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Ravyn: Not doing too bad thanks. Today's been one of the better days, actually. i didnt SI last night AND I've been comfortable wuth eating. So I'm pleased. I'm glad that your Christmas has been good, in spite of being triggered *hugs back*
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Dayna: Glad to hear you had a better day :) Thanks for the hugs
*hugs* |
You're welcome ^___^ *hugs again*
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How's everyone doing today?
My day's not been too bad, had a bad night though... woke up incredibly scared thinking that my mind was going to be taken over... took me quite a while before I felt safe -- in the sense that I wasn't going to be attacked-- but eventually ventured back to my bedroom and went to sleep. Tired today though. *leaves lots of hugs and some hot cocoa* |
Sorry you had a bad nights sleep Ravyn. Glad you did manage to get back to sleep though. How are you doing today? *offers you coffee?*
------------ I just triggered myself. What the **** is wrong with me? I am not normally like this, I promise. I am sinking further and further. I am actually contemplating driving back to uni sunday just so I can properly hurt myself without worrying anyone will find out. Its the only way I can do the damage I need. |
Hello, everyone!
Consider all of yourselves individually hugged. Hang in there, darlings. Rayvn, hope you can sleep better tonight. Emma, all that stuff your dad said is f***ed up and I'm sorry that you had to be subjected to that. Seems you are incredibly strong, so I know you can see through it, but I'm thinking of you and hope that you are doing better. Everyone else: I hope that you all are recovering well from whatever the holidays brought you (including hangovers!) My parents live only about 15 minutes from me, so we spent most of Christmas eve and Christmas together, which was pretty nice. The only problem is that I get massively triggered when I hang out with my mom a lot (there's a lot of suppressed anxiety and negativity in our relationship...kind of passive aggressive) and I can't seem to get out of it now that I'm back to work and alone. I was seriously snapping rubber bands on myself all friggin day. Trying to get out of that now...feeling very on edge. Still, could be worse. Well, I'm still hanging out here for the sake of being with friends, even if its not real life :(. xoxoxoxoxo D'Arcy |
*cuddles everyone in the psych ward and gives them some chocolates*
Hope ppl r okies there xxx |
*Crawls in and hides in the corner*
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Hey everyone.. just less then a week till I'm home.. miss being here...
Am so stupid.. had two nights of drinking.. first night was ok.. actually that was xmas day I think.. but last night was absolutely shattered. managed to hold in a breakdown.. but.. I dunno.. still feel really seedy, why do I keep doing that to myself?? Got money from dad but it had to go on car insurance.. am so shattered hey. We've nearly run out of money, we use way more petrol down here coz it's just **** here lol. But hoping trent gets paid just before we leave coz we need more money for petrol to get home.. Miss home.. and I miss mum soooooo much.. Feel urges at the moment =( |
My new trousers arem black with white outlines around the pockets and up the sides. They've got lots of zips which I like.
Another thing made me feel so fat on Christmas day. My neighbour asked me if I was expecting. Bah. |
I think I'm dragging myself into some **** again. ****. What do I do? Can't tell anyone. Telling that one person was one too many >.< Writing this post isn't a good idea either....:S
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Hi everyone :)
Thanks for the coffee Emma, and I did sleep much better last night, only woke up once. How are you doing today? Hope you're feeling less triggered. Thanks for the hugs D'Arcy - glad to hear you had a nice xmas, sorry to hear that you got triggered though... :( Hopefully that passes soon. I like hanging on here too - I love talking with you all! Jem - how are you doing? Thanks for the chocolate.. mmm.. i looove chocolate!! Hope everything is ok with you. Dayna - *massive hugs and cuddles* What's wrong? Katie - I miss seeing you around here too! Hope that the rest of your holidays go well and that you get your money for petrol. Zowie - those pants sound sweet!! Sorry about the comments from your neighbour. How's your day/night going? Helen - *hugs* I'm not sure what's going on, but we're here to listen if/when you feel ready to talk. *hugs and cuddles to everyone* I'm doing alright today, but then again it's only 9:00 in the morning.. lol.. haven't been up to long to feel otherwise, I think. My internet is going in and out though, so I may not be back on here for a bit... hoping I can post this message... :S Take care everyone!! |
*hugs everyone*
Hells - love you so damned much sweetheart. You know where I am if you want to talk. ----------------------------------------------------- I feel like absolute crap. I've had hardly any sleep in the past few days. Since I came home. Triggered all through christmas day, all through boxing day, and I gave in this morning. Ended up with stitches. But it doesn't matter. It's never enough to make me feel better. It just screws everything else up. Like, it upsets my boyfriend, and... I dunno. I don't feel like I should even be posting here anymore, I never give anyone any support. |
Hi everyone,
Helen, hope you are okay. I am on one day at a time living just now, struggling a bit, trying to get out at least every day, even if it is only to the shops (I am smoking sooo much just now that is essential, must must stop). Prmosied I will go back to the gym in the new year (until things went awry I went 5 times a week). Have just developed horrible ear ache (maybe due to the extreme cold here, minus 6). *hugs everyone tight and hands out earmuffs to the cold* |
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-hugs to all-
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*Glomps all*
Sorry my posts have been so sparse as of late. Been getting fairly involved with doing lots of drawing, lol <__<;; Ravyn: Had to skim back to see the post you were referring to. Um, I was extremely lonely. Had one MSN conversation going, and it kept trailing off into silence that lasted for up to an hour at a time, and since it was a time where no one else was online, I was craving someone to hold a decent conversation with |
*hugs everyone*
Helen, I know you are not 'okay' in the traditional sense, just hope you are safe. Going to visit my aunt's grave today, as it is far away this will be the first time since the funeral in July, will be good to see family but painful at the same time. x |
*jem walks into the room and hands over mashmellows to ppl who want them*
*cuddles u all* xxx |
Ugh sorry... no replies at the moment... only can get on for quick posts and selfish me devotes them to talking about me in them. Lol!
Am stressed though. Just talked to a school friend I haven't seen in 6 months and we have no money to go out to dinner.. Just had an argument with BF about money.. Which I know.. I just wanna do something nice.. since I haven't seen him in 6 months. I said I can pull some money out from my savings (which yes may be a bad thing, but we just need like 20 odd dollars.. and we dunno when trents getting paid, might not be TILL the day we leave so that's abit late hey) so yeah had an argument, he said he'll get the money off his dad and I'm like but he's paying for dinner on NYE so no. I had said to Trent hey he went to this place and said it was good (we went there awhile back and sam hadn't been there..) but then he gets up me and is like but we don't have the money for it!! And I'm like I KNOW! I wasn't suggesting it.. I was LETTING YOU KNOW HE"S BEEN THERE AND WHAT HE THOUGHT OF IT... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR so over it.. so over having no money.. so over dealing with mental **** that prevents me from working while I'm studying.. so over everything.. just wanna curl up in a ball and cry... cry hard.... |
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