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Detour. Derail 31-05-2008 01:06 AM

My heads like....*whoosh*
How does this happen?
why do some people make you feel so...
just a picture can make you...

I'm gonna shut up....this is a really pathetic post....
why am i still typing?!?!?
Ignore me.

MammaMia 31-05-2008 01:58 AM

Alexx? Want to talk? x

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 02:34 AM

Finished my papers, lousy as hell, but at least I've completed my last paper for school, at least for my under grad.

Now it's time to drink.

Pomegranate 31-05-2008 02:42 AM

*pounces on Ally* YAY well done!!!! Just sent the boys out to 24hour Tesco's for alcohol for me too!!

*hugs Alexx* Here if you want to talk hun xx

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 03:01 AM

:-) thanks. I'm just hoping that they're good enough that I can pass and finish Uni.. But my immediate concern is my dinner getting done because I haven't even had two glasses of wine and I already taste alcohol when I breath:yuck:

*hugs Emma back* gosh I wish you weren't across an entire country and an ocean :-) careful with the alcohol sweetie
Ugh, and I feel awful :crying: would love to cut but I think I'll hold off till I'm more liquored up, can do more damage that way :crying:

Pomegranate 31-05-2008 03:05 AM

Yeah I know the feeling :) What state do you live in out of interest? Shame I'm not a millionnaire....a cross atlantic drinking session trip would be awesome! Aaah well will have to wait until one of us makes our millions or enters a relationship with Richard Branson or until I go travelling round the states.

I'm always careful :P You be too xx

MammaMia 31-05-2008 03:26 AM

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay for Ally

*hides and shakes to death* I'm sorry if you want to know why...I am not allowed to say on the forums. You'll have to pm me xxx

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 03:37 AM

lol millions *smiles at the absurdity of the thought* :-D
I live in Washington state on the west coast... I'm not on the Washington coast, sort of in the middle of the state... But it really is almost an entire country and an ocean away.

Helen, am going to PM you

MammaMia 31-05-2008 03:40 AM

ok hun

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 04:00 AM

Emma!! I need your email addy! Want to send you a 'drink' (ok so it's a picture of the wine I'm drinking and a wine glass) but because I'm on my blackberry I can't send it through PM :-(

blondiebear 31-05-2008 04:27 AM

Ally, for a paper; done, in on time, and about the subject is usually enough for a passing grade.

Jess, I've had so many second-degree/blistering sunburns that I've lost track. Yes that often and that severely.

Bathe or shower in cool or lukewarm water, not cold! Cold water will make your body sicker. Then an over the counter anti-inflammatory painkiller helps. What is use is ibuprofin/advil/motrin, normal doses, normal timing. It will help with the pain and the anti-inflammatory helps. Don't know what name for ibuprofin is used in the UK. Please tell me? Once it stops hurting, then go ahead and use moisturiser to help it heal. For a minor sunburn, I use aloe vera gel, then I keep it in the fridge.

Weather getting hot. Most of the places we saw were "semi-ghost" towns, diminished but not dead. Saw some nice stuff though. One of the towns was completely ghost, had three buildings, adobe melting back to the earth, the stones not so quickly. One of the roads, gawk, when please did I become afraid of heights?

My dear sweet husband got angry this morning at someone ahead of us in the quick checkout line at Wal*Mart, the other person was buying enough stuff for his weekend picnic. Husband had a temper tantrum. Sigh. Least said, soonest mended.

Hands out gatorade to those who are drunk or getting drunk.

Hugs all around!

MammaMia 31-05-2008 04:28 AM

I love you.

Jetforce 31-05-2008 04:35 AM

*cuddles every1*

Well..i'm a nursing student and i was sitting in with my faciliator who was seeing initiate clients suffering mental health problems...so yeah, i was just sitting there listening to see wat they do :-) *pulls ally along* i think u'll like it hon

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 04:45 AM

lol you're right Jeremy, I would :-) I love that sort of thing.

Helen, I love you too sweet heart and remember... Still holding *snuggles*

*hugs* love you Blondie-Mom. And you're right... But I haven't been doing too well in these classes. I am usually a B average student without trying but now I'm really hoping to get Cs.
Are you at least having fun, dear mother?

*returns to her wine* not that y'all want to know but was sick already but thankfully I've got more alcohol so no worries

MammaMia 31-05-2008 04:57 AM

I wonder how long we've stayed holding each other? Must be coming upto two months?

blondiebear 31-05-2008 05:19 AM

Actually I am having fun. Feel like a moron though, was in a bead shop in Santa Fe last week and forgot to get a white bead for my collection. This is after I asked bestest uncle to bring one back from Italy for me.

Last night I did a poor job of reading this week's step. Still, I did a quick overview of the pertinent points. It is one of those steps in AA that we only really do once, "Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs." Once the big one is done, it is maintainence. Actually I've had to do it five times, I'm such a mess and have worn out that many sponsors in AA so the new ones have had me do the searching and fearless moral inventory each time.

Bless my husband, he is letting me sit next to the a/c in my sleepshirt and he's been going back and forth doing laundry! And got some food from the car. S'mores flavor pop tarts for dinner.

Do calories count when you've been walking around deserted buildings that are falling down. Avoiding cow plops and ant hills while doing so?

So, yeah, I am that kind of tired with bloodshot eyes and slightly sunburned skin that means that I really did have a good time today!

*hands out raspberry diet rite and s'mores pop tarts*

*drops off some gatorade powder-mix for emma and ally*

*gives a hug to everyone still awake*
*tucks covers in around everyone asleep*

MammaMia 31-05-2008 05:23 AM

*hides even more and resumes shaking*

Screw this.

~*forever_broken*~ 31-05-2008 05:36 AM

lol must be about that luv, but sometimes you just need it.

If y'all will allow me to get all religious I'll tel you what happened last night.
Before I really let my depression take control I was very involved in my churches college group. I lead worship for three years and never missed a Thursday night (which was when we got together every week) unless I was sick. But last year I wasn't able to put the time and effort into it that I know I needed to (I'm one that believes there needs to be some prayerful thought into things like leading worship... Sorry if y'all don't agree) and so I asked someone else to take over for this school year... And other than last night have only been one Thursday night.

Last night was Grad night for our college group where we , 'congratulate' those who are finishing uni (I guess that's what I'd call it any way). Folks share memories about those students who are leaving, they are singled out during the end of the year slide show and receive a small gift (dollar store purches but nice none the less). At the end of the night we sang one more song and the gal who I asked to replace me said she had one more memory about me to share. The song she was about to do was one I did often when I lead worship called 'This is the Day'. The first two lines are 'There's a reason to sing today. There's a reason to thank you for my life' and I would always say something to the effect of 'You know, it doesn't matter how bad your day is, how bad you're feeling, there's always a reason to sing and praise God'. She shared that memory and I bawled the entire song. I'd forgotten, I'd forgotten that's how I felt once. And I was thinking... I don't know what that reason is... Damn depression, I really did lose everything when I gave up and gave the depression control of my life:crying:
:crying:**** me:crying:

Jetforce 31-05-2008 05:56 AM

Awww..i'm sorry hon :-( don't have much to say really

*cuddles u ally*

Pomegranate 31-05-2008 06:12 AM

Ally, I understand, more than you would think. I am supposed to be going to church group (worship, wow, prayer, discussion etc) once a week, doing Alpha course also once a week and worship once a week but I just can't right now and it is hard to see how you were compared with now. It sort of shoves how much you have lost down your throat and it is not fun. It's hard. But you could always regain that relationship with God and even if you don't feel ready right now...we can just drink more lol.

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