again to go have lunch with my mummy - leaving this early as I have a long bus journey - but anyhoo, she wanted to see me now that I'm a happy incarnated angel :-D Will pop back in and catch up properly soon and give individual responses when I've time, but until then......time for a group huggle!!! :woot: *GROUP HUGGLES EVERYONE IN WARD* oh yes, and I told my therapist that I was an incarnated angel yesterday and rather than my usual tears of desperation when there I actually cried happy tears :laugh: Think she now thinks I've lost the plot, but I haven't...... well if I have, who cares, this feels good!!! love you all lots, couldn't have got this far without you all. :kiss: Mwah!! |
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