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Damnation. 20-12-2008 06:42 AM

Emma: Nah, I'm kept semi sane by talking to one of my closest friends, so my sleeping patterns don't bother me that much <3.

And thanks, lol. When I do finally go to bed, I ain't coming out again until 5pm <__<;;

Snuffles 20-12-2008 06:56 AM

Afternoon everyone...

Feeling better. I felt better after I had some red rooster chips, perhaps I was suffering withdrawals tehehehe.

Emma- take care of yourself there *cuddles* your not pathetic =)

Damnation. 20-12-2008 06:56 AM

Glad you're doing better now, Katie ^__^

EDIT: OH HEY. Someone's been showing signs of 'stalking' me in another forum.

Creepy **** ._.;

Anyway, is beddy times for me now, see you guys tomorrow *hugs all and vanishes*

Seraphsigh 20-12-2008 07:08 AM

*hands out ear muffs*
*sings to Kahlia*
Zowie, that downright sucks. There's gotta be another door opening for you...look for it.

MaryAnne, don't cry baby. Stupid he-devil. *hisses*

Sending my love to all of you...

Kahlia1981 20-12-2008 08:57 AM

Thanks D'Arcy. It's kind of you to sing to me. I won't stress about blocking my ears lol ... I sing opera for fun. My singing teacher wants me to audition for the conservatorium in BrisVegas. I don't have the self confidence to manage it though.

*offers hugs to everyone*

Bitter_Angel 20-12-2008 10:50 AM

Mind if i take a bed in the corner for a while? I could use the break.

Mary Anne 20-12-2008 11:19 AM

Thank goodness for the weekend, a friday night at a friend's house and a drink took my mind of the crappiness of life for a while.

I am exhasuted this morning, the second my body realises it does not have to get on with the going to work and doing the essentials it shuts down just now, it is 11:30am and I have not had the energy to get dressed yet (not good as it is freezing here).

*curls up under a warm duvet*

*sends some chillyness to those who are too hot and hugs everyone*

Kahlia1981 20-12-2008 11:54 AM

Does anyone mind if I just curl up and die in a corner ?? I'm really sorry for not being able to support anyone right at the moment. My every thought and breath is being spent in just trying to keep me alive, and I don't know if that is a task worth undertaking. I feel unworthy of everything. Sorry.

*hides in a corner sobbing*

Snuffles 20-12-2008 01:03 PM

*cuddles everyone* No need to apologise... we can't support everyone all the time... but mind if I join you guys? I feel like ****.. really.. I don't know why I keep drinking when I know it makes me feel like ****.. I have urges... arrrgghhhh... I feel crap... grrrr.... I dunno *shrugs* *cries*

Louise 20-12-2008 01:19 PM

there is no need to apologies kahlia, *hugs* i am so sorry you are struggling you can survive, i no it is hard, but please keep going. please do not hesitate to pm me anytime you want to talk.

Quote:

*cuddles everyone* No need to apologise... we can't support everyone all the time... but mind if I join you guys? I feel like ****.. really.. I don't know why I keep drinking when I know it makes me feel like ****.. I have urges... arrrgghhhh... I feel crap... grrrr.... I dunno *shrugs* *cries*
*hugs* drink always does that to me yet i still seem to keep drinking. i dunno anymore.

sends hugs to everyone else.

Snuffles 20-12-2008 01:27 PM

Thanks Louise, how are you? *cuddles*

Louise 20-12-2008 01:30 PM

not great at all today. *cries*

Snuffles 20-12-2008 01:45 PM

*cuddles* anything you wanna talk about?

Louise 20-12-2008 01:54 PM

it will be ten years tomorrow since my birth mum took her life, and i found her, and on monday, it is a year since my friend died.

Mary Anne 20-12-2008 02:04 PM

think my computer is having a bad day, I posted but it would not appear :(

for once had a good night last night, visited a friend, had a drink and did not cry.

*love and hugs to everyone*

Snuffles 20-12-2008 02:13 PM

*cuddles louise* I'm sorry to hear that =( Take care of yourself ok? I know it's prob hard =( just try =( *snuggles*

Maryanne- glad you had a good night =) sounds like a good night :D *hugs*

Pomegranate 20-12-2008 02:15 PM

I will respond properly to everyone later, promise.

Trying to find energy to go to a+e. Just want to crawl back into bed.

Snuffles 20-12-2008 02:25 PM

Take care Emma, hope you can find the energy to go *cuddles*

Snuffles 20-12-2008 02:42 PM

argh... i'm home alone now... alone.. alone.. I could do something.. just small.. no one would notice.. I could.. I could... argh... no no no no no.... *rock on the floor* I can't.. I shouldn't.. but I could.. *cries* *curls up in a ball*

Snuffles 20-12-2008 02:59 PM

I'm ok.. no one worry. Am off to bed. Night all *cuddles*
I'm ok...

MammaMia 20-12-2008 04:57 PM

*worries*

=\

zowie 20-12-2008 05:01 PM

*Hugs Katie*

What is it with me and drinking? I always seem to be telling you about how hungover I feel.
I do. I feel very sick and I'm going to be drinking again in about two hours x

Seraphsigh 20-12-2008 05:02 PM

Kahlia, dear, I wish you would give the conservatory a try...sometimes performing actually helps build self-confidence, contrary to what it feels like before ya get on stage! (I'm a pro musician, but NOT a singer, obviously :) ).

Hey Zowie, how are you, sweetie?

*hugs everyone and hands out nice warm blankets for good sleeping*

D'Arcy

Seraphsigh 20-12-2008 05:03 PM

*hugs Zowie*

Damnation. 20-12-2008 08:09 PM

*Sneaks in and hugs all*

Kahlia1981 20-12-2008 09:34 PM

*hugs everyone*

D'Arcy : I become someone else when I'm on stage ... I've done a lot of theatre work and I tend to become a "theatre persona" when I'm performing. Calm as and able to enjoy things, no matter what I'm like backstage.

-----

I'm sorry if I worried anyone. I managed to crash out last night at around 11pm and only just woke up at 7am .... not usual for me at all, but much appreciated. Especially with the way my head has been going lately. Sometimes I wish I could remove my head and let it sit somewhere else for a while doing it's own thing - kind of like the witch in Return to Oz. That would be quite handy.

Damnation. 20-12-2008 09:49 PM

Kahlia: x_o And how're you feeling now, any better? *Hugs*

Pomegranate 20-12-2008 09:52 PM

*hugs Louise* I hope you are managing to stay safe there. How are you feeling now?

*waves at Kim* are you ok?

*leaves hugs and cookies for Katie when she wakes up* I hope you really ARE ok.

Glad you had a good night Marie-Anne, you deserved it :)

*spots Danya* How are you today? Sleep well?

Kahlia- that would be so cool *imagines little walking talking heads everywhere* Glad you managed to get some sleep. I think the Conservatory idea sounds awesome :) How are you feeling today?

Becareful there Zowie! Have a good time! Could you alternate soft and alcoholic drinks or something? I always find having the odd soft drink and/or downing a load of water before I sleep prevents most hang overs.

Are you alright Monarkh?

*leaves ice cream for the Ozzies, hot chocolate and mulled wine for the Brits and lots of hugs*

-----------------

Spent 6 hours in a+e convincing first a normal doctor, then two psychs and then the HTT I was safe to go home. Very bizarre! Doctor calls psych which I sort of understand, two come and interrogate me for an hour or so and then call someone from the HTT to the department (this was what I found weirdest :S Are psychs not part of the HTT??? What's the difference?) who briefly interrogated me before leaving. The outcoming being three wounds stitched and I am now under the care of the HTT but my one back home? Somehow? Very strange and I don't have the energy for their **** so I am going to block their number at least for tonight. *sits and cries*

Mary Anne 20-12-2008 09:53 PM

Kahlia, glad to hear you got a good sleep.

I do some amateur burlesque dancing, on stage is one time I can completely forget about everything in my life and actaully enjoy myself, don't do it very often but very liberating when I do.

Party girl here has been out again (another good friend who is up for crimbo) but coming home to an empty house is sooo horrible.

*cuddles for everyone*

*settles down to watch a Knight's tale - I adored Heath Ledger - will make me cry no doubt*

Damnation. 20-12-2008 10:15 PM

Emma: Eh, I'm a bit wobbly. Triggered and the like, but slept okay, thanks. And I'd love to comment properly on the rest of your post, but most of the terms like HTT went over my head, tbh ._.;;. Thankfully, I've only ever had to go to A&E once, and the worst part of it was waiting to be seen so hm, not really sure what to say there

Mary Anne: Oooh, I've yet to see that. Heard a good few things about it though

MammaMia 20-12-2008 10:57 PM

HTT are Home Treatment Team...I think I had to see them the last time I went upto A&E, I dunno know though, Emma will correct me if I'm wrong no doubt.

*cuddles everyone and then hides in bed crying* :(

Kahlia1981 20-12-2008 11:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by .Poisonous.Cyanide. (Post 1298695)
Kahlia: x_o And how're you feeling now, any better? *Hugs*

Dayna : Still not feeling too crash hot. Am managing to stress myself out thinking that now that one of my friends knows my plan she is going to be watching me and making her own situation worse. Bit of the guilt factor creeping in and making the **** feelings worse. But meh.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pomegranate (Post 1298702)
Kahlia- that would be so cool *imagines little walking talking heads everywhere* Glad you managed to get some sleep. I think the Conservatory idea sounds awesome :) How are you feeling today?

-----------------

Spent 6 hours in a+e convincing first a normal doctor, then two psychs and then the HTT I was safe to go home. Very bizarre! Doctor calls psych which I sort of understand, two come and interrogate me for an hour or so and then call someone from the HTT to the department (this was what I found weirdest :S Are psychs not part of the HTT??? What's the difference?) who briefly interrogated me before leaving. The outcoming being three wounds stitched and I am now under the care of the HTT but my one back home? Somehow? Very strange and I don't have the energy for their **** so I am going to block their number at least for tonight. *sits and cries*

Emma : Yeah I'm surviving. That sounds like a very trying evening down at A&E. I hate spending any time down at A&E. I think one of my friends secretly wanted me to go up there last night but there wasn't really a good enough cause for it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mary Anne (Post 1298707)
Kahlia, glad to hear you got a good sleep.

I do some amateur burlesque dancing, on stage is one time I can completely forget about everything in my life and actaully enjoy myself, don't do it very often but very liberating when I do.

*settles down to watch a Knight's tale - I adored Heath Ledger - will make me cry no doubt*

Mary-Anne : Thank you. It's so hard for me to get sleep that it makes a wonderful change when it does happen. I love being on stage ... I guess I'm just a performer by nature. My male parental unit keeps telling me that I'm a "little actor". He's probably got a valid point. I spend most of my time pretending and acting as if my mental state is a lot happier than it really is. It takes quite a bit for me to let my guard down.
Oh, and I loved the movie A Knight's Tale. Absolutely brilliant .... I hope you enjoyed it.

-----

I've been up for about two hours, and it feels like it's been heaps longer. Blech. I still feel like crap. I feel like I'm bringing everyone else down with me. Meh. Sorry.

Kahlia1981 20-12-2008 11:05 PM

*offers Helen some safe hugs*

*offers hugs to everyone else who can accept them and would like them*

MammaMia 20-12-2008 11:09 PM

*cuddles Kahlia*

Would quite like to get drunk right now, but it wouldn't be a good idea I guess. Espically not after what happened the last time....which invloved me in crying in the loos, embrassing myself and then being walked to my sisters car, yeah, real clever.

Kahlia1981 21-12-2008 12:50 AM

*cuddles Helen back*

I know what you mean about wanting to get drunk. Although I've never been drunk. I don't let myself get that far out of control. Well not to this point in my life anyway.

MammaMia 21-12-2008 01:11 AM

*cuddles some more*

I don't recommend it, can be fun, but then tends to make you feel **** if you were already (Y)

Now I'm triggered to OD :S Damm jokes >.<

Damnation. 21-12-2008 01:11 AM

Eee, sorry about my lack of posts in here guys. Kinda distracted with drawing right now

*big cuddles to all*

MammaMia 21-12-2008 01:18 AM

*cuddles Dayna*

Drawing is good :]

Damnation. 21-12-2008 01:23 AM

*Cuddles Hells* It'd be better if I could think of a position for this girl's arms, lmao. The only things that come to mind are things that I'm struggling with XDD *still very much in practice*

Snuffles 21-12-2008 01:24 AM

I'm here now.. sorry to anyone I worried. just had a **** night >_< damnyoualcohol. I is here. Very tired. Got lots to do today. We're leaving tomorrow... EEEEEEKKKKK ONE MORE DAY AND I SEE MY FAMILY!

Just to let you know.. I'm going to be at dads for a week & a half, he has the internet but I probs won't be on RYL.. just coz.. well... I don't want him to see ;) So if you don't see me.. it's ok =) Helen can let you know where I am ;) I will be on facebook and msn.

Hope everyone else is ok.. *cuddles*

MammaMia 21-12-2008 01:49 AM

Ooooh sounds kinda fun hehe Dayna, so you good at drawing? Well I know you said you were learning though... :)

Katiiiiiiie I'm gonna misssssssssssss you

Snuffles 21-12-2008 02:21 AM

I'm gonna miss you too *Cries*

Damnation. 21-12-2008 02:47 AM

Eeee, we'll see you when you get back, Katie *hugs*

Hells: I'm okay, even if I say so myself (*suddenly feels rather bigheaded* ._.) but there's still room for improvement

Snuffles 21-12-2008 03:05 AM

Yes you will! Though if I get on the net at Trents parents place then I will be able to come on here and say hi ;)

Damnation. 21-12-2008 03:07 AM

;o Fingers crossed then!

Snuffles 21-12-2008 03:51 AM

Tehehehe yeah =) Would be good =)

Oh sorry Helen for leaving you online =( We was doing a scan and had to close msn and then we went to the shops and I came back and you were gone =(

How are you Dayna? How's everyone else?

Kahlia1981 21-12-2008 04:08 AM

Have fun on your trip Katie.

I crashed out for 2 hours again today. Right around lunchtime. I wonder if I'm trying to tell me something lol.

Damnation. 21-12-2008 04:16 AM

Kahlia: Why not go take a nap, or something?

Katie: Ehh...still triggered. A little concerned for a friend, but not really sure what to say, either. You?

Pomegranate 21-12-2008 04:33 AM

Glad you got some sleep Kahlia. I like naps.

Enjoy your trip Katie and have a great Christmas :)

How's the drawing going Danya? Hope you are managing to ignore the triggered stuff. Just let your friend know you are there, she probably already knows but I always like to be reminded so maybe it may help her/him too? Dunno....just a thought.

Yay for Heath Ledger Marie Anne! Hope you had a good evening.

*pokes Helen* Hope you are asleep girlie!

----

Helen is right HTT= home treatment team, used to be called crisis team. I just feel so....bleh. I can't sleep and I am supposed to be working in a few hours. I just don't know how tomorrow will work. My body is so agitated but my brain is just exhausted in every way. Triggered :(

Damnation. 21-12-2008 04:41 AM

Emma: I'm doing the colouring for it atm. Bit of a longwinded job, seeing how I have a habit of doing things in a cack-handed fashion, lol.

As for feeling triggered, trying to ignore it, but tis rather difficult when my mind keeps going 'grab a blade grab a blade grab a blade grab a blade' and so forth x_x.

And yeah, my friend does know that I'm here for him...but I think he's upset about something that I haven't experienced. So I just sort of feel a bit helpless D:


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