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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 09:02 AM

Thanks. Hope things are better for you than for me..

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 09:06 AM

*nods* i'm fine

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 09:10 AM

I wish I was fine no idea what is bugging me, **** its 4am. I hope I dont screw her over I dont want her to let down her son...

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 09:13 AM

wat do u mean ace?

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 09:15 AM

Becca has a son he is just a baby, he has a playgroup on tuesday mornings at 9am until noonish. I will feel even more **** if she dont make it.

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 09:26 AM

can u try reading to clam ur brain
computers keep ur brain awake

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 09:30 AM

Not without waking up her husband or the baby. If I wake the baby i wouldn't forgive myself hell if they miss his playgroup I wont either. I guess my only option is to take part of a xanax and hope I fall asleep.

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 09:38 AM

i'm not very good at sleep advice lol

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 09:40 AM

It is kind of comforting that you are trying most would have given up and said you are on your own now. Half or even smaller of a xanax is looking most likely my route to sleep.

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 09:54 AM

i hope u do get some sleep hun

Doikers 08-06-2010 10:32 AM

Hi I'mjustme *Waves*
.
*Hugs Heather*
.
*Hugs Kahlia*.
.
*Hugs April* It can realy help to verbal vomit , just get everything out somtimes.
.
*Hugs Helen*
.
*Hugs Oliver*I'm sorry you depression is hitting again :(
.
*Hugs Anarcistl0ve*
.
*Hugs Crimson* I'm sorry you're so angry , your situation sounds infuriating , Thanks for the nighttime hugs :)
.
*Hugs Kat* I'm sorry you are struggling so much :( and I agree with laura 2 weeks is a real acheivment ! way to go you !!
.
*Hugs JK* I'm sorry you cut , please try and look after the wound and try not to cut again if you can help it .
.
*Hugs*Good morning Julie , how are you?
.
*Hugs Ileana*Could you try you mental health team ?, or if you don't have one your GP could maybe refer you to them.
.
*Hugs Ace if ok* If taking the Xanax help you should do it to get some sleep , I sometimes have to take meds for sleep .
.......Did you get any sleep?

wolfos3d 08-06-2010 11:19 AM

This assignment is so not working right now. It's already two days past my extension. What excuse to try this time? "My life fell apart"? Too much information in that one. They don't need to know.

MammaMia 08-06-2010 11:44 AM

*cuddles all & curls up*

shadowedsoul 08-06-2010 11:48 AM

Argh!!!! I can't do this anymore, I just want to hurt
myself badly.really don't know what I'm doing anymore,
don't see the point in this anymore, need to get the hell
away from here, just wish I knew a way to make that
happen.

Doikers 08-06-2010 11:58 AM

*Hugs Helen and Shadowedsoul*

MammaMia 08-06-2010 11:59 AM

*hugs Mark*

I spy an April <3

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 12:09 PM

*huggles everyone* glad that it was tidied up, no argument... i was worried that we'd have another one and then people would be scared to post how they feel... which would be bad for somewhere where it's supposed to be safe. :-/

jess, i'd be honest with "them" if you can... if your life's truly fallen apart, then just let them know the bare minimum of details that you need to. i've found that most people are pretty understanding (at least in the uni setting) about stuff like that. i don't know though, if you're talking about uni or something else... hopefully what i said makes sense though. i've been honest with how i've been doing for four out of the six years i've been in uni, and it's been okay. sorry if my advice is crap though. :-S

jk, sorry you felt that way last night... hope you're getting some sleep now. *cuddles* and thanks for the tlc... it means a lot. :)

sorry for the lack of individual replies. you all deserve so much more than i can give. :(

i feel like crap... thus the lowercase letters. that's usually what it means. that i feel like crap and vulnerable etc... :( i don't know why i feel like crap, i just do... it's awful. i did my "don't want to" thing yesterday (cleaning the toilet) and was "supposed" to feel great after it but i didn't, i just kept feeling like ****.

i have to meet with my site and faculty advisors today... i'm terrified... it's at 10am, a little under 3 hours from now. :-S i don't know what to do, what to say... i'm really really scared. i don't want to be told that i have to stay longer at my internship because that's only going to put off res. i'm so worried and i know that it doesn't help anything but i can't help it really... :'(

*hides in a hole* :'(

Fallen kite 08-06-2010 12:19 PM

Just made the mistake of putting ' Simple Plan-welcome to my life' on. i was readin through the last couple of pages and saw someone post the title and got curious. bad idea lol.

feel so alone and empty. cant even hurt properly inside thanks to these stupid meds. dont get it.

so what is this virtual Psych ward anyway? it intreeged me as it comes up in the list with my blog everytime i search for it (its called 'blah blah blah, i hate myself, who cares?' if anyones interested.)

Doikers 08-06-2010 12:24 PM

*Hugs April* I JUST missed you on Facebook sorry :( literally by seconds

*Hugs Fallen kite* HI I'm Mark.

God my dad just visited and makes a bee line for my P.C. , I know hes trying to help me get more RAM but he had NO respect for my privacy . got me all pissed off , had to take a Diaz :(

wolfos3d 08-06-2010 12:43 PM

Thanks April. *hugs* I'm at Tafe finishing my VCE. I know I should tell them. I'm just a little nervous about doing it. Everyone has been telling me how well I've been doing all year and it feels like I'd be dissapointing them if they were to find out otherwise.

Good luck for today.

nicole94 08-06-2010 01:11 PM

*curls up*

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 01:52 PM

Heya Fallen Kite... the Psych Ward is basically a thread where we keep track of each other and how everyone's doing... a safe place to air out feelings (although if it's going to be a long post then a ranting/venting thread in that forum would be better, I think - a lot of us have them), and also just to hang out and make friends. :) I hope that makes sense... :-S Brain's not working too well at the mo.

Mark, so sorry that we just missed each other. :( *cuddles* But I did send you an email. :) How are you doing? I'm sorry that your dad doesn't respect your privacy more... :(

*cuddles Nicole* What's up, sweetie?

You're welcome, Jess. :) Anytime. *hugs* Hopefully you can talk with them (whoever "them" is) and see about getting another extension, or something, I don't know. I'm not sure of how things go in Australia... it all seems so very foreign to me. ;) Hehe...

I'm getting really nervous now... an hour and I'll be heading up to campus. I so wish that WoW were up instead of down for maintenance because then I could distract myself... as it is, I am so tired and stressed... and I really really want to SI... :'(

*spies Nicole* :)

*hides in the warren* :'(

nicole94 08-06-2010 02:04 PM

*cuddles april*
i cant do this anymore :( my mum only talks to me when she wants to have a go at me for something, and my sisters constantly being nasty to me, i need to get away but the only place my mum will let me stay is at my aunties, and i dont feel comfortable around my uncle, my therapist is going on holiday so im not gonna see her till the 21st, and i just wanna end it all! :( *cries*

Doikers 08-06-2010 02:04 PM

*Hugs Nicole*

*Hugs April* I'm thinking of you :) try not to worry too much .

wolfos3d 08-06-2010 02:13 PM

"them" would be my teachers. I probably should have mentioned that. I think I'm gonna be in a huge amount of trouble for handing this in late. I said I would hand it in on monday and it'll be Wednesday in an hour. :/ Oops.

shadowedsoul 08-06-2010 02:48 PM

Hmm iam at work and all I can think of his how much
i want to hurt myself, how flipping pointless all this
walking around in a daze feeling very numb. Damn it I
want to cut. *curls up and cries*

MammaMia 08-06-2010 04:07 PM

My anemia is playing me up rotten today, don't know what to do :'( Can't take my iron pills as won't be ready til Friday. ****ing bollocks =[

Doikers 08-06-2010 04:28 PM

I ran into a Nurse from the pysch ward 2nd day in a row in Morrisons , just freaked out , left my shopping came really fast back to my flat and took a Diaz , which I hope kicks in soon, I'm STILL really low and the woman who does the accupunctre nocticed and took me to one side and asked if I was ok which nice., But meeting the nurse has bought back thoughts of being in hospital , I SO Want to cut , I shouldn't but I NEED to , going to lay down till Diaz works

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 04:53 PM

Just don't know what to do with my emotions... Inside, I'm all over the place and I just feel numb and stuff.
My urges are coming back, really strong as well.

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 04:57 PM

Quote:

i feel like crap... thus the lowercase letters. that's usually what it means.
i do the same thing... took me a while to notice i did it though. a few times i went back through and edited to fix it but now i don't bother...

sorry fallen kite. (sorry don't know your name) the simple plan post was me. *waves welcome*

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 04:58 PM

*cuddles everyone needing one*

*curls up in a ball and hides*

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 05:19 PM

*cuddles Crimson* What's up, sweet?

*cuddles Hels* I'm sorry about the anemia... it's odd that you can't just get iron pills from the store, over the counter, because you can here. Bummer I can't teleport you some!! Maybe eat some red meat or leafy green vegetables in the meantime? to help raise your iron levels?

*cuddles Kathryn* I'm sorry that your emotions are so frustrating. :( Sorry, don't remember exactly what you said, brain's a sieve I swear!! :( I hope that you are doing kind of okay now...

*cuddles Mark* I would be freaked out seeing nurses etc. from hospital too... especially for the second day in a row!! Are you feeling at all better? I hope so... :( I hope the diazepam helped a bit... do you feel paranoid at all? And next time your SW comes, PLEASE tell him how poorly you've been doing, even if it means having to ask to have a private moment with him instead of having that med student with him. Please try, at least? *extra-special encouraging cuddles*

*cuddles Jill* I'm sorry that you're feeling so crappy... hopefully as the day goes along you'll feel a bit better... do you know what's making you feel the way that you are?

*cuddles Nicole* I'm sorry that your mum and sister aren't getting on with you... once again, don't recall exactly what you said, but hopefully things look up soon. :( I wish I could help somehow... but please try and take care of yourself. You're important to us... and we care about you.

I think that was everyone who posted since I last did, and if not, I apologize, as I said, brain's a sieve and I'm really anxious so I think I did okay!! :P *cuddles everyone else who wants cuddles*

My meeting with my faculty supervisor and site supervisor went well although I was so effing anxious the entire time. :( I was SI'ing like crazy... found a "new way" that isn't too noticeable. Not gonna say what on here though, but it helped... didn't leave any marks but helped. :-/ I feel like a failure for resorting to SI though... anyway, can it be called self injury if it doesn't leave marks?

I have a NP appt this evening... SO anxious about that, don't want to go. She knows that I've been cutting (but doesn't know that I cut this morning... :-S neither does Jarrod) and I told her that I'm passively suicidal again... I'm really worried, I know I won't go into hospital but I CAN'T STOP WORRYING!!! :'(

Okay, back to stapling Parent Resource Guides... must get a lot done... must look useful!! :(

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 05:25 PM

Don't worry, my brain's a sieve too (:
I just have no idea what I'm feeling... As my friend says, its like I'm living in a daydream... Which I am, actually.
I'm alright, just a lot of internal conflict that I'm trying not to show externally.
Hope you're okay too (:

MammaMia 08-06-2010 05:27 PM

Why do I have to have these thoughts when I feel okay? Well apart from the stress, worry, migraine & anaemia (Y)

*hides and pretends they don't exist*

SoMuchMore 08-06-2010 05:34 PM

*cuddles and hides with helen*

I'mJustMe 08-06-2010 05:49 PM

*Takes hug. Gives her own to anyone who wants them.*

Sure, you can call me Lia. I don't mind. Today I am feeling...I don't really know. I don't know a lot. Nothing really. Just scared as usual. So scared.

I think I am going to go and to some writing.
x

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 05:51 PM

not much new april just sick of it all. oh and the 'perk' that david doesn't connect the dots of what he's picked up on or what he's said. *rolls eyes* i dunno... i prefer him not knowing how bad i've been feeling when i am but his theories and statements don't help either...
The following content has been hidden - Reason : examples
"you aren't that fat." "i was talking to some friends and we've established that you must be cheating on me... you don't want it here so you must be getting it from somewhere else" "oh are you not eating tonight?" there's more but i'll not drag on...

i'll stop whining about it. it's not worth whining about.

MammaMia 08-06-2010 06:28 PM

*cuddles Laura tight* Will reply to your pm in a bit sweetie, love you xx

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 06:55 PM

*yawns* morning

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 06:56 PM

g'morning julie

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 06:59 PM

grr who wants to make 220 dollars fall off a tree? :P pref before june 30 lol

CrazyHayley 08-06-2010 07:00 PM

*dives in through an open window*

Haha! They thought they could keep me from you by sorting out my mood disorder, but they were wrong, nothing keeps me from my wardies!!! Been thinking of you all and you've all been in my healing prayers. I wish that there was more that I could do for you all, but at least its something....right?!

I've ordered myself some pizza as I think I'm going to have a night on WoW. So I'll share the pizza with you guys, though its without cheese to be vegan, lol, but obv in the ward it'll be calorie free and you can add what you want!

I did a bit too much yesterday and as a result fell asleep on the sofa even with huge amounts of caffiene in my system....Reggie was out....when I woke up, he'd chewed through my yoga mat that was blocking some wires and chewed through the wire to the wii sensor bar!! Not good!! Naughty Reggie, but he's still sooo cute.

*goes around ward giving appropriate tlc and care etc to all her fellow wardies*

For those who want to join in......"GROUP HUGGLE!!!!" .....
*GROUP HUGGLES WARDIES!!*

*settles down in the corner to play WoW and wait for pizza*

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 07:06 PM

oh animals lol. how're u

Doikers 08-06-2010 07:09 PM

*Hayley HUGE HUGS* I knew they coulden't keep you away from the ward :) I'm going to try and get a REALLY early night 7.08pm take anyone as early , I feel **** but If I don't sleep I'll pop by later . If I don't just get "out of it" eg sleep I could well do something stupider , like more cutting ,

Haylay soon we will have to play WoW together for a bit if you like , I'm almost level 18 :)

frenchhorn 08-06-2010 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CrazyHayley (Post 2341504)
Been thinking of you all and you've all been in my healing prayers. I wish that there was more that I could do for you all, but at least its something....right?!

Please respect my wishes that I don't want to be in anyones prayers, I have already said this, don't worry you may have missed when I did.

*joins in group huggles* Enjoy the pizza and WoW Hayley

*hugs Mark* I used to freak out when saw old counsellors who I hadnt liked, its understandable, I hope you've managed to calm down a bit now.

*hugs April* I'm glad your meeting went well, I hope the appt with your NP goes/went ok

*hugs Heather, Julie, JK, Laura, Nicole, Helen, Lia, Kat, Crimson, Jill and anyone else he has forgotten-really sorry*

I opened up in counselling today, ok after a didgy start of not speaking, my counsellor asked what I wanted help with and I said about moving on from the past and he asked me to talk him through an experience from it, so I did, it was really hard and for next week I have to write a letter to the bullies from school to write down how it made me feel.
I'm off to my youth group in a min. so best dash

I'mJustMe 08-06-2010 07:55 PM

*Joins group hug*
Not even in the mood for writing anymore, now that IS weird.

How's things?
x

katnovia 08-06-2010 08:39 PM

he's a stupid idiot. fancy letting the little ones talk to him and be out around him when hes not even ****ing awake enough to ****ing take any notice of them. Stupid ****ing idiot. How ****ing dangerous is that? he doesn't even know lotty and what she could be like. I dont give a **** that he was dreaming and got confused. he had a CHILD there and he ****ing told her to stay away from the building and the fire! what the **** is the poor girl going to do other than run?! IDIOT. we cant stay here. its not ****ing safe. and we cant go anywhere else. Now amy is stupidly suicidal because she couldnt cope before this and now lotty is in there somewhere shaking and sobbing her eyes out because shes terrified. she went outside and that terrified her more and then he had the stupidity to get ****ing angry at the poor thing.

shouldnt rant. ****ing mad.

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 08:48 PM

Hey what's happened Sarah?

I'm Sapphire by the way

katnovia 08-06-2010 08:55 PM

lotty came out to kats stupid husband after rosie was talking to him, and instead of being ****ing intelligent and looking after her, he stays ****ing sleepy and doesnt even bother to wake up properly. so hes half asleep and she doesnt know it and the idiot tells her to stay away from the building she asks why and he says stay away from the building and the fire and so she runs out of the house in terror. He goes out and finds her sat on the step frozen in fear because shes realised shes outside and hates it. so he gets angry because she wont come in because shes basically ****ing paralised with fear. so shes in now, completely wrecked and its got to amy cos she was already in a state over the bastard who raped her repeatedly and the stuff that was going on the other night and now shes stupidly suicidal. its the best miel can do to stop her harming us badly, shes gone on a right si phase and the idiot is still asleep. kats broken down completely and doesnt know what to do. jess is trying to calm lotty and rosie is looking after baby so that leaves muggins here to try and hold the fort.

CrazyHayley 08-06-2010 09:14 PM

sorry Oliver I must have missed it when you said about no prayers, I'd never do anything to intentionally go against peoples wishes or beliefs. Hope youth group went ok.

*Huggles Kat* gosh things sound in an awful pickle for you and alts....no words I'm afraid though.

"til next time wardies!"
*toddles off* (out the door this time though!)


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