*huggles Hayley* thank you...

Alexx hun, you can get through this, you've let no one down, and I don't know who you mean about the last bit but please take care...

just with anyone....just...live in a hole...hide away..;from everyone

Don't do that hun, it won't help (and we'll miss you too much)
What's triggered you to feel like this?

its always raining...raining in my head..and i cant get away...and no one wants that...I'll be alone for ever...and i got on the bus...and a young couple got on..they must have only been about 13..and i was so jealous...and i was crying but no one noticed...or cared...and a thought hit me...
traffic lights keep changing..even if theres no car...
life will go on...with or without me..

Life goes on after death, but it would not be the same without you, something would always be missing. For the people who love you life would never be the same again. And not in a good way either.
I think that often, but then I get bollocked by my friends for it =)
You won't be alone forever. Nope. You're far too gorgeous and brilliant for that.

*snuggles alexx* I wish that I knew you better and could take away your pain......and everyone elses.

i'm off to bed shortly, but before I find a place in the ward to get comfy for the night, anybody got anything to stop the itching?! I've run out of stuff in my medicine drawer apart from TCP but that stings like a bitch!

Thanks hayley *cuddles*
I wish i was beautiful and brilliant...I feel...ugly...and stupid and invisible.. :/

I wish i was invisible

^ just because you don't see it doesn't mean it's not the truth. It means you're not looking properly.
Hayley, I usually just grin and bear itching, but moisterisers can help a tiny bit.

When he keeps telling me I can't make him happy
When he keeps telling me its pointless, I start to wonder why I even bother

I'm getting a countdown
I can't do this
19 mins
I Can't

^ what happens then hun?

img eting mre out of it as the mornign goes on and i have to pick up young people and drive them. and two of them are really absuice. lucky that outher youth worker will be there to protect me. want to go home. dont feel well. find out results for blod test tonight. ****.

Hun if you're not well then go home, get some rest. Does anyone know about the two that are abusive?
Try not to panic hun, and I hope the tests come back fine for you xx

15 mins till my boyfriend kills himself
There's nothing I can say or do to make him listen
He makes me feel about an inch high most of the time
I don't know why I fight so hard sometimes you know?

Because you love him?
It wasn't very fair of him to tell you that and just leave you to wait. Do you actually think he'll go through with this hun? Because if you do it may be worth asking whoever he lives with to pop in on him?

I dont..

Love is a strong word
When he makes me feel this way, I'm not sure anymore
It's not fair no, but it's not like him to be fair to me
I don't know, I know he's cut before now, but lied to me about how he got it (as well as flipping at me for it)
I've managed to talk him round, with little time to spare :/
But I don't know how long it will last
Probably not long knowing him

Hun if he doesn't treat you well it may be worth taking a break...you deserve to be treated well.
Well done for talking him round.
*hugs*

Doesn't feel like a victory
It's a cheap win
I feel empty now

i' mtrying. i raly am. i'm sorry eveyrone. i gots to go . wont be on mcuh today at all.

Jess, how come?
<alive> (dunno your name sorry) take care hun xxx

Because its all the time now
Most days I have to convince him why he shouldn't do this
Why this, why that
I didn't mind it at first, because I made it up to him
Now I just feel so small and insignificant again

Sorry for the double post but I'm going to go sleep this off
Have a good day everyone, thank you Ku for listening :-)
Night all xxxx

You're definitely not small or insignificant.
It sounds like he has a lot to work through, but he shouldn't put it all on you, that's not fair.
I hope you sleep well hun.
Night night xx
Oh, and I'll listen anytime =)

is jes. just cnat. work hard. gots to og out now. bey

hun look after yourself, dont work too hard

*cries*

Hi Nancy 91.
*accepts Hayley's cuddles*
I should be sad. I'm not. It hasn't hit me. My friend isn't likely to survive the summer. I've been in the mode of getting info off to others though. Even though I usually don't wear bracelets when I work, i'm wearing the charm bracelet that has her charm on it, holding the charm in my palm when I can.

I can pray and meditate sometimes when I work. Today's stuff is that kind of work. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 pray without ceasing Psalm 51:10-11 Create in me a clean heart O God And renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Hope y'all don't mind the references. That is what I am off to do, and get some sewing done at the same time.

blah :-(

*hugs jermery*

Oh my gwad, it's like nearly 5am, WHY CAN'T I JUST BE NORMAL WHEN IT COMES TO SLEEP =(

*hugs helen*

*leaves cuddles bear for everyone&


*locks self in dungeon* leave me.

Just woke up. Going on holiday tonight, a bit nervous because I'll be far away and camping. What if Beth becomes too much?

*breaks jess out of the dungeon*

Can I check in, i'm not doing so good.

Course you can tbsmac, what's up? *Offers a pillow*

^ hun try and enjoy your time away. and if she does then you just have to tell her to sod off, however hard it is.
hey tbsmac

hello tbsmac!! :-)


How r u Ku? u been keeping well there???

dont want to live. shh. dont tell.

*hugs jess*

I feel the same as u right this moment and f$#k it feels crappy

*hugs*
yep same.
we'll get through though, right?

*cuddles Ku*

Yep..i guess so :-)

went a bit crazy last week, thought I turned corner at the weekend but no, yesterday was bad, today is worse, tomorrow I dont dare think, i'm just gonna go and hide in a corner.

*hides with you in the corner*
what happened hun?

never been so hrut to be told someone wants to be left alone. i want to cut so bad.

I dont know, I lost it, cant really remember what happened, which is probably better, I remember I thought there were demons trying to kill me but thats bout it, it was awful. Then as soon as it started it went again and I wasn't too bad. I dont know what happened yesterday I feel really bad, restless, thought consuming me, I cant escape.

*huge hugs* try and keep distracted hun...talk to us?

and claire (I looked on your profile :]) that sounds so scary. try and keep yourself distracted hun. i know when i thought i was being attacked (a few years ago, by monster/demon things not people) i was terrified and then they left and it was fine, but it does play on your mind.

I am i'm trying really hard, arrrrrgh:mad:

*hugs everyone*

I'm still feeling sucidical too :(

*hugs helen*
be safe hun...