RYL Forums

RYL Forums (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/index.php)
-   Veterans Board (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=34)
-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

FlyingNy 19-09-2010 05:33 PM

I'm sorry Jill I hope it all goes ok for you. You're not a screw up, everyone makes mistakes and it might not have even been your fault. I don't know what it was, so I can't say for sure, but you're not a bad person. Please do keep hanging onto that edge. We're all here to help you.

Doikers 19-09-2010 05:42 PM

*Hugs Lia* Thankyou Lia :) I'm going to try really hard to not injure today.

Also , You won't be burdening us by telling us your problems , we are here and we want to help if we can :)

shadowedsoul 19-09-2010 06:09 PM

hugs mark:please stay safe
hugs april: try not to worry about me okay
hugs lia. erm part of me doesnt want to hang on. part of me wants to fall.cant handle much more. =[

SoMuchMore 19-09-2010 06:35 PM

*hugs lia, april, mark, jill, lindsay, oliver, and everyone else*

*fades away*

Doikers 19-09-2010 06:47 PM

*Hugs Laura*

SoMuchMore 19-09-2010 06:56 PM

Thanks Mark *hugs back* i really need hugs today. I've got to pull it together for my interview and work this afternoon.

FlyingNy 19-09-2010 06:58 PM

*Hugs Laura* Good luck with work and the interview.

*Hugs Jill* I'm sorry you feel that way and I'm sorry I can't make it any better, but it won't feel like this for ever. You have to cling to that.

Doikers 19-09-2010 07:01 PM

*Hugs Laura Loads* Best of luck with work and your interview :)

FlyingNy 19-09-2010 07:19 PM

Thanks Mark, I know I can come here, I just don't feel right giving out my own problems when what you all need is support, not more on your plate.

shadowedsoul 19-09-2010 07:25 PM

thanks lia, i hope your right. curls up and shuts eyes hoping thses stuiped thouhts will go away.

one_step_closer 19-09-2010 08:03 PM

I'm so, so low. I don't want to accept that I have BPD (I only found out on Friday when my medical records that I requested came through, no one thought to tell me.) I should have recognised the symptoms. I do anything to avoid abandonment, my SI has gotten worse, and I have overdosed 11 times this year. My psychologist kept hinting that I might have it but I know that he knew because there was a letter sent to him when I was diagnosed.

Doikers 19-09-2010 08:07 PM


I only found out on Friday when my medical records that I requested came through, no one thought to tell me
That sucks Lindsay , you SHOULD have been told when you were diagnosed . I'm sorry you had to find out like that and that you are so very low :(

misskitty112 19-09-2010 08:10 PM

*hugs everyone*
I harmed last night. At my grandparents house. With my brother asleep mere feet away from me. What the heck is wrong with my brain anymore?

I need to try to write more in my blog about everything going on in my head that's bothering me, but it's exhausting.

Am I allowed to give up yet?

Anyway, I took some pics with my brother this weekend, since I never see him anymore.
The following content has been hidden - Reason : pics

I miss him already... again.

Doikers 19-09-2010 08:21 PM

I'm sorry you harmed Felicia *Hugs* Theres nothing wrong with your brain , it just sounds like you were very very triggered.
No you can't give up yet ,please hold on :)
You and your brother look like you are having bunches of fun though , thats so cool :-)

misskitty112 19-09-2010 08:27 PM

Eh, yeah. I worked an auction Saturday evening for my grandparents (they're auctioneers) and it always really triggers me, cause no matter my job, I can't keep up. But at least I get money, I suppose.

I'm holding on, but everything keeps piling up and I can't even explain it.

And yeah... we were super bored on the way to church this morning. Yay for my grandparents living out in the country! So... to keep us occupied, we took pictures and tried to make Star Wars parodies of songs on my ipod.

Doikers 19-09-2010 08:37 PM

Well I'm going to go to bed , I've spent much of today there but I hope I'll sleep well and feel brighter tomorrow .

Star wars parodies ! sounds fun :) *Hugs*

*Spots and hugs Kahlia and Oliver*

SparkleKitten 19-09-2010 08:53 PM

I got a voulenteer place with kitties, can do whatever I want with them and due to previous experience in a vets with the quarrantine and isolation ward I might be able to work with less healthy more attention hungry kitties, so excited about it. Mums annoyed at me because I'm going to go with kitties and that I won't see my nan friday, even though I decided missing a 2h tea friday is better than missing 8h Saturday or 4h Sunday with my family, but no. Apparently Sunday would be better. *sigh* I'm just glad I'm able to do this, it should be really good for me to get to help people out, and cats out. Might get a place talking to the public too after a few weeks, which would be lovely. I really do crave a career in animal care but I'll never be a vet and after years of mum telling me I must go into a well paid job there's not much else, most animal care jobs are like 15k per year... I don't know what I want to do really, just got this degree to get through first.

shadowedsoul 19-09-2010 09:01 PM

cuddles all. nevermind being stuiped

shadowedsoul 19-09-2010 11:22 PM

curls up and crys

FlyingNy 19-09-2010 11:43 PM

*Hugs Jill tightly* Do you want to talk about it honey?

I need to know something. Why can no one else see it? I am covered in dirt, it's all over me. I'm a monster. A disgusting, horrible, worthless monster but no one else can see it. They all think I'm nice, caring, but I'm not. I screw up people's live and try time and time again to tell them what I really am before it's too late but no one believes me and I don't understand it. How come no one else can see it?

shadowedsoul 19-09-2010 11:57 PM

hugs lia tighly back. erm got really stuiped thoughts running through my head. erm want to go to sleep and not wake up. please =[ sorry

FlyingNy 20-09-2010 12:02 AM

I'm sorry you're feeling so low Jill. Is there anything you can do to distract yourself? Please try not to do anything stupid. I'd miss you. *Leaves jar or hugs for later.*

Scarletdreamer 20-09-2010 12:03 AM

Lia, sweetie, you aren't what you say you are. I know that my telling you that probably won't do diddly-squat but... I do believe that you are kind, caring, thoughtful, & sweet... no matter what you think of yourself. I have seen no signs, none whatsoever, of you being a monster. I just hope that someday you can see you the way that I see you. *cuddles* How are you doing tonight??

Jill, don't do anything stupid, please? We would all miss you if you did... although that being said, I do understand the desire to not be here anymore. :( It hurts... and is scary... but you can work through it. *hugs*

Sorry for not replying to more of you... except *big hugs* to Laura, since you said you needed them. <3 And *cuddles* to everyone to whom I didn't reply, so sorry. :( I wish I had the energy to do epic replies but lately, been totally lacking in energy of any sort. :( Sorry. :'(

Past 3 nights I've cried (including tonight). Feel so stupid doing so, like I'm weak etc., etc., etc. WTB additional parents. :( Probably some of you all do too. Sorry to whinge on about this, it's just that it hurts.so.damn.much and I'm not quite sure how to get over it. :'( Probably gonna update my r/v with my sorrows and woes so you all don't have to put up with it here. :-/

*hides in the warren where no one can find her*

shadowedsoul 20-09-2010 12:15 AM

hugs everbody, sorry this isnt fair, forget i said anything.

Scarletdreamer 20-09-2010 01:52 AM

I can't do this anymore.


Kahlia1981 20-09-2010 02:04 AM

*huggles/waves at all*

Feeling a bit over it at the moment.

Just thought I'd share something interesting. A surgeon in the "fair" country of Australia is planning a legal class action aimed at banning cigarettes in Australia along the lines of action taken by victims of asbestos against James Hardie. If it was achieved - which would set an interesting precedent, the government would be forced to pay out billions in damages/compensation to smokers and help them to quit and so forth. They'd also lose trillions of dollars a year in revenue from cigarette sales. So it could be extremely interesting.

anarchistl0ve 20-09-2010 05:27 AM

*hugs to everyone* i wish i could take all your hurts. I would be sad if i heard any of you passed on.

risenfromperdition 20-09-2010 05:57 AM

hey becca =]
how is you?

xxjuliexx 20-09-2010 07:14 AM

*sniffles* hi all

one_step_closer 20-09-2010 09:57 AM

*hugs everyone*

I'm starting my first day as assistant team leader with the Prince's Trust. I don't feel like I can do this. My social skills and leadership skills are rubbish.

Doikers 20-09-2010 10:04 AM

*Hugs Sarah* That sounds like a super cool kitty placement , Congratulations :)

*Hugs Jill*

*Hugs April after finding her in her corner of the warren* You CAN do this , it's hard but you will get through it .

*Hugs Lia*You are not covered in dirt , You are a kind caring person and help out tons here .

*Hugs Kahlia*

*Hugs Lindsay* Good luck with the princes trust !!

*Hugs Julie*

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Becca*

*Hugs everybody else*

one_step_closer 20-09-2010 10:17 AM

How are you, Mark?

Doikers 20-09-2010 10:37 AM

*Hey Lindsay*
Well today I rang up for my repeat perscription which I hate doing as I feel I'm on so many meds it's embarrasing, so I've already accomplished as many chores today as I did in all of yesterday :) I just have to stay out of bed all day like I ended up doing yesterday, We'll find out how it goes , I want cheese roll for lunch I think so I have to go to the shops for a roll . and some cheese heh, I'm just trying to get the motivation to go out hmmm

CrazyHayley 20-09-2010 11:12 AM

Hey there my fellow wardies, sorry for disappearing on you all for a week, not really sure what happened....am now waiting in for people to come and connect me to the communial digital ariel in the block of flats, exciting times at the prospect of TV to watch again, not quite so exciting waiting in for strangers to come and mess up my flat. But it could be worse, gotta focus on the positives, right?

Doikers 20-09-2010 11:21 AM

*Hugs Hayley* I don't like having strangers in my flat either , but enjoy a toilet that flushes , well enjoy might be the wrong word lol .Engineers are coming on Wednesday for insulate my walls , I guess they're doing all 4 flats in the building , I hope it can be done from the outside as I've appointments out on Wednesday .
How have you been Hayley ?

CrazyHayley 20-09-2010 11:29 AM

*huggles Mark* Ah hope insulation goes ok, at least you'll be nice and toasty in the winter for the inconvienience they cause. I've been keeping my brave face on, just. I started a blog at my friends reccomendation, thinking it would be better for me than my RYL journal, but I've not written in either in a week, cos if I type the words out, then it makes it more real. DENIAL is where I'm at right now and its working, kind of....

On a random note, Reggie bit my bottom this morning, it bloomin hurt! LOL!

Doikers 20-09-2010 11:36 AM

Lol , sorry but did you almost sit on him ? how else did you make him bitey and give him access to your bottom? :P

Hmm in Denial , I understand about not likeing to write things out , I have a R/V thread and a blog but rarly update either :S

CrazyHayley 20-09-2010 11:45 AM

I spy Kahlia *huggles!*

No Mark, I didn't nearly sit on him, I was already sitting on the floor, giving him quality bunny time and it was going well, he was licking my face and hands as he usually does, but then hopped round the back and just decided to bite me! Cheeky bugger. He was in a nibble anything and everything mood this morning, a few of my books and DVD cases have teeth marks in from this mornings antics.

My M.E symptoms haven't been good over past week, my tolerance of laptop screen isn't holding up at the mo, so I'm going to go for a fag break and then a rest in the denial tent. I may be back out later, though I've my 4year old godson's birthday meal to go to later, so I may not get the chance.

Thinking of all my fellow wardies and wishing them well *huggles/waves depending on what you're comfortable with*

RYUU 20-09-2010 01:29 PM

*hugs everyone* The devil is telling me to hurt myself dont know what with my husband is with me so am safe

Doikers 20-09-2010 03:14 PM

*Hugs RYUU* I'm glad your husband is there to keep you safe :)

misskitty112 20-09-2010 03:24 PM

*hugs everyone*
I swear, one day individuals won't feel so daunting. I just can't get the concentration to do them right now.

So... this week will be busy, in addition to class and work, I have to go to the bank, call my credit card company to find out why they rejected my online payment and didn't tell me. I really have the money to pay my bill, I promise, so it's not that. I have a meeting today, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. I *may* go on a campout this weekend. Haven't decided. I have to write at least 3 pages of my Brit Lit paper (I still don't have a concrete topic though...), read my history chapter, read 2 chapters in Marketing and do a company case, read a Journalism chapter and keep up with my newpaper logs, go to counseling, and get my meds straightened out... Oh! and my Witchcraft minicourse starts Friday.

Whew... so... good news, I won't have time/energy to deal with the cleanup of harming...
Bad news: I may not sleep... at all.

And on another good note, we finally made it to the Renaissance in my Brit Lit class! I finally understand/like the literature! =)

Doikers 20-09-2010 03:29 PM

*Hugs Felicia*Busy busy bee :) Good luck


Oh! and my Witchcraft minicourse starts Friday
That sounds like fun!!!^^^^

misskitty112 20-09-2010 03:36 PM

Mark, yeah, I think Witchcraft may end up being my favorite course this semester.
The professor who's teaching it is also trying to do a Revenge Tragedy minicourse in the spring and his facebook status the other day was "needs to focus on his Witchcraft, but can only think of Revenge."
Only from an English professor is that status not scary. haha.

risenfromperdition 20-09-2010 03:40 PM

*waves at everyone and curls up in corner sleepily*

misskitty112 20-09-2010 04:13 PM

*waves at Heather and gives her a blanket*

Doikers 20-09-2010 04:42 PM

*waves at Heather and hands over a pillow* Are you comfy ?:)

risenfromperdition 20-09-2010 04:47 PM

yahuh. except not for real cuz silly library chairs not comfy >.<
and gotta has lunch at some point =\

FlyingNy 20-09-2010 05:07 PM

*Hugs all*

I know this is gonna sound insane since she doesn't even exist and all that jazz, but Sam and I are still fighting. I feel betrayed by her I guess. She's the only person who I can really relate to and feel she really understands me, but I don't understand what she did. I see why she did it, but I don't agree at all and it's as if I don't even know her anymore. No matter how well you think you know someone, they will always come out with surprises that leaves you questioning everything you thought you knew. I don't know what to do about it, I can't change it and she's not even sorry.

MammaMia 20-09-2010 06:15 PM

*hugs ward*

So upset, it's unreal =[

Doikers 20-09-2010 06:28 PM

*Hugs Lia* You don't sound insane Lia,not at all

*Hugs Helen* Whats happened?

All times are GMT +1. The time now is 05:15 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.