oooo scratchy stich *use it to itch my back*

I'm sorry I missed Aprils last post do you know what page it's on? I'll check it out , there were so many posts last night that I coulden't keep up when I logged back on .....

*offers scratching stick around*

Julie, that's okay. How you feeling honey??

Mark, I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I'm feeling pretty bad too. Feeling pretty anxious & still feeling bit suicidal and really drained. So you're not alone. We'll get through all this somehow. She last posted on page 1233 I think. As Laura replied to me after my replies to April.

I read Aprils latest post on her R/V Thread , I'm worried now too . She will probably come back here this evening , I THINK she is 5 hours behind us in the UK and could be at her parents so maybe can't get online so easily.

I spot an Oliver !! *Hugs* how are you?

*hugs knees and shakes head* i'm fine

Mark, that's a good point.

Julie, you sure you're fine? :(

*hugs knees tighter and shakes head* um....

*Shuffles up to Julies side and Hugs*

We're here if you want to talk :)

*yawns* morning all. (and yes, i know for us in the UK its 5.10pm, i have no idea how i managed to sleep this late :/

"Morning" Nicole , how are you ?

EDIT: I Spot a Kat *Waves*

*ambles in and spots a mark* hullo. hows you.
*cuddles nicole* i wanna sleep. 'morning' hun. hows you?

*hugs mark and kat* im feeling.......ok..today. how about you? and kat, my mum has just gone to bed for a nap :/

Hi guys , I'm strugging to some extent , been thinking of a suicide plan , I'ts been .......I mean I feel that I'm falling into another depression and I don't know how to stop it . My plan has been rattleing around my head for a couple of months . sorry.

I'm gald you two are feeling ok , could you take a nap Kat?

a nap is a tempting idea, but hazel has to go down for one first, she was up for 7 hours straight earlier so is extremely tired. then I have to cook dinner and pack for our 'family holiday'..*rolls eyes*

I know the feeling mark...not that i'd tell anyone here...because of hazel...i know i wont do anything about it...but it still makes me feel pretty crap. What you need to do is look at how the plan WONT work.

*hugs mark* please dont carry out that suicide plan? is there anyone IRL that you can talk to and tell that you're struggling?

I'm trying to force myself to think that way but it is SO hard sometimes . I'm sorry your feeling that same way Kat *Supportive Hugs*

I don't want to end up back in hospital , I am just hoping these feeling go away . soon. If I told any of my supprt team they might want me to go back to hospital, I'll just keep on smiling on the outside , it'll get better right ? It has too .......

*cuddles mark tightly* please dont act on any of the plans. If you feel like you are please tell someone or go to the a&e... You are an amazing guy. Please try to stay safe. You don't have to fake being happy.. thats how things get bottled up.. then you might explode all over the place. And yes, things will get better eventually, it just takes time. So hang in there hun.

*cuddles helen* how r u doing today?

*hugs JK* I really appreciate your reply hun. I'm sorry that you are struggling so much atm. I know its really hard to get caught up in here sometimes when the posts come so fast. But remember, if you ever need to talk I'm just a PM away.

*hugs kat, nicole, kahlia, julie, and lindsay*

I spy Oliver!

Ugh... studying day. I'm glad that I get done with my finals on Tuesday. Although everyone here is jealous that I dont have any on Wed-Friday. I can't wait to be done!