I'm so scared of looking at the graft tomorrow.

How would you feel about not looking until it's a bit more healed?

Need to know how much has taken and so I've something to compare it to next time to make sure it's progressing.

That makes sense
Good luck today - remember to talk to the DRS or nurses about how you're feeling, they will have experience with helping people come to terms with the changes. X

How are you doing?

Have to stay in another night.

Have come off the ward for phone signal.

May go walk about even thpugh I'm in hospital pj's.

How are you feeling about staying another night?

I'm sad cos I'm really missing bertie. I understand it'd be pointless to go home now and ruin it but I'm sad.

The arm doesn't look as bad as I thought it would but it's not pretty.

My mum is being a nightmare and it's made my fragile o mood crash.

I'm sorry your Mum is still being terrible. How are you today?

Sorry to resurrect this.

I've finally managed to secure a cmht appointment on thursday. How can I get across to them that I need supportING? That I am not coping. People say just be honest. I am honest and then I get no support. How do I be the correct sort of ill for them to support?

I don't think you can do anything more than be honest. Tell them that you are desperate for some support and need it to try and move forward with things. You could also say that you keep asking for the support you need but you haven't got it. Maybe that will bluntly tell them that they have fallen really short. Will they have notes about what has been happening for you recently? I really hope they offer you something useful.

Maybe you could have a checklist of direct questions that you want to be answered, that you can refer to at various points to help get the conversation back on track if necessary? They can gloss over a statement, but it's less easy to ignore a question! For example:

- what regular support will I have?
- can you help me with finances/benefits?
- who do I tell if my self harm is escalating and I need help, and what will that person do?

I really hope it goes well with them. I would suggest trying to be blunt and persistent if it seems to be going towards them trying to brush you off with no support. That's not fun I know, but sometimes it's the way to get things done. And well done for getting an appointment sorted- that in itself took some persistence!

That's good about asking questions.

I also want to ask for PRN or different meds.

And I need practical help very badly. Very very badly.

Will you write down some things? That way you can let them keep it at the end so they have a copy and if you haven't managed to go through everything they can read what you've written.

I also am beginning to get intense suicidal urges.

Because of everyone ignoring me asking for help I got sectioned and lost my job and my relationship with parents deteriorated. I'm now unable to afford literally rent and bills. Never mind food or anything else. I have no local friends. Have lost friends. And we'll what's the point in fighting anymore?

That's a lot to be dealing with and I'm sorry people weren't there for you to try to help avoid some of those things. I really hope that you will be offered something useful on Thursday. I think there is a point in fighting even if it's not clear what that point is right now. Please focus on staying safe and doing nice things for yourself.

I think it might be a bit blunt to be like, because of the lack of professional support all of this happened and it could have been prevented, I need something ongoing. But I also think given the continued lack of support you are getting, it might be worth being blunt with them like Jenna also said.

It's not fair of you to have to ask for help time and time again and only get help when it's a life and death situation they can't ignore. Maybe you could ask what type of ongoing support they could offer, and say you are open to anything. If they try to say you won't find it helpful, maybe tell them that you want to try anyways because you really need ongoing support.

Plan to say I need ongoing practical and emotional support starting today as in the day of the appointment.

I feel very low. Very pointless.

Good luck with tomorrow, I hope they hear you.

I'm sorry you're feeling low and pointless, are those feelings connected to each other?