Oh Jill, love, sorry for not responding before... yes, it's fine if you PM me. :) Sorry I've not replied to your last PM... bad April, bad bad. :(

Am so tired. Guhhh. Hate being this way!!!!

School starts in a little over a week.

I'm going to have to make myself function. This not even being out of bed at noon just isn't going to work.

*Hugs Jill*

*Hugs April*

*Hugs Felicia* I know how it is to just be unable to get out of bed early :( I'm finding it hard to function too .

Decisions decisions decisions!!!

*cuddles all*

Wow that was harsh Nicole, glad you can laugh at it and not get upset. Is that same person you mentioned previously??

OOhh Helen ! What Decisions do you have to make ?

Just thinking about going back to college (again!!), whether I could cope with it this time or not and stuff. I need to know that I will get the support that I should have received last time & never did. Plus there's two colleges I'd like to avoid and not sure where to go at the moment.

Who can help you with those decisions, Helen?

I didn't sleep well again last night. I don't really care though except through the night and morning when it makes me cry and get frustrated. I'd rather be a zombie anyway, maybe it will dull things down for me.

*hugs Hels* I second Lindsay, is there anyone to help make these decisions?

*hugs Lindsay* I'm sorry you're having problems sleeping

*hugs everyone else*

It's 2:30 and I'm still barely functioning. I'm like a freakin' zombie, and it's not that I don't get enough sleep at night... I sleep for like 8-10 hrs. I hate this and it has to end.

I don't know...I suppose I could talk to my personal advisor at the job centre (I'm on jobseekers) in a couple weeks time, but it might be too late for September then....

Helen , could you make an appointment to see your personal advisor sooner? Also could you get a prospectus (sp?) from any college you are considering so you could look through them and figure out what course you'd like to do ? Most colleges have like ... Open days I'll call them where you can just go along and speak to any tutors of courses you're intrested in and they will answer any questions you may have .

Felcia and Lindsay , *Hugs* I'm sorry you are feeling like Zombies, :( ,that word almost perfectly sums me up too , NUMB.

*hugs Mark* I'm sorry you're so numb. I really don't like feeling like that either. I'm not numb, I have all sorts of emotions swirling around.. only, I can't identify them at all... They're just there making me tired.

Oh, and I just got an urgent call for my mom about my cell account on my number. I feel like this means that my phone's in danger of being cut off, and I will have no way of communicating with my family while I'm at uni cause my grandparents don't really use computers. Well, **** it. I'm sick of my mother claiming she'll help me. Did she pay for uni? No. Did she say she would? Yes. Didn't she claim she would never abandon me? Yes. Who came home from uni for the summer to find her family gone? Me.

Mark, I know what college course I'm wanting to do anyway :) It's just difficult because I know of 2 colleges that do it, but their student support systems have both treated me shitty. One was before I got my GCSE results, so didn't know which college I would be attending (ended up elsewhere, which was amazing) and the other was the college I attended for a short while last year. I just can't risk it....

I'm going to search through my options over weekend and my call my advisor and see if I can bring it forward and see if he has any better suggestions/contacts :)

EDIT: Think may have found a good college, going to wait for their open days and speak to them ^_^

OOhh Felicia*Hugs* I'm sorry your emotions are all swirling:( and that your family seems to be letting you down :(

Huggles everybody. It's okay April i know u got a lot going on. Answear the pm when u can. hmm feeling low still. Curls up and crys

*Hugs Jill*

*Hugs April because I spots you :)*

I'm so damn tired.

And anxious.

And just... blah. :(

*hides where no one can find her and cries* :(

*hugs April*

So... I'm going to go watch a musical tonight. I will be back probably after most of you all have signed off for the night.

*leaves care packages on the way out*

Cuddles all. Curls up in corner. Jill needs to be strong, don't feel strong this is killing me seeing how all this is effecting everybody. Rocks back and forth mubbling Jill needs to be strong, Jill needs to be strong. =(

*cuddles Jill, Felicia, & everyone else that's struggling*

Sorry no individuals right now... am feeling pretty crap. Been a slow day on the ward, I see... guess lots of people have weekend plans or something, or are gone on vacations etc. Am "draggingly" tired myself, as it's just nearly 9pm and I've been up since a little before 6am. Never mind the fact that I took a nap. >_<

Can I have some hugs? :-S

I've had a busy day :P Well I was at my Nan's for most of the day then been paying MSN/Facebook my most attention for this evening. Should get myself to bed really.

Having an awful night with my skin & my continuing stomach pains =[