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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 12:41 AM

write about my weekend? I went to the british motor show thing, and then there was a meatloaf gig in the evening, which was absolutely awesome. And this morning... I went to church, and I... I found where I belong. I felt acceptance, people want to help me. I... I even spoke to people there again about my scars. They.... I'm not used to this...

Had a bit of a... wobble? on friday though. One of my mates tried to do something unspeakable to another of my mates... and it bought back memories, and flashbacks of my past... but... he's truly sorry for what he did and he's in a bad place at the moment but... I hate him for what he did, yet I still want to help him. ****ed up, much?

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 12:48 AM

Ally... you need to go... you need it. You really do! *pets lots*

Shadow...motor show would have been wicked fun! And meatloaf too!!!! I'm glad you've found somewhere you feel accepted *pets lots* It's okay to want to help someone that you really hate.... it really is. just shows that you're a better person than you think!!!! *cuddles*

blondiebear 04-08-2008 12:49 AM

I'm crying in part because a friend showed me a story she is writing and it reminds me so much of my teen years.

Crying cause I don't want Jeff to go. We all say negative stuff here, it is where we can be ourselves and be safe! No matter how bad or how angry or how sad or desperate or how needy we feel.

Jeff, I think you totally underestimate your value, the soft heart inside you. You've totally given yourself to us to cry on and pound on. Please stay? Please?

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 12:52 AM


~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 01:16 AM

Aww, auburn, sounds like you had quite an upsetting time on Friday. *cuddles*
I am glad to hear about your experience at church though. I'm glad you are even able to talk to folks there about your scars. Wow. I haven't been to my church all summer... I love those folks dearly and I know the feeling is mutual... But it's too hot for long sleeves and wearing my gloves screams 'look at me, I SI'... And I'm pretty sure none of them know... Oh, sorry, lol I think I'm a little jealous.

*sigh* but Jess I don't want to go... wanna come with? Think you could make it up here in 15 1/2 hours? Lol

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:18 AM

I wish I could love! I really do. Do you have a friend there who could go with you? Do you want my mobile number so you can text me or something???

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 01:22 AM

Yeah, being able to talk to them about my scars and everything, well wasn't exactly my choice, one of the youth club leaders walked in on me almost chucking 4.5 months down the drain and slashing my arms up, but these things happen for a reason, I suppose.
Yeah, Friday was difficult. Thursday had been a friend's funeral, so to have all that on top, almost pushed me over the edge, but my friend, she has such great parents (not that she sees it) and... they almost treated me like their own daughter.
wow. just writing this out, it makes me realise just how many people there actually are that care about me.

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 01:29 AM

Going to go to bed after this, I think. Try and sleep, but before I do, something from friday night that's bugging me:

What makes a person a "bad" person?

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 01:31 AM

Oh Auburn, I'm glad writing that out helped you realize that you've got so many folks that care for you.

Aww, Jess *snuggles* no, no one to come with me... Tbh I think if any of my friends were to come if be mortified... You're different cause you understand this stuff. And I'd TOTALLY take you up on your mobile number... But I'm already out of text messages for this month :pinch:. I've decided that, when I'm caught up on my mobile bill I'm going to get unlimited texting... Cheaper than going over all the time and besides, if I had it set up already if be able to 'take you with me' tomorrow :-)

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:31 AM

Lots of people DO care about you and i'm glad that you are seeing that. It's why writing stuff out is good!!!! *pets lots* i hope you get some decent sleep!

A bad person... hmm... I suppose it depends on what context you mean it in.

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:33 AM

honey, do you want me to give it to you anyways? that way you DO have it. and you can use it if you get desperate?

Auburn Shadow 04-08-2008 01:35 AM

I don't particularly know what context exactly, but I was just thinking about what my friend said to me after he'd done that "thing" to her. He said he was truly sorry for what had happened and did it make him a bad person, but... well truthfully, I don't know if it does or not...

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 01:37 AM

I don't know. I really don't. I don't know how any person can say whether or not a person is a 'bad' person. It's just... i dunno, something that we don't have the ability to truly judge.

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 01:53 AM

Mmm, bad person, that's tough... Esp not knowing the context (and no, you don't need to share, I respect that it's private).

Hmm, sure Jess, why not. If I don't use it tomorrow I'm sure there will be another crises one of these days. We can swap, then you can text me if you need a sholder.

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 02:04 AM

okays sweetie :) i'll pm it to you now!

effervescence 04-08-2008 02:28 AM

bleuuuuuuuuurrrrghhh i feel sick

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 02:29 AM

Yes, my phone bill is just about enough to make a person cry :pinch: I need a job very soon... *crosses her fingers that her interview is soon and that SafeWay wants her*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:04 AM

what's up chlo?

*pets ally* it'll be good!

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:07 AM

*curls up in corner*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:10 AM

*glomps sophie lots*

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:12 AM

*is glompped* (sp?)

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:25 AM

you'll be alright sweetheart

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:27 AM

maybe. id ont know

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:31 AM

i do. don't take that defeatist attitude sophie. you KNOW you can get through this!

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:32 AM

i dontk now anything atm

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:35 AM

what on earth happened in the last half an hour to make you suddenly feel like this?

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:36 AM

i dont know

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 03:41 AM

*snuggles Chloe and Sophie*

Chloe, did you manage to see your doc? I'm sorry you're still feeling sick.

Soph, what happened sweetie?

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:43 AM

it's in a thread Jess made for me in vets support and ED forum.

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 03:45 AM

*hunts around for thread*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 03:46 AM

8cuddles sophie*(

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 03:47 AM


~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 03:58 AM

Found it. But I'm useless atm although I can offer hugs.
*cuddles Sophie*

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 04:00 AM

thanks, i saw your reply. hugs are fine. i dont want to talk about it atm though so i hope you wont push me to.

~*forever_broken*~ 04-08-2008 04:43 AM

Oh, no worries Sophie, I have a 'no pushing' policy. I do hug a lot though :-)

*sits in her corner and pouts because she does NOT want to go tomorrow*

BoundNoMore 04-08-2008 04:43 AM

*hugs Sophie*

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 04:43 AM

*hugs you*

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 04:44 AM

you guys are wonderful
*is hugged and hugs back*

All I'm Living For 04-08-2008 04:46 AM

i've got to go but you guys take care *huggles lots*

blondiebear 04-08-2008 05:05 AM

*hugs everyone*
*makes sure blankets are folded away tidily*
*kickes off shoes*
*leans against her part of the wall and weeps for many reasons.*
*holds bandanna to face and sobs*

BoundNoMore 04-08-2008 05:15 AM

*sits next to Blondie... gently rubbing her back*
I'm here if ya wanna talk about anything.

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 05:33 AM

*snuggles next to susan* what's up sweetheart?

blondiebear 04-08-2008 05:39 AM

brother jeff

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 05:42 AM

oh sweetheart, he will come back. he will....

blondiebear 04-08-2008 05:51 AM

i can only hope but i really don't know

BoundNoMore 04-08-2008 05:52 AM

huh... did I miss something?

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 05:53 AM

he will come back. have some faith! he WILL come back.

BoundNoMore 04-08-2008 05:55 AM

What Happened????
Where's My Daddy????

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 05:56 AM

nothing has happened dearling, jeff is just in a bad spot at the moment. he'll be back though. don't worry *cuddles*

Casper_Fading 04-08-2008 05:58 AM

I've got to go home now but i'll be back on here later. *leaves lots of hugs, cuddles and snuggles for everyone*

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