Hey, I finally have my internet up and running again. Feeling really low and suicidal and I can't confide in my psychologist because he is on holiday for 4 weeks. :(

*creeps in*
hi all, I have just got back from hospital, feeling really triggered still and really want to OD again, but am trying to stick to the care plan a psych nurse set up with me while I was in hospital. They don't think I have done any permanent damage to my liver, but I had to be on 3 different drips as the meds level in my blood was really high.

*hugs all who want hugs*
*waves to Angel* don't think we have met, Hi I'm Oliver

*Hugs Oliver* I'm glad you are out of Hospital Mate.

*Hugs Lindsay* Are you all moved now hun ? PM me anytime okay , I'll always listen hun :)

*hugs Laura* I hope the med change helps.

*cuddles Lindsay*

*huggles Oliver* I'm glad you didn't do any serious damage to your liver.

*hugs Mark* I'm less muddled today, which is good since I have to go to my kids' new school for a meeting today. But last night wasn't so good. D said that in August I had to go get my license. Usually I only have driving related panic attacks or the like when I am actually trying to drive in a town... After he said that though... It was not pleasant.

How are you guys all doing?

I'm sorry Crimson Hun :/ *Squishes*

I didnt even know there was an eclipse last night!

It's been cloudy and rainy for the last 3 days here, Angel, so we didn't see it either.

*hugs Mark* I'm better now just wish he got it. He says he understands but its like he thinks I can just get over it so he doesn't understand at all. But then he also is of the belief that I'll be fine and I don't need meds or anything like that. Just because I am highly functioning even at my low points doesn't mean I'm ok and can do everything by myself. /mini-rant

Sometimes I feel better and it feels like I made it all up but then something happens and I'm at that point and I know I am and was definitely ill... anyone else ever feel like that?

*tackle hugs Laura* Yes I remember you :) I remember pretty much everybody that used to be on here regularly! How are you doing?

*hugs Mark* :) Hope you're staying safe and out of trouble! Does April still come on every now and then? How has she been?

*waves to Charlie* Hi! I'm Taz :)

*glomps Crimson* I'm going to try :) It was triggering me for a while, which was why I initially left, had to try and get myself stable before I could expect to help others. But I'm in a much better frame of mind so I'll try to stick around and help out! How have you been? In terms of the driving, is it possible for you to drive around town for little periods of time leading up to the test? Maybe it could help lessen the anxiety? I need to get my full license in under a month - a little nervewracking, but I'm fairly confident in my driving... even given the fact I got into an accident in October ><

*waves to Mute.Scream* Laura, is it? Hi, I'm Taz :)

*hugs Lindsay* (or Lindsey? >< Sorry - I can't remember) Sorry to hear you're feeling suicidal hon. If you need somebody to talk to, go ahead and pm me. Please stay safe! <3

*hugs Oliver* Glad you're out of the hospital and that your liver is still alright. Good job on trying to follow through on the care plan. Is there anything in particular that's triggering you?

*waves at Angel21* I don't think I've caught your name yet - Hi, I'm Taz :) I wasn't even aware there was an eclipse last night! It's too bad - I would have loved to see it :(

*hugs to everyone else wandering in and out of the forum*

Hey Taz I remember you, its really great to hear your doing so well :)

I can drive just fine in places that have little to no traffic but between almost being in a fatal accident (if I hadn't gotten out of the way in time... it was close) and knowing other people who have had bad accidents I just freak out. I am confident in my own abilities so I drive fine outside of town, I just don't trust other people's abilities. D's had a license and hasn't got the issue I have so why he refuses to be bothered to get one but insists I 'get over it' and get mine is frustrating and infuriating.

Taz *Hugs* April has been staying away from here as she found it was triggering her but I have her on FB and she is still about :)

I miss April :Emoticon(14)::Emoticon(14)::Emoticon(14)::Emotico n(14)::Emoticon(14): though I can't complain too much I have her on WoW if I would just be bothered to play more often.

hugs everyone, hi taz,

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OH I played with Hayley on WoW , I miss her .........I miss April too.

*Claims a bed to hide under*

*hugs Mark* How is Hayley? I haven't heard from her in forever either...
*hugs cantchillax (if okay)*

thanx. they are totally allowed.

*Hugs Crimson I don't know how Hayley is , she has not replied to my last 2-3 texts but should she be in touch I will pass it on.

*Hugs Cantchillax* Hi I'm Mark :)