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Laura2.0 25-01-2012 07:19 PM

why aren't you allowed to say that you are suicidal?

I'm not sure what exactly is making me want to cut again. It's been on my mind a lot. I put my tools somewhere hard to reach so I don't get tempted too easily, but at the same time I started to have one with me almost all the time.

one_step_closer 25-01-2012 07:47 PM

I find that when you're trying to give something up it can be on your mind quite a bit. What have you used so far to help you through the past nearly three months? Try and build on those things.

I'm not allowed to say that i'm suicidal because she might interpret it as meaning i'm going to kill myself right now.

Louise 25-01-2012 08:32 PM

hugs everyone

Laura2.0 25-01-2012 08:34 PM

*hugs Louise* how are you?

*hugs Lindsay*
Could you tell her that you are suicidal, but not going to kill yourself right now? Or instead of telling her that you are suicidal you could tell her that you are thinking about death.

I don't know what I did. I wasn't triggered and I dunno. I 'just' didn't do it, I didn't do anything instead though. I stopped when I went inpatient August 30th, but slipped 3 times during my time at hospital. Maybe I'm thinking about it so much lately, because I'm not allowed to feel bad here at home.

Cazki 26-01-2012 12:24 AM

I'm fed up with this place i have to go to. Its awful. So stressful. Oh well i guess il just have to hurt myself again if i get stressed. They havent caused any hassle yet but its just being there so long it drags and it makes me feel worse.

Doikers 26-01-2012 11:39 AM

*Hugs Louise*

*hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Ian*

one_step_closer 26-01-2012 11:51 AM

*hugs everyone*

I very carefully worded an email to my psychologist about how I am feeling and asked how to get help but she still misinterpreted it and said that I was threatening suicide. I feel like i'm in big trouble now.

Laura2.0 26-01-2012 09:05 PM

*hugs Ian*
*hugs Mark*
*hugs Louise* could you write a reply telling her that you aren't threatening suicide, but that you need help and don't know how to get it? When is your next appointment with her?

one_step_closer 26-01-2012 09:43 PM

I told her that I wasn't threatening suicide. She said i'll just have to contact the people who would have the least worst outcome. I see her again in just under 2 weeks but it doesn't even help to see her, or anyone else.

How are you today, Laura?

Laura2.0 26-01-2012 09:48 PM

what does she mean with 'people who would have the least worst outcome'?

I'm impulsive today. I like it when I'm like that. I felt like baking cookis at 7pm, so I did that.

Doikers 27-01-2012 10:45 AM

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Laura*

Laura2.0 27-01-2012 08:12 PM

*hugs Mark*

one_step_closer 27-01-2012 08:25 PM

Least worst outcome I think just means the people who would lead to the best of the not so good outcomes.

How is everyone today?

Laura2.0 27-01-2012 08:47 PM

ok, I get it now.
who could that be? For me it would be my best friend.

I dunno how I am right now, except that I'm tired.

Doikers 28-01-2012 10:27 AM

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Laura*

one_step_closer 28-01-2012 11:38 AM

*hugs everyone*

I don't feel like I can contact anyone. I have no friends who would listen so it would have to be a helpline or the crisis team but i'm very anxious about making phone calls.

PurpleSmurf 28-01-2012 11:17 PM

*checks in *

* leaves Hugs Carebears and Hersey Kisses for everyone*

Doikers 29-01-2012 11:46 AM

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Purple Smurf if Okay?*

one_step_closer 29-01-2012 01:08 PM

How is everyone doing?

Laura2.0 29-01-2012 07:39 PM

*hugs Mark*
*hugs Lindsay*
*hugs Purple Smurf*

I passed a lunging exam today! I'm suuper proud of myself, cause I won a bet, too :-)
Only bad thing about today is that I have a headache and painkillers aren't working :mad: so I'm just drinking lots of tea and water.

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