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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

Eir 31-12-2015 01:02 PM

Bettering now. Dont quite remember what that post was about. Possibly distress at work. It's the main thing triggering me lately.
Bit disturbed that I dont remember. But ah well. Thanks Julie/Owen/Amy/Kate.

Kahlia1981 02-01-2016 01:06 PM

*offers safe hugs, pillows, blankets, colouring books, crayons, markers and hot chocolates to anyone who can do with them*

Thanks for joining us in the fort Julie and co.

I'm Saphira, Kahlia's 17 year old alter, here because she nearly attempted to die and disappeared inside about a month ago. She's never been gone this long and I can't be her. Just acting like her when I have to is hard and I am terrified she won't come back. My mood is really low tonight as well and all I want to do is self harm and cry. I can't do this....

*curls up with teddy bear and tries to cry herself to sleep*

Eir 04-01-2016 02:56 PM

*hugs Saphira* I've been wondering about Kahlia, thanks for letting us know. Is there anything we can do?

Kahlia1981 05-01-2016 10:51 AM

Annie - Thank you. We are heading down to Brisbane for a three-month overdue ECT treatment in Friday and are hoping that wil both bring Kahlia back and help her feel safe. Until then we're just trying to get through and keep going, no matter what. You've already helped by talking/writing to me and allowing me to be myself.

Down, tired - probably overtired - and life keeps throwing more crappy on us.

I'll be curled up in my pillow fort cuddling my bear if anyone needs anything.

Eir 05-01-2016 02:44 PM

Good luck guys, stay strong.

In other news, I'm not tired. Or sleepy. And I should be.
Pixies digging at my brain. That weird plateau where I crave hurting myself, but enough brainpower left right now to stop me from following through. Think I'm going uppppp. I'll crash.

Margo 06-01-2016 05:52 PM

*Sprays room with anti pixie spray*

xxjuliexx 06-01-2016 08:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kahlia1981 (Post 3993666)
*offers safe hugs, pillows, blankets, colouring books, crayons, markers and hot chocolates to anyone who can do with them*

Thanks for joining us in the fort Julie and co.

I'm Saphira, Kahlia's 17 year old alter, here because she nearly attempted to die and disappeared inside about a month ago. She's never been gone this long and I can't be her. Just acting like her when I have to is hard and I am terrified she won't come back. My mood is really low tonight as well and all I want to do is self harm and cry. I can't do this....

*curls up with teddy bear and tries to cry herself to sleep*

hi Saphira *takes a hot chocolates and sits near you and gently strokes you hair*

xxjuliexx 06-01-2016 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eir (Post 3992932)
Bettering now. Dont quite remember what that post was about. Possibly distress at work. It's the main thing triggering me lately.
Bit disturbed that I dont remember. But ah well. Thanks Julie/Owen/Amy/Kate.

*places a teddy near you then slides back into his sleeping bag* working suck

Eir 12-01-2016 04:17 PM

Working suck bad. Cant sleep.
Thought this year would be better. But it's already gone bad.
Maybe it's my fault.

YodaBearInterrupted 12-01-2016 04:29 PM

Back from being in the psych ward... I was a bit surprised on that fact that it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be...

Am at work right now and am doing a lil better being focused on work... but still having a rough time with everything

Margo 13-01-2016 04:57 PM

*sits and feels very alone and sad*

*hands everyone a sausage*

Eir 14-01-2016 04:17 PM

Can I sit here and be broken?
I doubt I'll ever be free. I'll never be normal.

YodaBearInterrupted 14-01-2016 06:39 PM

*sits on the couch*

Trying hard to be safe, but too emotionally broken right now

Eir 19-01-2016 01:30 PM

Just... struggling, I guess.
Keep trying to contact Dr but I talk myself out of it. Multitude of reasons. To see Dr and avoid Dr.

I'm useless.

Kathryn_Anna 28-01-2016 10:48 PM

Been awhile. Life is getting too overwhelming. I just want to be done with adulting. Too stressful.

So for now I think I'll curl up with my blanket and color for a bit if that's ok?

Kahlia1981 29-01-2016 08:57 AM

Julie & co: Thank you from all of us for giving us a safe place to talk and for just being there.

Annie: I understand what it can be like when you have a multitude of reasons to see a doctor (or any professional) and a matching multitude of reasons not to see them. Thank you for offering support to all of us and I/we really hope that you find some form of peace, even if only for a second. For me normality is something we will never achieve so I definitely hear you there.

Matt: I'm glad your experience in the psych ward wasn't as bad as you thought it would be and that you have been able to find some relief through focusing on work. *offers safe hugs and a listening ear*

Kathryn Anna: First, may I call you Kat? Secondly I'm sorry to hear things are difficult at the moment. I hope colouring and curling up is helping to give you some time away from the stresses of life.

Margo: Hi, nice to meet you. I hope that you are feeling a little better now but, and I think I speak for everyone here, we are all here if you need someone to talk to.

Thanks everyone for helping out my alters whilst I was trying to stay safe barricaded inside. I finally felt safe enough to return to the outside wall after my fourth ECT treatment in the set, partly because my doctor verbally forced me out. When I did come back out I was extremely confused, particularly about where I was and where the time had gone. Since then I've been trying to piece things together but I have noticed that my mood keeps dropping. Right now I'm guessing that my next treatment set is going to have to happen well before then normal three months but I'd rather not go through all this again.

Now I'm just going to curl up and cry with my bear, blanket and colouring stuff.

Doikers 29-01-2016 06:19 PM

*Brotherly Hugs Kahlia*

Kahlia1981 30-01-2016 04:16 AM

Thanks big brother. *hugs back*

Fairly stressed right now because today we have quit smoking. Whilst the cravings aren't too bad I just don't feel right in my own skin, not to mention that the NRTs keep giving me the hiccups..... Meh.

Doikers 30-01-2016 12:24 PM

Wow , quitting smoking's a big step , Good Luck ! (Not that you'll need it)

Kahlia1981 01-02-2016 01:53 AM

Thanks Mark. *hugs*

Right now the tears just won't stop falling. At this rate I'm going to be heading back down to Brisbane for more treatments before a full month is up. Hopefully the majority of the depression is from quitting smoking and will begin to ease as my body and mind adjust. For now I'm just going to curl up in my pillow fort to let the tears flow free.


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