*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Mrs Pan*

*Hugs Mara*

Night My Wardies *Hugs*

*hugs oliver*
*hugs mark*
*hugs crimson*
*hugs lindsay*
*hugs ian*
*hugs pan*
*hugs mara*

Pro inpatient:
it's faster than outpatient
I can't run from my problems and myself
others with similar problems would be there = not alone

Con:
I'm really really scared
my dad doesn't know anything about anything
I couldn't run from my problems and myself
I couldn't SI
they usually don't let people restrict or purge I guess
everybody would know

*hugs Laura* I hope the talk with the inpatient lady goes ok tomorrow.

*hugs Mara* I love ballet as well, so we can be uberfreaky together and btw Nessun Dorma is a great piece of music.

*hugs Lindsay* I hope you managed to get through the night without cutting, you can be strong and beat this.

*hugs Mark* night.

*hugs Mrs Pan* I'm sorry you cut, how are you feeling now?

*hugs Ian* I'm always here if you want someone to talk to.

*hugs Oliver* it's in 2 weeks. I still have enough time to freak out about it and panick and scare myself even more. lol

*hugs Laura* ooops I thought it was tomorrow for some reason! well I hope it goes well when it comes.

*hugs Laura*

*hugs Mara*

*hugs Lindsay*

*hugs Mark* night mate

*hugs Mrs Pan*

*hugs Oliver* Thanks :)

woohoo! I have an uberfreaky buddy.

Laura: hope it goes well hun. Hopefully talking to her will put your mind at ease.

I am currently sat on my bed with one of my rat boys cuddled into me. I am constantly amazed at how much better animals can make you feel.

awww a rat. I really want to get a hamster, but scared of what my mum will say. Don't know why I am as I live on my own.

I have 14 rats lol, I adore them, they're the best pets ever - altho mine are totally mental (wonder where they got that from). Just do it! She can say what she likes but if you already have him/her nothing you can do then is there? :)

*hugs everyone*
maaaark i dislike you :P
you getta see lovely person 'fore me *sulks* :P

*hugs ward*
I have to be up in a few hours. :/

*hugs all* just letting u all know I prolly won't be around much in the next few days bc I don't have Internet access.. We had a huge storm and a bunch of ppl are without power/cable/Internet. Hopefully it'll get fixed soon.. I'll still check my PM box via phone if anyone needs anything. Stay safe!

*snuggles with felicia and kissies*
have fuuuuuuuuuuuun =]
*sulks*

[hiiii laura]

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Mara*

*Hugs Heather* I do! :P I don't disslike you though :)

*Hugs Felicia* <3

*Hugs Laura*

I feel so alone and frightened.

*Hugs Journeyofdiscovery if okay* Hi I'm Mark :)

You're not alone here, journeyofdiscovery.

Hi all.
Haven't slept all night. Want to crawl into bed now but I have stuff to do today. I just want to cancel, I know I shouldn't, I don't know what to do.

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Mrs Pan*

*hugs Mark*

Just want to give up, to be honest.

*hugs journeyofdiscovery*
*hugs Mark*
*hugs Laura* I hope they fix your internet soon. It's boring without internet
*hugs Lindsay*
*hugs Pan*
*hugs Heather*

*hugs everyone* Hope you're all ok today?

*Hugs Mrs Pan*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Mara*

*hugs Mara*
*hugs Mark*

how are you?

*hugs everyone*

I'm still feeling a deep desire to kill myself but it doesn't seem so urgent now. I can at least wait until I see my psychologist on Thursday. He seems to care although there is nothing that he can do to help me.

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Night hugs my wardies*

night Mark

Goodnight Mark.

How are you, Laura?

feels like I'm in hell.
I injured, purged and now I'm crying.

how are you?

*Hides* feel unwanted

*Hugs Laura* I'm so sorry that your struggling so much. *Sits with you*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Mara*

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Laura*

Hi.I'm Anna. I just want to pull up a duvet a lay under it. Hospital is a place where I don't have to b scared to admit that I'm hurting,it's expected I don't have to pretend I can fall apart. (I haven't self harmed in two years and I'm not going to i have much at stake)

...
 

Hi.I'm Anna. I just want to pull up a duvet a lay under it. Hospital is a place where I don't have to b scared to admit that I'm hurting,it's expected I don't have to pretend I can fall apart. (I haven't self harmed in two years and I'm not going to i have much at stake) I just want to sleep untill this all goes away.

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Anna*

I woke up today to no message from Felicia , I know contact will be sporadic and she is in all likelyhood in the UK now. I Just miss her so much.. I could cry...

OH Felicia Messaged me ! She is in London! :)

*hugs Anna*

Yay, Mark!

I want to die so much. I'm starting my voluntary work on Monday and it's going to be so hard to put on a face.

*Hugs Lindsay* What are you volunteering as? I know how hard it is to put that face on *Extra Squish*

Hey fellow patients, how we doing today? I walked some dogs for the Bristol dogs home today & I'm shattered & in pain. Feel better for it though. *yawn* Hope everyone is ok *leaves cookies*

*Hugs Mara* Ooooooooooooh! Cookies :) Thankee

I'm volunteering in a women's library, not sure what i'm going to be doing. The people seem really nice but it is so exhausting to act like i'm ok.

How are you, Mark?

Good for you, Mara!

*Hugs Lindsay*

*curls up*

What's wrong, Oliver?

want to OD really badly, but planned it for tomorrow, but cant wait.
read a friends blog and got really jealous cos he is already on testosterone even though he came out after me and he has his second appt at the gender clinic before me, even though i had my first appt first and he is being referred for chest surgery. sorry

*Huggles All*
*cuddles Oliver*

*Hugs Crimson*

*hugs Mark and Crimson*

Oliver, I know that feeling really well but overdosing isn't worth it in the end. What do you want from overdosing?

I want to feel some physical illness instead of this mental pain, because physical illness I can deal with and I can get help for it, but feeling mental pain is too hard and I can't cope with it, I need a break.

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Oliver*