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Sorry guys...i've been hiding for quite some time...
more often than not i've been sleeping oops..but yeah, i'm okies :) *hugs every1 who has entered the psych ward and brings some cake for u to munch on* Question thread chloe?? huh? Oh well...back i go to my uni work, lots of stuff to do in very little amount of time :-S |
"for fun....check to see if it's you v2"
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can i hibernate in here away from my brain???? :(
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Yeah sure, welcome hun :)
Arrrgh I'm stressing. |
*hugs you all*
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I want to cry and be all selfish and self destruct. I am actually debating whether I could cut and get to a+e and stitched whilst my nan sleeps. I am pretty sure I cant but might be worth a try? *sits and cries* My MH co-ordinator promised to email me as soon as the meeting was over and she didn't she broke it. And now stupidly, I know, I hate her, like am really stupidly upset with her. I know it is ridiculous to be so upset with someone I barely know who hasn't done anything but I cant help it. Why can't I be left alone to destruct?
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Hi.
I hate hospitals :] I hate stupid ****ing porters who think they are better than me because i ask for the MENTAL HEALTH Unit.... YES I HAVE A ****ING PROBLEM.DEAL WITH IT :] I hate stupid crisis team people who dont think theres anything wrong with me :] Maybe...I'll prove it to you and tak another OD....but this time...a bigger one...:] And then...I'll hurt myself sooooooooooo bad you'll be stitching me back together :] I hate you. You're a bitch. You know NOTHING about my life. **** off ok?:] *cries* Don't make me go back >.< Please guys....I can't *rocks* |
*hugs everyone*
Ales & Em. Please don't pushg the destruct button. I know I'm being hyprocritical because I want to do the same. But the three of us know deep down its not worth it. I wish I was better at helping people, let alone me. I'm so so so tired, physically, mentally and emotionally. I have to work tomorrow. I'm looking forward to seeing Charl, Will, Lou, Tania & Laura cus they're great. But everyone is gonna ask me what happened to my hand. I can lie I know. But what lie? I don't want to lie to such great people. But I can't say oh yeah I did it. So what. Oh well. Today's one of those days I hate working for the sodding public. I swear to gwad, at least one customer upsets me every time. If the other shift was anything to go by then I'm gonna be a wreck. Last time I had to manage the tills on my own all day nearly. The reason why we have THREE staff on the tills so that nobody if left alone. Because ONE person cannot manage to deal with customers, phone calls and stuff when they dont have much knoweldge of some things grr grr. I'm scared. I just want to die again. Great. Great. Nothing's going to get better. Things finally are starting to feel real. *hides in a corner with Alex and with Charlie & Millie.* |
*hides her face with Helen and Charlie and Millie*
*goes to be sick* I should stop drinking >< |
You should hun. Please don't drink anymore.
I really want to die. Everything feels real again. Things haven't felt real since that friday. Oh. Work tomorrow. Whatever. I'm gonna die soon. |
Then you ar the complete opposite of me hun :/
NOTHING feels real... I shouldn't be alive... but I can't die... people keep getting in the way :/ It probably sounds nice...to not feel real... but its awful :/ |
I feel that way.
I just meant the suidicial feeling finally feels real again. I dunno what to do about work :( |
To say I'm suicidal right now is an understatement.
I won't do it though, but gods is it tempting. |
i've had anough, i really cant do this anymore!!! can i just go now, no 1 will care or notice that i'm gone n e way. i'm just causing people way to much hurt and thats not fair. :crying:
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*hugs everyone*
I don't know what to say other than I know how you two are feeling. xxx |
*hugs everyone*
Good lord we're all a mess aren't we? I feel crap... And am planing on masking it with two bottles of wine and a razor blade:pinch: *continues her drinking* |
we are all a mess. *hugs*
this morning i realised that everyone is going to be able to see my latest cut. why couldn't i have realised that last night?? why? are lollipops a safe food? alexx, well done for going to the hosp. ignore the stupid porters. they don't know anything. |
F**kF**kF**kF**kF**k!!!!!
Two bottles of wine down... And I feel worse than I did when I started. *shrug* Now it's time for my razor... I'll be careful y'all, I promise... But... I WOULD like to die:crying: |
Hahahahaha my non-mother just told me she wished the lump on my neck was actually a tumor so I'd die. She's wishing "horrible" things on me right now...oh, the laughs, doesn't she know that I would love for this lump to be caner so I'd die? Doesn't she know that nothing more horrible than her abuse can happen to me because such a thing doesn't even exist? She's just so hilarously ignorant.
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Sh*t!!!!! I cut too deep and blood started spurting, like, really spurting:crying: I'm currently waiting in a room at hospital wishing for one of two things:
1) You really COULD die of embarrassment 2) Christ would come and I'd be gone so none of this would matter:crying: Good G*d, what a f**k up I am:crying: |
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