Hi :D

*huggles all*

one day to go until 2 1/2 years (30 months) si free ...

*hugs ward*

Kahlia, that's awesome! :)

Soo... I was hanging around with my friend Allison earlier tonight, and we were listening to a radio show, and they were taking song dedications, then next thing I know there's an email to the show host from Allison talking about what a great friend I am, and dedicating Firework by Katy Perry to me. Not gonna lie, it kinda makes me super happy... and it makes me cry. From happiness of course.

@Felicia: Wow, that sounds really nice, & cool :D

It's been a day of chasing up forms for deferring exams and other paperwork .... I hate my illness at times like this. But I'm looking to get admitted into a psych ward for some treatment and I'm still extremely unwell, so academically it would be .... unwise for me to attempt the exam at this point. *le sigh* One step at a time I guess.

*Hugs Oliver*
*Hugs Claire*
*Hugs Lia*
*Hugs Kahlia* Congratulations Hun!
*Hugs Felicia* Thats so cool! :D

Freaking out about my Psychiatrist appoinment , FREAKING OUT !! is anyone here? , It's not for another 3 hours and this anxiety needs to **** right off.

I'm here, Mark. Can you try some relaxation exercises? What is it that's making you anxious?

I've put on more chilled out music Which helps.
I also injured right before a Psych Dr appointment , not smart but it helped.
I've never met this Dr, My mind keeps on going "What if he changes your meds?" "What if he wants to hospitalise you?" Anxiety is just not helping. I'l try a relaxation techniquue I know , good idea :)
How are you Lindsay? *Hugs*

The "what ifs" are so annoying. What would you like to happen at the appointment?

I'm ok. I've almost saved up enough meds to overdose on so i'll get a break from life soon. I saw my psychologist today and he said he'll speak to my psychiatrist about the fact that it seems to be written in stone that i'm never allowed to be admitted to a psych ward again. I just want to know that I will be kept safe if I am a danger to myself.

You have the right to be kept safe Lindsay , Please be careful.
I'd like the Dr to say "You are going to stay on your currents meds , all of them , at the same dose and keep getting support in the community" Because thats what I want , maybe 200mg more Lithium to try and find out if I can get shot of my Depressed days but basically stay the same. I NEED the meds I'm on and am taking them as prescribed so I hope I get what I want:S

Do you think you could say what you want?

I don't know , I'm so nervous , my social worker will be there but she is new too , (To me) , so I am just wary , Really wary .

Thanks for talking with me Lindsay *Hugs* 18 minutes and I'm on my way out the door:S

Right off I go........

I hope everything goes well, Mark.

*Hugs Lindsay*
I met Dr Starskun, He was very different from my usual Dr much more forthright , He Bouoght up an old Dr whom I saw once And I said I hated him and he said he wanted to kill him , this old Dr asked inappropriate sexual questions of me , but.......water under the bridge I guess , Just bought stuff up . He Prescribed me Olanzapine 2.5mg (I'm already on 10mg) As needed .

*hugs Mark and Lindsay and Laura (cuz I spy you!) and anyone else who wanders in*

*Hugs Crimson* How are you hun?

Getting fed up... last night I couldn't find a paper from the VA so I was going to call and have a copy faxed to me but every time I call I either get automated bs or when they try to connect me to a real person I get a message that my call can't be completed at this time...over one freaking piece of paper. They want me to use an online service to get info on my benefits but I can't get a log on until I talk to someone and its a circle of stupid bullshit!
/rant
the va just tends to make everything difficult because if they jerk you around for long enough most people just give up.
and the AHFC has an issue with the house so I need to fix a few things before I can finish getting the house
*sigh*
so frustrated!

How are you, Mark?

I'm so glad the uisness and of today is over.
I'm sorry you are struggling Crimson hun *Hugs* What are VA and AHFC?
You are an awesome person Crimson and you can do this just take a moment and breathe :)