RYL Forums - Virtual Psych ward!

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- - Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

*hugs Louise* how are you?
*hugs MessedUp* you want to talk about it? what's going on for you?

*Hugs Messedup if okay*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Louise*

*hugs everyone*

I'm tired of barely getting through each day. I have to die.

*Hugs Lindsey* I don't know what tell you other than myself, and everyone else in this ward would never want that.

*hugs all*

Lindsay I don't want you to die, nor does anyone in the ward *extra hugs*

*hides* too stressed

*Hugs Lindsay* You don't need to die hun , You are important to me , I would miss you :/

*Hugs Lia* How are you ?

*Hugs Oliver* How are you doing?

*Hugs Oliver and Mark*

What's up Oliver?

Hey Mark, I don't know. I want to be happy and have been happyish for the past few months, but there are...things. I just thought I'd come and say hi. How are you?

hugs lia, mark, oliver and lindsay

*Squishes Lia* I'm on PM here or on FB if you need hun :)

*Hugs Louise*

Thanks Mark :) I was in Wales the other day and thought of you. I was visiting a uni, Bangor, it looks like Hogwarts and has a tea society and does an English with creative writing course. It's a really nice place as well, it's a city technically but it's one of those cities that's really a town with a cathederal. I don't know if you've been there, but I certainly liked it. Anyway.

I'm thinking about coming back. I'm on a trial thing right now, I will make my decision in the next few days.

*Hugs Louise* How are you dear?

*hugs Lindsay* I would miss you.
*hugs Lia*
*hugs Oliver*
*hugs Mark*
*hugs all*

*Hugs Lia*

*HUGS louise*

Hey Laura, how are you?

*hugs Mark* how are you?
*hugs Lia*

went to a spacialist today. i was there for 1hour and 30min, it was exhausting.
She gave me 2 questionairs to fill in, there were some really funny questions.

i hate mrs dalloway >.> hafta write paper on... but scenes in=argh =s

*hugs Lia, Mark, Heather, Laura, Louise, Lindsay*

Hey Heather. Everything all right?

*Hugs Oliver* Are you feeling any calmer?

*hugs Lia* how are you?

I'm still pretty stressed still, but trying not to think about it too much

Okay Oliver, but I'm here if you need me.

I'm all right, considering coming back. I don't know, I was happyish and I still have some of that, but I miss you guys and think a stint here may help.

*Hugs Katiee*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Mark*

*Hugs Lindsay*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Lia*

*Hugs Louise*

*hugs Mark, Lia, Ian, Heather, Laura, Oliver, Louise, Lindsay, and everyone else*

*waves to all the new people* hi! i'm Laura!

I've been okay. Been going around and visiting people from uni.. trying to make my break before graduate school go by faster I guess.

I keep wanting to come on here and post, but something keeps stopping me... not sure what it is exactly. Don't feel like I completely belong anymore I guess (and it's not anyone's fault... I'm not complaining at all.. you guys are all fantastic. It's more a "me" thing then anything else... I'm a lot different from when I first posted here back in '09 heh... that's just how things go I guess). But yeah, that's mainly why I've just been lurking and reading.

Anyway, I hope everyone is staying safe. Oh and I made a blueberry lemon cake the other day. It was so good! *passes out non-calorie pieces to the ward*

*Hugs Lia*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Heather*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Laura* Cake for breakfast! Yum :)

I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to kill myself. I'm sorry but I just can't do this any more.

Lindsay please get help .
Am sorry that things are so hard for you right now
please get some help call a crisis line or go to A and E

*big hugs* to those I know and *waves* to those wardies who have come onboard since I have last been on here.

Sorry I haven't been posting but there has been so much negative stuff going on that I'm barely managing to hold myself together. I'm extremely exhausted, depressed, suicidal, sleep deprived and bordering on psychotic but hey, that's life. And my GP decided to leave me for four days without a medication that you cannot stop abruptly for my physical pain.

Anyway any more information is available on the last page of my thread if anyone is interested. Take care all.

*huggles Lindsay* how are you now?
*hugs Angel21*
*cuddles Kahlia*

I cut again ...cant seem to stop doing it ...maybe if i talk to my Dr about it
but she really dosent seem bothered about it really because it never anything major

*Hugs Lindsay* PLEASE reach out , Even if it's just to me. I will try and help. *Squishes*

*Hugs Kahlia*

*Waves to Angel* You can beat this hun :)

*Hugs Laura*

*walks in and leaves hugs in jars on the table*
*goes into padded room and locks self in*
*falls apart*

*holds out super glue for everybody to put themselves back together*
*lays in grass*

*hugs everyone*

I can't take any more emotional pain. I HAVE to get my brother to understand this and kill myself.

*Hugs Crimson*

*Hugs Mrs Pan*

*Hugs Lindsay*

Hey guys.

*Hugs Crimson* Do you want to talk about it?

*Hugs Mark* How are you today?

*Hugs Lindsey extra hard* I don't know what to say. Are you receiving any treatment for MH right now? If you're not, I don't know how you would go about getting some but go to your GP or someone, please, anyone.

*hugs mark*
*double hugs lindsay*
*hugs pan*
*hugs crimson*
*hugs lia*
*hugs angel21*

*Hugs Laura* Hey, how are you doing?

Hi. I feel a bit rubbish. How are you all?

Nice entrance that methinks lol.

*hugs Lia* how are you?
*hugs Pan*

I was detached for the last week or so and now I'm not detached anymore. I think I like feeling detached better.

That makes sense. I like being numb better than feeling stuff most of the time.

*Night time hugs y'all

especially cause my sister and mom both found out about the cutting on wednesday last week and I had an appointment with a specialist yesterday. She suggested that I go inpatient for 6 weeks. My mom likes the idea. I dislike the idea. I don't want to ****ing feel now.

*good night hugs mark*

Night night Mark.

*Hugs Pan* Is that okay?

I hate it when people do that Laura. Try and tell me what's best for me. Like when my head of year told my mum about my cutting, I swore it was a one off and she asked me to make a better job of it next time so she had one less mouth to feed (my mum not my HOY). I insisted it wasn't a good idea to tell her and she wouldn't listen. I'm sorry your family are being that way. Why is it you don't want to go inpatient?

*hugs Mrs. Pan, Mark, Lia, Laura, Lindsay*

Lia, I wouldn't even know what to say. Aside from feeling like I can't even hold it together I don't even know how I feel right now. Numbing out compared to earlier tho. Trying really hard not to injure.
I do know what caused it though and I hate that it is eating away at me and causing more problems than it's worth.

The following content has been hidden - Reason : the straw that broke the camel's back

Apparently D's friend (and father to my kid's friend) 'just doesn't talk to me because when he does I'm a bitch about it' Yeah well I'm sorry I don't like repeating myself, I'm sorry I don't like being lied to, I'm sorry if you don't think my feelings are valid and I'm sorry I call bullshit when necessary and think you are an arrogant ignorant ass when you tell me I'm wrong when I know I'm right

The following content has been hidden - Reason : related but sidetracked stories on that

Well the more D hangs out with him the more he acts like him in some manners... B is always asking his wife what's wrong if she isn't all smiley and when she says nothing or that she's fine he starts... throwing a tantrum is what it looks like... saying if nothing was wrong she wouldn't be acting like that (seriously half the time he starts this she's just sitting there) and after a few rounds of this she does start to get pissed off. I would too. well yesterday D was telling B how the morning got all ****ed up and how I was just in a foul mood all day because of it and when I said I wasn't in a foul mood he started in on me... Well at one point I said okay fine if I'm in the kitchen because I'm in a foul mood I guess that means I'm not making this food for our dinner I guess I'll turn it off then so I can go sit with you while you tell me all about my foul mood. That wasn't appreciated either.
And all in all things just haven't been peachy since...

I want to injure but my options there are fairly limited and I don't see them as options but I also feel the need for them... I am all kinds of conflicted on the issue. Ok so I think that does count as talking about it after all. It leaves a lot out but gets the general idea out there.

*hugs Lia and Crimson*

they all think it's best for me. T said that it would be good to go inpatient before I start uni. My mom thinks that I should go inpatient, because she watched some report about a girl who SHs on TV and she was in and out of hosp for years. She cares about me and she does understand that hosp wont work if I don't want it. I think my mom is really cool with everything, she didn't yell or go through my things. She just cried.

I'm sorry that your mom said something like that to you.

I want to move... You guys are all so far away. I think we should have RYL Island made for us...

*hugs you all lots*

*waves to anyone who doesnt want hugs*

sorry I'm not doing individual replies, I'm a bit all over the place, I'm really low and want to OD badly, but can't cos I'm going home this weekend to see my sisters ballet show and found out something bad this morning.

*hugs all*
Hugs are good for me Lia. I like your Glee avatar too :)

Well done for holding on Oliver.

Yay, an island! Better than a ward lol

*hugs Mrs Pan* how are you?

*hugs Oliver*
I'm okay at the moment, thank you for asking. Had a strange night though, emotions up and down. I will hopefully get to sleep as soon as I go to bed so I don't have time to think about rubbish stuff.