*hugs Laura* Good luck with moving apartments

*leaves big hugs for everyone else on the ward*

Shiiiiiiit, I missed a good few posts in here o__o;.

My friend's mum spoke to my GP because she says that my housemate and I are at crisis point, and has managed to - apparently - get the crisis team to come and see me but...nothing yet. I've also got a psychiatrist appointment for 12th October, I think, but I'm only really interested in that to finally find out exactly what the **** the void is -__-;;.

Speaking of, it's really ****ing strong tonight x_O. My head's been feelng really funny tonight >_< and it's becoming a struggle to fight it off. I'm trying, though.

Sorry I haven't really been replying much to anyone else's problems lately D: *hugs all* <3

goes into a padded room and hits head on the wall to stop my head going

Sorry guys... I've been around.. just too much **** happening. Episodes ****ing with my head-starting to feel disoriented, missed my bus stop today. Grr. Been having really good highs but then come crashing down bad. Fricken hate it. I'm over it all. r/ship is hanging on by a thread.. mmhmmmm. I don't know what I want to do anymore.. dunno what I want =[ I'll be back later.. just wanted to check in *hugs for all*

*hugs all*

Dayna/Todlich ~ I hope you and your housemate get the help you need
Katie ~ Just hang in there darl - easier to say than to do I know
Cherylwilson ~ *holds you and keeps you safe from your head*

Actually if I knew how to fix heads I'd be worth millions.

*hugs to all* i hope peoples days are going better today, my head is not letting me type too much so just leaving *hugs* and love

i wish u cud 2 wish ne1 cud. be helpfull. i know i need help just dont know how people could help thats all. goes bk to hiding ro the world

*hugs cheryl* have you got anyone you could speak to who could maybe help you figure it out?

well i tried to phone my cpn but he was out. so in the end i phoned up the OT which is complicated cus she was officially suppose to discharge me yest but turns out that in theroy its next week. its confusing for me let alone neone else. she tried still bout the same lil less hysterical think ive ran out of tears and gota go to work now and put on a happy face when all i can think of is killing myself argh my head feels like its going to explode. sorry i know im going on and wasting everyones time

*hugs cheryl* your not wasting anyones time! I'm glad you phoned your OT did she help at all? Perhaps going to work will help you feel a bit better, give you something to concentrate on? Sorry i'm not much help

Message from Nicole[mouse in darkness]
Hugs to all and big safe hugs to Arwen in the quarantine corner. I hope that everyone starts to improve and everyone starts to feel okay. She said to tell you all that she misses you and the support she gets from RYL.

Nicole is still in hospital and hasn't seen a doctor so we don't know how long she'll be in there for. She was starting to feel a little better today so hopefully not too much longer.

*leaves hugs for everyone*

So I have news.
Apparentlly Im too much hassle for my ex to stay friends with me.
Apparentlly he hates me
Apparentlly Im a bitch who makes everything difficult and complicated
Apparentlly I cause all the drama in my life and he never wants to see me again.

You know what....FINE!
I hate him *shakes with anger*

You know what?
I can't do this.
I can't cope with her being so suicidial and was going to kill herself yesterday. But I have to
I can't cope with someone else and their custody battle, because his parents are such ****ing wankers. But I have to
I can't cope with the urges. But I have to
I can't cope with my ****. But I have to
I can't cope with my sisters making stuipd comments. But I have to
I can't cope with ANYTHING!!!! But I have to

**** IT ALL (Y)

*hides in the denial tent because everything is just FINNNNNNNNNNNNNE*

*offers support to Alexx*
*hugs Helen tightly*

Did I mention that my friend let me down again? Three times she was supposed to come over - THREE FRICKING TIMES - but each time she didn't show she didn't even bother to send a text, email, whatever to say she wasn't coming. Inconsiderate bitch. Sorry but that irks me. If you say you are going to do something then you do it, if you can't you let people know. Grrrrrr.

sorry I haven't written much recently, but I have been reading and thinking of you all. I just wanted to send you all hugs and hope things get better, oh and puppy sinclair is bouncing around slobbering over everyone who will give him a kiss :)

um yeh she did help slightly but i still feel the same if that makes sense. ended up being upset at work.

4 words i never wanted to hear: "you're going to die"
times i've heard them today (aka in the 2-3 hours of consciousness): 9
how long they've given me: 6 months max.
likelyhood of ever seeing my horses again: slim-to-none.
FML x infinity...

*hugs Kahlia tightly but hopes she doesn't hurt you*

*hugs PapaBear if he can accept hugs* I'm so sorry to hear that :(

Hannah ~ thinking of you too. And I did wonder where puppy SinClair got to
cherylwilson ~ *offers hugs*
PapaBear ~ I'm so sorry. That's the worst news you could ever hope to hear. *offers hugs if you are able to take them*
Helen ~ thanks for the gentle hugs *hugs you right back*

I saw the physio today for my wrist and they are worried about the amount of pain in my thumb. They said if it continues or gets worse in any way they'd send me back upstairs (fracture clinic). My thumb and my hand are really painful. My shoulder at least is not too bad from the surgery. The physio said that my asking whether the capsule will stretch again isn't stupid and I should ask them when I see them next.

I also went for lunch with my sister, brother in law and my sister in law today and went to my old GP so she would write what I wanted her to on the Stat Dec for my court hearing. I think what she has written will be good enough but I'm going to run it by legal aid first.

Now I'm tired, dizzy and dehydrated. Fun.

Everyone thinks i'm getting better, but i'm not *cries* i really need a hug