Just writing a quick note to let everyone know I won't be around much until my laptop gets fixed. I'll be thinking of you all though.

*hugs all in the ward*

*squishes Katie and Kahlia lots*

Hey guys, just to let you know I've been thinking of you all. My M.E symptoms are starting to settle down to what I call my version of normal, which is good, cos I'm travelling down to my mum's for a few days and she's going to colour and cut my hair for me! Yay! I've not done anything to it in nearly 10months, so its in desperate need of some tlc. So top half black, bottom half pillar box red, with long layers and half black.half red fringe!!! My partner will get a shock when he comes back from his blokes holiday, haha!!!
Hopefully I'll be back online a bit more in a few days when I return and can do individual replies then. Kinda pointless now as I've missed 5days, I've read through though so I am updated....how much information though my brain retains is anyones guess! *great big huggles to all*

*goes out to smoking shelter hoping a fag will delay dinner for a bit*

*Hugs Katie* Nice to see you sweetie, hope you get through tonight alright

*Hugs Kahlia* Take care of yourself while you're away

*Cuddles Helen*

*Hugs Hayley* Glad your M.E is setlling. Those colours sound fab! Have a good time at your mums.

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I'm still not feeling 100%. But my sister has come over armed with wine, so I'm going to risk it and hope it doesn't make me feel worse...

Is it okay if I stay here until I feel a bit safer?

*hugs Helen and Arwen back*

I'm online thanks to TsvTux allowing me use of his laptop.

The physio put my wrist and thumb into a splint so I've now got that whole space-age wrist thing happening. At least I'm getting movement back in my wrist I suppose. The physio still wants to work on my shoulder and I'm not 100% convinced that's a good idea but we'll see.

*gentle hugs to all on the ward*

*hugs Miss_Angelus* well done for supporting, maybe try and talk to get some support for yourself?

*hugs VoiceofReason* hope you're feeling better today.

*hugs Kahlia* Glad to hear your wrist is getting better, maybe go with the shoulder physio and just make sure you're vocal if you aren't happy with it? And grr for your laptop having the same problem.

*hugs MammaMia*

*hugs Bigbear*

*hugs Hayley* have a lovely time away.

*hugs zowie* feel better soon

*hugs SpiritGuide* of course you can stay here, how are you?

Struggling soooooo much. I'm still hiding in the denial tent :'(

*hugs to all*

Thanks Secrets. I'm really wanting the support right now. I think that's why I've wandered here.

I'm not doing well at all today. This hurts too much && I can't stand it. The shaking won't stop.

Spirit[Guide] - Course you can stay here hun, you okay?

*Hugs Kahlia* Hope everything starts healing soon, you've been putting up with this for ages!

*Hugs Secrets back*

*Snuggles Helen* Wanna talk about it sweets? *Sits with you*

*Hugs Miss Angelus* Sorry you're not doing well hun, we're all here if you need us. What's causing the shaking? Try to take it easy and be kind to yourself.

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Had some wine with my sister last night. The headache came back, but nowhere near as bad as it was. I think I might be going to Brighton tomorrow to see my grandma, hopefully I'll feel well enough for that!
Haven't eaten at all today, really thinking I should...

*Hugs to zowie* I haven't taken anything today. I have a bit of a substance abuse problem. I'll take anything that makes me drowsy. Only really jsut realised I had a problem though. So I'm trying cold turkey but it reallly hurtss emotional and physically and then theres the shakingg.
I just can't take my mind of it.

*comes in. Just to sit*

*hugs Angelus* Im sorry about the shaking, that sounds rough... Try to keep distracted.

*hugs Voice of Reason*

I was doing so well the past few days... then my bf's mom got in a lot of trouble (with the law)... now things are going back to crap... *sigh*

Im sick of living one day at a time. I cant keep doing this.

argh ****sake, i cant do this. im loosing this battle.

*hugs Fallenstar0317* Sorry to hear things are going bad for you I hope things look up soon.

*Hugs Alexxx* Cheer up dall face I'm here for you every day

*Hugs shadowedsoul* I'm sure you can do it. You won't lose the war :)


I gave in. The shakings stopped. && i'm numb again. I like this feeling better. But in my head I feel weak.

:'( So tired of fighting. What's the point?

3 months free today... Sorry I haven't checked in in a few days, I was at my friend's birthday party...

My boyfriend and I just had a sort of fight... I feel like I've been stabbed in the chest...
He keeps telling me how much pain he's in, but he refuses to let me help him...
he says that him opening up and TELLING me he's in pain is a big thing for him... but it's just so hard to leave it at that...

My heart hurts... and I'm struggling to resist a relapse...

I really can't do this anymore. Am struggling so much but finding it hard to reach out. Everytime I do I just get what feels like a slap in the face

*hugs MammaMia* Sweetie it can get better i belive in you
*hugs Ashely* I'm sure your boyfriend doesnt mean to hurt you
*hugs secrets* you can do it honey, im right here for you

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Going on holiday on saturday, i need to be better by then, and yet it seems hopeless