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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

yoyogirl 11-08-2013 10:11 AM

Checks back in

midnightphoenix 11-08-2013 08:41 PM

This is endless I self harmed again :/

Synthetisk 12-08-2013 11:03 PM

I went to the beach today and it was kind of terrifying because I felt so negative.

YodaBearInterrupted 16-08-2013 12:41 AM

*hugs all in here and places some goodies and juice on the table*

I am tired of all this crap... its so damn unfair... I give up trying to fix myself

m0nk 21-08-2013 06:08 AM

i havent self harmed for some months now and i feel like im becoming a ghost chasing a dream of what i was not. my eyes feel like they are not sleeping yet always awake. i have never fealt more that i needed to scream than this. everything i feel and want to think to give me joy or happiness decays and my head grows stronger for imaginating dreams my ghost keeps chasing. i think i finally know what having no friends feel like. its empty i want to fill it with something nice i can view from a distance and realise that its actually empty and smile about it. everybody is trying to brainwash me with simple words just to tilt me in theyr supposedly right direction for my own life choices wich i refuse. and i have had a feeling for so long now that i believe that the meds im takin gives me the illness everyone says i have or had for a long time before they started me on meds wich i didnt. i felt normal before i gathered into psychiatrics care again. i was normal and i want to run away with a scissor and i want to cut off my hand with it behind a tree in the midst of the darkest night with the twisted image of a higher presence trying to talk me out of it using high pitched swooshing sound in the wind. no one hears me no one talks to me. ever since i started medisine everyone's hope of me taking care of myself without anyones help is a shot in the dark. since no one has been there for me talking me out of my mind. where was anyone when i had illusions in my mind, where was help when i scurried as a confused little child onto my room and started tearing up my flesh. they all just laughed and thought i'd had fallen down from a tree. i wasnt accusing myself of falling off a tree and making a 20cm long scratch on my left underarm. they just assumed it was therefor. guess im just lonely. so afk. this side medicine isnt of use to me anymore. since i know the psychosis of the whole treatment it doesnt flinch me for 1 second anymore. it gives me psychoactive trauma and makes me easy influential from other people for brainwashing. thats how exposed i am. and nobody couldnt give a **** about me anyway. its a open door here as im listening to evanescence breathing time as we know it of as air. ;(

m0nk 21-08-2013 06:20 AM

long story short. the dude that gave me medicine induced a psychosis on me making me believe i cant die a meaningfull death if that should occur. but here i am smoking the **** out of my lungs making me into a position thinking i need to get cancer to die a meaningfull death if i do someday.

i had no problems after i stopped drugs before i was given medicine. the nerve on some doctors is insane ;( didnt even give me an evaluation.

Kittyenna 24-08-2013 04:26 PM

No matter what happens I always end up back here, things are falling apart all over again and I can't cope

yoyogirl 26-08-2013 10:53 AM

Checks in for another few days its gonna be a long road

Slip 26-08-2013 06:57 PM

Me & my doona will be in the corner if anyone needs me...

YodaBearInterrupted 02-09-2013 12:48 AM

Yeah... this is really going to be a problem week... and my journal writing isn't helping at all when I am debating myself... bad bad bad... make it go away, make it all stop

Kahlia1981 02-09-2013 08:44 AM

Checking in

switching off the brain full of suicide plans, dates and details would be a lovely idea but at this point there is no such hard reset except the final one

YodaBearInterrupted 04-09-2013 05:12 PM

This is not a good week... make the sh*t stop... so many voices in my head. I am trying really hard to be good and not do bad things, but I slipped up last night and now I wonder if that is making it all worse

yoyogirl 04-09-2013 11:22 PM

Feeling a lot better today which is good feel so good still need that big hug

YodaBearInterrupted 05-09-2013 12:53 AM

*gives big hug to skinnylove* does that help :) love the sig by the way, one of my fav movies

yoyogirl 05-09-2013 09:11 AM

Thank you

Kahlia1981 07-09-2013 11:07 AM

She won't stop screaming. Just constantly screaming in my ears. I want her to stop and she won't. The only way I can see for this to end is for her, or me, to go.... It needs to end now

YodaBearInterrupted 07-09-2013 02:47 PM

*hugs Khalia* I am sorry to hear you are having a rough time *hands you some goodies*

Kahlia1981 08-09-2013 05:33 AM

Thanks Matt *hugs*

I can't get a break from her. She just won't stop. I don't know how to decide what is her commands and what my head's telling me.... I need her to shut up

m0nk 08-09-2013 11:12 AM


yoyogirl 08-09-2013 07:30 PM

Checks in here for a long while, anything is better than being outside or at home

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