*Hugs Y'all*

*sits with zeddeh*
hey lovely one <3 how you doin?
*offers hug*

*Hugs Heather*

hello,
anyone here

How are you today, Laura?

*hugs Lindsay* how are you?

I'm not well, feel like a walking time bomb. I'm more dissociated than here. Doin skills a lot, but it's only working as long as I'm doing them. Walking is funny when you don't really feel your legs, but I went for a walk for more than an hour. Being outside is helping... as long as I'm outside. It's freezing cold here (we got the air from Siberia... said the weather person). I'm going to my best friend for the night now. She can help most of the time. I think I'm going to walk there (45min) and freeze a bit more, at least then I feel something.

*hugs Laura* I hope it helps to see your friend.

I'm trying to deny my feelings at the moment. Don't want to know how bad everything is.

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Laura*

I'm...not here, IDK how to describe it.

*hugs Lindsay* how are you now?
*hugs Mark* are you dissoziated?

Spending time with my friend helped, as long as I was there. I'm feeling even worse than yesterday now.

I don't know Laura , I hadn't even considered that :/
*Huggles*

*hugs Mark* I can't know cause I'm not there, but it could be a kind of dissoziation. Not all dissoziation is bad you know, my therapist said that it can be useful at times. Does it feel like you can't connect with anything, like you are kind of floating or as if you are under water? I get that sometimes, but I'm not sure if that's dissoziation. Do you like being not here or do you want to come back to 'here'?

I wanted to be "here" but then Didn't I've no clue . *Hugs Laura*

*hugs Mark* are you more 'here' now than not here?

I'm about to go to bed.

I think this is a really good thread. I'm going to commit myself to posting here daily....at least until I'm 'safe.'

I'm not doing too well recently...had a suicide attempt on Friday, kind of have that feeling you get when you're about to trip over your own feet. That right before you fall feeling. I have a friend who's been making me go to her house nightly cause she doesn't trust me to be on my own anymore. I should consider myself lucky. I don't know just not feeling the whole...life thing lately. :(

Anyway thanks for listening.

*Hugs Laura* I hope you slept well.

Hi Abrokenone , I'm Mark , *Hugs if okay*

*hugs ABrokenOne if ok*
*Hugs Mark* I did get to sleep, but then I woke up and felt like ****. Still feel like ****. Why is life so shitty for me? I guess it's my fault isn't it? 3 hours until I get to see my therapist.

how are you?

*Hugs Y'all*

Thanks for all the hugs. I wish I had better news. Still feeling all the alone/sad/hopeless crap. The site is helping though....some people really just do want someone to listen to them. Just for a second even. *Hugs EVERYONE*

*Squishes Laura*

*Hugs ABrokenOne*

*squishes Mark*
*hugs ABrokenOne*

how are you both??

I had therapy yesterday and I really didn't like it.