*cuddles everyon*

I feel better than I did earlier, must have been a wobbly moment...

*cuddles April* yeah I have a website like this but for LGBT youth so thats cool, the course is going ok so far, its going to be tough lots of hard music and have a full day of rehearsals today.
*cuddles everyone* I got to go to breakfast now.

Morning everyone :D *cuddles all*

Love how quiet the ward went after my last post. Hope everyone's okay.

I have a migraine and woke up crying from my nightmare & then believed it was Sunday. But managed to finally remind myself that it IS Saturday thank god =)

Sun's out shining & warm yet again!! Shame we have to stay in for a wee while, until these men have gone and then we can go to my Nan's :D Might be going to the park before then with couple of my friends..:P

I didn't get up until 11.15 am , SO LAZY ! I've just got no motivation for anything , feel generally low , and triggered too:(

I really wanted to sleep straight away last night so I was a bit naughty and took 2 Diazepam ( 10mg each ) , it worked but I can't keep doing that I simply am not prescribed enough . I 'm dreading trying to get to sleep tonight.

*Hugs ward mates*

*hugs Mark*

You are NOT lazy at all :) Lie in's are good & you obviously needed it. Don't be so hard on yourself. I know it's easier said than done. *snuggles*

*briefly pops by again to make sure you all ok*

Helen, sorry you had a rough patch, awesome that you've bounced back, that's tough to do!

Mark, sleep is healing, don't beat yourself up ok. If you need to increase meds then maybe talk to your doc huh *hugs*

Laura, so sorry you cut hun, make sure you look after the wound and treat tomorrow as a new day (or today depending on your time zone lol )

April, hope you're doing ok, my day was long and emotional but the ceremony went beautifully on a hill overlooking the sea and the sun shined for my baby uncle :)

Hugs everyone else, I will get better at checking in all the rooms and corners when I get home and back on my laptop.

Off to bed now over here in the southern hemisphere!
xx

*huggles all*

Sorry for the lack of individual replies. Last night I had intended to come on here this morning but I woke up really not feeling 100% today and things have just continued to go downhill.

Good news for the day: my housemate and I undertook an introductory coffee making course that will act as a stepping stone for us to begin working as a barista. We learnt about extracting the coffee and heating the milk and also appropriate hygiene etcetera. It was really interesting. The course went for 3 hours and the instructor (and his assistant) were both really good - very helpful if you had any questions. The worst part for me was that I had to stand for about 2 hours and I was nearly collapsing.

The bad bits of today: We went down to get pizza for dinner and apparently it was burnt. I smelt it and then started to feel sick and just couldn't eat. The almost collapsing at the coffee course. Almost falling down the stairs at our residence because my legs were threatening to give way. And, of course, the waking up and not feeling 100%. Also I've been having really strong urges towards su and si. And today have kept wanting to cry ... I'm getting a bit sick of that.

Anyway, I'm hoping that I'll start to get a bit better and then will be able to keep up a bit better.

*huggles everyone then disappears quickly into the smoking shelter before settling down in a dark corner*

*hugs Kahlia* Sorry you are feeling so low :( That coffee making course does sound interesting :) What is a barista? Am I just being dull?

hey guys. hope you're all enjoying the nice weather :D im loving it. spent the day at millets farm with my cousin and auntie and the little ones :D had a great time. even the fact that it was too hot to wear a jumper didnt spoil my day. because guess what-apart from 2 tiny little cuts-i havent cut in almost 2 WEEKS!!!!!

2 weeks !! Thats really good to hear Nicole , well done :) I'm glad you are having a good day .

thankyou :D hows your day been?

Well the weather here is nice too so I walked about a bit , down by the canal here , saw the ducks and ducklings :)
Been triggered all day though and S.I. won . Again . * sigh * I just don't feel it will ever stop . Not ever . Sorry to whine .

aaawh. you're not whining. thats what these boards are for, supporting eachother. im sorry you felt the need to SI :( *hugs* it will stop eventually. glad it was sunny there too :D its nice to have some sun. we get rain most of the time!!

*cuddles everyone*

Hope you're feeling better, at least physically Kahlia. Course sounds fun though :)

Mark, I'm sorry SI won this battle, but think about all the battles YOU'VE won against it & you will be free one day *snuggles* Glad you got out though, that's good.

Nicole, congratulations on the two weeks free darling & glad you got out today with family :)

Today's been bit annoying. It's been lovely here, woke up early so was impressed with that & eventually went to my Nan's. Saw my aunt, uncle & my brother :) Plus my Nan, obviously!!

But before that, I said to a couple of friends that I probably should be able to go out with them for a bit & then head to my Nan's. But my plans changed and K seemed to get really huffy with me about it. Nearly turned into an argument. Then they've been clearly talking about me AGAIN because I said something to H the other day about not having a present for my birthday off K. Don't know how it came up but I said it in a jokey way and how she never forgets Christmas, but does birthdays. She's obviously told K about it because got a text asking why etc :/

Friends eh? Who'd have 'em? =P

*grumbles*

aaaweh *hugs* glad you managed to get out and see some family, well done :D sorry to hear your friends are being like that :( i still havent spoken to mine. lol. when was your birthday hun?

*cuddles everyone*

*cuddles laura* you ok??

Hey everyone.*drags herself out of bed and asks Kahlia real nice for a double shot flat white*
Mark- SI will not always win ok, otherwise we wouldn't all be here in the ward. We must believe we will beat it! I had 15 years SI free, so view my current space a temporary blip!

Thanks for the coffee Kahlia, friends can be weird, especially cos with MH issues we can be a bit sensitive too huh *hugs and understands*

*cuddles Helen* hope things still ok for you, good that you got out and about hun

*high fives Nicole* 2 weeks is awesome, keep going chick, it takes a while to break the habit but when you do you've won. Very proud of ya! X

*hugs Laura* how you today sweet? Hope you looking after yourself ok?

*Hugs hope-is-overrated and any other peeps I've missed and heads off to breakfast*

YAAY *high fives* thankyou, that just made me feel really proud of myself and motivated me to try more :D. i reckon, if i get through tonight and tomorrow, then monday im going back to my cousins until thursday, shes staying at mine thursday night, its my 16th birthday on friday, im going clothes shopping saturday, and i should have my RYL meet sunday :D so i've got enough to keep me going as long as i can get through tonight and tomorrow :D

You should be very proud of yourself, its really not that easy huh! Keep yourself busy for the next couple of days, ok? You can do it, us lot believe in you *hugs to give the strength you need*