Thanks guys.
Didn't get back to sleep for ages.
Then when I did, it was not-so-nice dreams.
Fun.
=[

I got kicked out of college.

*peeps put*
*decides its still too cold and dark so crawls back in*
The denial tent is a great place...you can come in and pretend everything is ok and its just a nice safe place to be.
Halloo Hells and Emma ^_^
I hasnt seen you for a whiles...I missed youuuuu!!

I sent my UCAS off today (FINALLY!!)
The happiness is wearing off now though :/

Yuck

Zowie how come you got kicked out hun?:( *hugs*

Oh zowie *hugs* what can you do now? I'm sorry =(

I feel like ****.. have a headache and just generally feel like crap.. sorry guys =( Was so triggered this afternoon grrrr. Am going to bed in a min. Take care, will talk in the morning *cuddles all*

Zowie I'm sorry. That's terrible news. :sad: Is there anything you can do ?? That really sucks.

Katie I hope you haven't gotten a bug like the one that I and my housemates have been going through. It's nasty. *offers safe hugs*

We just got back from taking our landladies dog for a walk. We found out that if I jog a little he will try and keep up with me. Then we wait a little while for Nicole (mouse in darkness) to catch up and she would give him attention, "which made him excited so he would run", and then off we would go again. For me it was quite a nice walk/jog but I have a feeling that we tuckered Rusty (the dog) out.

It's 21:30 here and I'm not yet tired, but with the late evenings I've been having, the early mornings and the weird sleep cycle that I'm presently developing it isn't very surprising.

Well you're all welcome here to come see the snow :)

Zowie *hugs* sorry to hear about uni :(

Katie I hope you feel better soon and Helen I hope you can get some more rest; disrupted sleep sucks!

Alexx, the denial tent sounds great... *crawls in*

*pops head out*
Kahlia, glad to hear you had a great walk/jog --hope you are able to sleep well... maybe ask D'arcy [Monarkh] to sing you lullabies :)

*leaves hugs for all and crawls back in tent*

Sorry to hear that Zowie :(

The he devil visited last night so I had a rubbish night and had a good cry, then slept in this morning to missed my morning coffee :(

*crawls under duvet to cry some more*

They just said I didn't hand in enough work to prove that I can pass the course.
I guess now I'm gonna go on jobseekers allowence until I find a job, I'm also applying to DLA which I'm hoping I'll get.
Then in September I'll probably take an access course in humanities.

On a lighter note: I'm one month free today!

xxx

*hugs Zowie* (Arwen?) Congrats on being a month free :D That is amazing! I'm sorry you got kicked out of college though. I have heard good things about the access courses and am glad you aren't giving up on your uni plans.

*passes Marie-Anne a tissue* Are you alright under there? Is the crying helping?

*cuddles Snuffles* (Katy?) I hope you have managed to get some sleep and feel a bit better when you wake up.

*helps Alexx wipe the dust off all the denial tent's furnishings* Glad you have applied to uni hun. Where and for what courses? (if you dont mind me asking) I hope you manage to cling onto the happiness for a bit longer x

P.C (Dayna?) - How are you doing today? Hope you managed to sleep ok.

How are you doing Kahlia? Sounds like you had fun walking the dog! Hope you managed to get some sleep x

Hells- very proud of you for trying to sort out your sleep patterns hun. Don't let this set you back. Maybe going to bed before 10pm was a bit ambitious and you could try just going to bed before 11 or 11.30 or something? Hope you are ok over there x

ravynsoul- how are you? you support so much, how are YOU doing?

*hugs and cookies for anyone I have missed*

-----------------------------------

Thanks for all your kind words last night. I have no idea why I picked a row with them, I think it just hit a nerve that they were talking about being ashamed for and picking on this girl because she was 'weird' and dressed differently. It just annoyed me. Alcohol probably didnt help situation either.

I had this idea, plan that I needed to SI in a certain way which would have been quite bad and got me in quite a lot of trouble with a+e but went to bed before I carried it out. Guess this should be good but it doesn't feel like it. I am currently still sat in bed, in the dark because I can't find the energy or drive to shower or get dressed or buy food or any one of the dozens of things I have to do :-(

Zowie: x_o I'm sorry to hear that, but congratulations on your one month free!

Emma: (You dun mind if I call you so, do you? ._.) I think I'm actually okay today, thanks. Slept okay, had a bit of a wobbly mood-swingy moment before I got online, but now I'm here, I'm actually okay. Fingers crossed it lasts!

How's everyone else doing?

Course I don't mind :) Glad you are doing ok. *kicks wobbly mood-swing for you* Hope it lasts for you too. You sure you are ok? Your 'I am currently' thing says unsafe? You can tell me to mind my own business if you like, was just wondering x

Zowie: congratulations on your one month free *throws a party for you*

Mary Anne: I hope the tears help you. *offers safe hugs*

Emma: Yeah I did enjoy walking/jogging with the dog. Normally I don't have anyone that wants to keep up with me when I start jogging so it was kind of fun.

I did manage some sleep last night. But I had problems both at the start and the end of the night with my coughing. You think I'd stop smoking like a chimney while I'm sick wouldn't you ??

I partly want to try and get back to sleep, but I don't think it's going to work. Oh well.

*hugs her ATP drinking buddy*
Emma you are SO not an attention whore... sometimes you need to take care of yourself and let others support YOU and there is nothing wrong with that.

*prepares a tea tray with tea, coffee, cocoa, cookies, cakes, chocolate, and anything else one might want and leaves it in the middle of the room, then returns to her corner and stares blankly out into the snow*

Oh and Zowie, yay for one month free!! *massive hugs and extra chocolate for you*

Zowie, congratulations on being one month free :D I know how hard it is to get there, so well done :D I'm also sorry you got thrown out of college, but I really hope you don't give up on your uni plans, they'll always be there ready for when you are :)

Mary-Anne, how you doing there sweet? How's the flu, is it better?

Katie, I hope you're feeling better babes. I'm sorry I've not been online much today & last night (damm time differences!)

*cuddles Alexx and helps also to wipe off the dust from the denial tent* I think I'm decorating it so people can cleberate Christmas, but those who don't like it, can have their own space :-)Congratulations on finishing your application to UCAS woop! Time will fly by, trust me!!!!

Dayna, hope you're okay sweetie.....

Kahlia, how are you pet?

Emma, thank you for being very proud of me for trying to sort out my sleeping patterns. I'm hoping last night won't set me back. But Wednesday night's sleep was mainly good with innteruptions but they were smaller and it didn't set me back last night. I only went to bed so early last night because I was falling asleep by 9.15pm.. So tonight, I'm aiming to be attempting sleep by 12am, just to make it easier really. Then I really have to stick it. Then I've got to try carry on waking early too, which is hard still. I'm glad you went to bed last night when you did. Hope you got some okay sleep.

Hope you're doing okay ravynsoul :)

*hugs and cookies for everyone*

-----------------------------------

Today's been an interesting day really. Was woken up at 8am, eventually got out of bed before 9am. Took a while though. Me & Mum went shopping for a few things and went and got our Christmas tree. Was stuipdly amusing because we kep going around and around and around. Yet last year, because of neither of us wanting to really get a tree, we'd chosen the second tree we saw, well sorta :laugh: Whereas today we took longer. But it's all good. So popped into a couple shops before going home properly, for lunch and stuffs, even got some icecream for MEEEE fro Christmas haha!!! As I don't like any other the other frozen puddings my mum has gotten for her, and two of my sisters.

We had lunch, and then I went upstairs and had a little nap :whistling: whilst Mum sorted out the tree and stuffs. Then had an early dinner, and went over to my cousins' and saw baby Grace again. She's just so adorable. We were there for like an hour & a half. Then we eventually left and went to shop & walked Charlie and here I am writing this very long post :laugh:

Emma and Hells: Yeah, I am doing okay, thanks. I've got my mood set as 'unsafe' due to the ole mood swings. Had some rather dark lows, which comes with some really strong feelings of triggered-ness and so as a result, my SI's escalated a lot these past couple of weeks. Today, however, seems to be a break from that, but it really doesn't take much for my mood to lurch downhill, hence why I haven't changed it from 'unsafe'.

O_o Does that make sense?

Thanks guys, am feeling a bit better still have headache grrr.

Kahlia, sounded like a fun walk/jog lol! Hope your feeling better. I don't think it's a bug. Just a general headache and yeah =(

Ravyn- how are you going hun?

Mary anne- hope your feeling better, hope you had a good cry *cuddles*

Zowie- hope it will work out for you though.. 'grats on getting to one month :D

Emma- glad you went to bed, hope your feeling better, it was good you didn't carry it out *snuggles*

Dayna- makes sense =) Hope your doing ok.. and keeping safe *cuddles*

~*forever_lost*~- thank you for the tray.. yum! nom nom nom! how are you doing?

Hey helen! it's ok.. damn time differences grrr it is so annoying =( sounds like a good day =)

*Cuddles Snuffles (Katie, amirite?) back and offers painkillers* Mmm. As luck would have it, the mood's dropped again now, and I'm a little triggered. Nothing too serious though. I'm managing