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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 08:08 PM

Something big and scary. Something that wants me to see it. It's going to make me see it.

I'm sorry you feel no better April. I felt like that once. A friend told my English teacher about my harming, and in my English lesson that afternoon, I felt as if I were sat there naked. It was horrible, but the feeling does pass. I was comfortable with her in a few weeks. *Hugs*


Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 08:16 PM

I don't want to have to wait ****ing weeks to feel comfortable with my parents again. They only live 20 miles away and I am used to talking with them pretty frequently and seeing them frequently as well. I'm sorry, I know it sounds like I'm also having a go but I'm... well, yeah. Not in a good place right now. Thanks for the reassurance, Lia. That had to have been an awful experience as this one is... :(

I just want things to go back to how they were. I don't give a damn about change. I just... want them to go back. Where they - none of my family - knew about the SA.

*hides in the warren where no one can find her and cries*

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 08:21 PM


Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 08:30 PM

Aw Lia, I wasn't expressing anger at you. I'm sorry. The tone of my post was all wrong. Nothing you said was wrong. It's just that I am dealing with a mountain of stress at the moment and I guess I really have to be careful what I say. Or at least, how I say it. *tentative hugs?* I apologize for seeming like I was having a go at you or disregarding the feelings of the person behind your post, because you DO matter, don't let that make it feel like you don't. I'm sorry. :(

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 08:35 PM

It's alright, just me taking things in the wrong way again. I do that a lot. *Hugs back*


RYUU 29-08-2010 08:41 PM

i feel a little bit safer now but i still think am going to do something dangerous trying to keep busy

Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 08:46 PM

*huggles Lia* How're you doing now? & what makes you feel/think there's something in your closet? (wish I could be there to check for you) I have had those fears before... even had my mum come and check for me, hah. But it (whatever closet/cubby it happens to be) is empty of everything but my own stuff 99% of the time and the other 1% of the time it's a mouse or something kicking up a racket. *extra comforting hugs*

Go go Reaper, with the distractions!! :) What are you staying busy doing? (if you don't mind me asking) Please keep distracting yourself because I/we really don't want you to do anything dangerous... I'm worried about you, love. Stay as safe as you possibly can. *gentle hugs*

RYUU 29-08-2010 08:49 PM

busy being on forums and watching my husband playing games talking with his friends online
looking stuff up on testosterone and listening to the radio

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 08:51 PM

Haha. I don't mean that kinda closet. Although there's probably something in there too. I don't even wanna know what's in my real closet, but anyway. I was on about the skelingtons in my 'closet' if that makes any sense at all.
*Returns comforting hugs and hands tissues.*


Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 08:54 PM

Oh whoops, lol, my bad. Gotta admit that's one of the funnier mistakes/interpretations. :P Yeah, I understand what you mean about the "skeletons in your closet" thing. I get that too sometimes. :( It can be scary. If you want to talk more about it, I'm here to listen - real closet or skeletons closet. ;) *cuddles*

Reaper, those sound like good ways to distract yourself. :) Way to go!!

Doikers 29-08-2010 09:07 PM

*Hugs Reaper , Lia , April*

Sorry I've not really been in a position to post much , am watching a movie with my parents . Just to let you know I am trying to keep up and reading the posts .:)

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 09:14 PM

Thanks April. I was gonna call you Lia just then- then I remembered that was my name. Wow, we're a clever pair.

Pain pain go away, come again another day. Then again, maybe don't. Please just go now. That hurts to much. I can't deal. Go away before I do. We can't both live in this body together. Go...please...

Wow, now I'm talking to my emotions. I have truly cracked.

one_step_closer 29-08-2010 09:30 PM

*hugs everyone*

I just spoke to someone from the crisis team for over half an hour. I think i'll be safe for tonight because it passed the time and now i'm almost ready to go to sleep but I don't think i'll be safe tomorrow. My support worker is calling me in the morning and then i'm going to the gym with her in the afternoon but if i'm still feeling like overdosing i'll do it in the evening.

Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 09:33 PM

Hi Mark. *cuddles* Glad that you're managing to keep up, also glad that you're distracted (are you??) at your parents'. Hopefully you can stop yourself from SI'ing at all when you're there although please don't beat up yourself if you can't. Post when you can, we're here for you. :)

Lia, lol, that made me giggle. Yes, we are a clever pair indeed. ;) I have to admit I've never quite pulled that one - I mean, calling someone else by my name - but I have talked to my emotions before. Doesn't mean you've cracked or are crazy. Just means that you're expressing how you feel. It doesn't really matter how (as long as it's not in a destructive way, although I understand where that comes from too), as long as you manage to do it. Because - as many of us have found - holding emotions in is NOT healthy. :( *cuddles*

Hels, how are you doing now?? *cuddles*

Lindsay, how are you? still managing to fight off the OD urges?? I really hope so... *cuddles*

Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 09:35 PM

Whoops, we posted at the same time. :P I'm glad that you're gonna be okay for today... worry about today, today, and tomorrow when it comes. Please try & keep fighting the urges. You deserve health and safety and happiness. Please take care of yourself the best you can and if you can't, phone the crisis team just like you did. (Well done, btw!!)


Doikers 29-08-2010 09:38 PM

*Hugs Lia* Talking to your emotions doesn't make you crazy , hmmm I talk to myself all the time and a lot of it I don't even make sense :P

*Hugs April* I haven't harmed today but it's (to use your expresion) driving me bats !

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Reaper*

Scarletdreamer 29-08-2010 09:39 PM

Yey for not harming today, but no yey for it driving you bats. :( But at least you've been safe. :) That's a plus!! ^_^ I'm happy about that now... hehe.

My stomach hurts. I ate too much for lunch. Stupid'ness. :'(

FlyingNy 29-08-2010 09:45 PM

You're not stupid April. How are you feeling now? I know. That holding in emotions isn't healthy that is, but I can't help it. I have to protect myself. It's explained on my R/V thread. First post. I've been too hurt.

Well done on not harming today Mark, we're proud of you :)

Linday- I'm glad you're safe for now. Please do try and stay that way.

I'm tempted to cut. That will make it the second day in a row.


Doikers 29-08-2010 09:48 PM

Thankyou Lia , That means a lot :)

taz35 29-08-2010 09:53 PM

*hugs Hels, April, Mark, Felicia, Lindsay, Reaper, Lia, and anybody else*

Just got back from work, urgh. Brother is having a ton of friends over tonight for beer pong. Most of them are alright, but the last thing I want is people over... hopefully I can hide in my room in the basement and not be bothered.

I SI'ed earlier today which I'm kinda bummed about... because it was just out of frustration at the new meds, and how my brain still can't comprehend that they don't mean I'm psychotic... this probably doesn't make any sense so I'll stop rambling now.

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