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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

ˈsäləˌterē 18-04-2011 06:11 AM

I'm sorry Megz! Didn't mean to leave ya hangin. Another friend needed my help. I know you haven't been here. I missed you!

And I'm so glad you are Felicia! I wish you were better than just alive.

Kahlia1981 18-04-2011 06:26 AM

*hugs all*

Going downhill emotionally. Have had to severely reduce my meds that I can't afford ... down to nothing now as I've run out. Last night for the first time since I've been home - the first time since I left for Cairns probably - making a suicide plan. I'm becoming lost in all the bs that's been happening lately with life just seeming to be getting worse and worse. I just don't know what to do at the moment. I tried to tell my fiancee but just couldn't bring myself to do it. He does know that there is depression prevalent at the moment, but I couldn't tell him that last little detail. I really wish we could turn a corner in every way possible. *sigh*

Sorry for clogging the thread with my crap.

Doikers 18-04-2011 10:34 AM

*Hugs Solo*

*Hugs libz*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Megz*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Ileana*

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Kahlia* It's NOT crap hun ,we care about you :)

Doikers 18-04-2011 11:23 AM

I realise I have no real problems , Then Why the hell Can't I shift this flat mood , right now I'm nervous about opening up to my social worker in case she wants to hospitalise me but scared that if I hold back I'll not get any help. I'm a total idiot , I've even started planning my funeral, I have the songs down , I'm getting suicidal fantasys and right at this minute I am sad enough to cry but I'll try not to with my Social workers impending arrival. I don't even know whay I'm sad...........Sorry

Doikers 18-04-2011 11:45 AM

Well My Social Worker didn't show up yet so I called the Mental health Resource Centre and they told me she is on study leave today FFS! I am so pissed off right now I need to walk and have my headphones in and get some food but mainly walk with music..........I am already on the verge of tears I really needed to speak with her:(

Louise 18-04-2011 12:23 PM

could they not have let you know before now that your social worker was away and would not be.

Doikers 18-04-2011 12:46 PM

You'd think it would be common courtesy woulden't you Louise?
*Hugs* How are you?

Mors Certa 18-04-2011 01:00 PM

Sorry to hear that you all are having a rough go of it, wish I could offer some help or advise. Can barely hold myself together, can't seem to formulate any helpful words. Very hard to see through the dark

Doikers 18-04-2011 01:28 PM

*Hugs Mors Certa* I'm sorry you are struggling man :(

Laura2.0 18-04-2011 01:46 PM

*hugs solo*
*hugs Mark*
*hugs Mors Certa*
*hugs kahlia*
*hugs louise*
*hugs felicia*
*hugs megz*
*hugs all in case I forgot anyone*

do you think I'll get a day off to go to the funeral? I don't want to go, but she doesn't have a lot of relatives and it would be odd if there were just 5 or 6 people at the funeral, so I should come. right? and for my grandparents, too. they would be the only ones besides my mom and my siblings.

I'm sorry if I'm not around much this week. I have to take care of the horse, go to the funeral and plan the weekend trip in addition to work.

Doikers 18-04-2011 01:53 PM

*Hugs Laura*

Laura2.0 18-04-2011 02:26 PM

*hugs mark*

Doikers 18-04-2011 03:16 PM

I'm really really unhappy . . . . . . . *Sigh*

ˈsäləˌterē 18-04-2011 03:51 PM

Thanks for the hugs Mark n Laura! ~Hugs ya back~

SoMuchMore 18-04-2011 06:49 PM

*hugs everyone and curls up in the corner*

PoisonedApple 18-04-2011 06:51 PM

*hugs Laura, Mark and Solo*

Doikers 18-04-2011 06:59 PM

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Crimson* Thanks for your advice hun I got your PM's I'll certainly consider your advice hun :)

Laura2.0 18-04-2011 06:59 PM

*hugs mark, solo, fallingstar laura and poisoned apple*

PoisonedApple 18-04-2011 07:13 PM

*hugs Mark* You're welcome :) If I think of anything else I'll PM it to you.
*hugs Mute.Scream*

Doikers 18-04-2011 07:25 PM

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Crimson*

I ask My Best Friend out for a drink in a pub as opposed to our usual coffee and she said yes . It's not a "Date" but I do Love her so much.
Feelings . Are . Confusing.

Laura2.0 18-04-2011 07:58 PM

*hugs mark* yeah.. feelings can be confusing.
*hugs crimson*

funeral is going to be wednesday morning. I can only go if I get the day off work. Is a funeral even a reason to ask for a day off??

Mors Certa 18-04-2011 08:11 PM

Waiting on doc have been here an hour already, thinking about leaving

Doikers 18-04-2011 08:18 PM

Laura , a Family Funeral is a totally valid reason to ask for the day off. *Hugs*

*Hugs Mors Certa* Please stay safe mate, I'm about if not always paying attention.

frenchhorn 18-04-2011 09:46 PM

*jump in the ward and hugs everyone*

I've missed you all, sorry I've not been about my computer got infected by a nasty virus thing and I've only just fixed it.
how be you all?

PoisonedApple 18-04-2011 09:51 PM

*hugs Oliver* I'm doing okay. I went holiday basket shopping yesterday... That always makes me feel like a giddy little kid lol.
Aside from the comp issue, how're you doing?

Doikers 18-04-2011 09:52 PM

Stupid , I'm an idiot and about to phjone my social worker , FFS she should have let me know she was on study leave , I feel so stupid , ****! I could just..................do something irrevervsable

frenchhorn 18-04-2011 09:53 PM

I've been up and down, more down, but lots of horrid mood swings

frenchhorn 18-04-2011 09:53 PM

*hugs Mark* please dont do some you cant undo,please don't.

Doikers 18-04-2011 09:56 PM

/Well iv'e left my social worker a message saying "the classy thung to do would to be let me know she was on study leave" but I won't injre I won't at least badly

frenchhorn 18-04-2011 10:00 PM

*hugs Mark*

PoisonedApple 18-04-2011 10:00 PM

*sits with Mark and holds his hands until bed time*
*hugs*
Your SW isn't worth doing that to yourself, hun. You are worth more than that.

*hugs Oliver* Sorry to hear you've been more down than up. Anything your doc can do to help the mood swings any?

Louise 18-04-2011 10:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doikers (Post 2774088)
You'd think it would be common courtesy woulden't you Louise?
*Hugs* How are you?

you would it is not fair on you especially when you had it planned and also the fact you could have planned something else if you new. if that makes sense?

~hugs everyone~

I am tired

Doikers 18-04-2011 10:10 PM

*hugs my wardies nihtnight* I love you guys and gals.

frenchhorn 18-04-2011 10:25 PM

night night Mark *hugs*

*hugs Louise and Crimson* my psych is thinking of putting me on Lithium to help with the mood swings, but that wont be until July

Louise 18-04-2011 10:44 PM

how do you feel about that Oliver?

Night mark

Cazki 18-04-2011 10:57 PM

I feel left out :( *sits in the corner alone*

*Hugs Mark*

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Laura*

*Hugs Solo*

*Hugs Oliver*

*Hugs Felicia*

*Hugs Jeff*

*Hugs Crimson*

*Hugs Ileana*

*Hugs Megz*

*Hugs Libz*

PoisonedApple 18-04-2011 11:05 PM

*hugs Mark good night*
*hugs Ian* no need to feel left out :)
*hugs Louise and Oliver*

shadow13 19-04-2011 02:03 AM

I got called a fag. By one of my childhood friends. He said he liked me and I told him I was gay (lesbian) and he started being really negative about it, telling me that it wasn't normal. There's nothing wrong with me, right?

I just feel so upset, I'm an open gay and I haven't been called a fag yet. FFS I'm only 15. It hurts so much! Does it ever get better? Are there lots of people like that out there?

note: Sorry I haven't told any of you that I'm a lesbian, I hope it doesn't change anything between us. You guys have been my tower of strenght for so long... :'(

Mors Certa 19-04-2011 03:30 AM

So... I had appointment with therapist today. Did not go well, I just completely fell apart (something I have been doing alot of lately) my meds are completely screwed up, life sucks, but I usually handle things better than this, therapist is concerned that I may need to go inpatient for a while to get the meds under control. I can't take inpatient again, I still have horrific flashbacks from my last stint inside. Perhaps I could just hide in here for a while?

BWchick 19-04-2011 04:40 AM

*Huggles* of course! I'm Meganna! call me whatever! Ugh I totally understand the med situation :P no fun. *pulls out chocolate* would you like some?

Ileana 19-04-2011 07:21 AM

*waves and then hugs everyone* Popping up here...I come and go, or maybe I just go hide in a closet and pretend I left and when nobody's looking I run out of the closet and outside and then slowly, nonchalantly, walk back inside with news from the outside world that I just made up in my head. Hey, it's almost 3 am and I haven't slept so...if I sound manic that's probably it.

Ileana 19-04-2011 07:23 AM

Does anybody want an Easter egg? I have many, of different colors *hands out Easter eggs filled with wonder and happiness*

I opened one earlier today and a little bunny rabbit hopped out so be careful.

Doikers 19-04-2011 10:53 AM

*Hugs oliver* I'm on Lithium so any questions.......ask.

*Hugs Louise*

*Hugs Ian*

*Hugs Crimson*

*Hugs Shad* Nothing is wrong with you hun :)

*Hugs Mors Certa*

*Hugs Megz*

*Hugs Ileana*

Louise 19-04-2011 12:27 PM

hugs everyone

Doikers 19-04-2011 01:03 PM

*Squishes Louise*

*Spots and Squishes Kahlia*

Kahlia1981 19-04-2011 01:16 PM

Mark: Thanks big brother. I needed that *hugs back*

*hugs everyone*

This depressive mood is starting to really affect my day to day life. I'm struggling with decision making and finding motivation to do anything - including eat, sleep, get out of bed (daytime), having a shower etc. Everything has become so much harder and I don't quite know what to do.

Right now I'm hanging on to the oldest truth that I can: It can't rain all the time. I just wish that it would stop pouring and give us even the tiniest bit of sunlight. *sigh*

Sorry that I'm not able to be supportive for everyone at the moment. I'm struggling to keep up with the conversations in here and feel bad about not being able to and am chastising myself for not posting individuals or providing more support. So I'm really sorry.

I think I would like to disappear ...

Doikers 19-04-2011 01:23 PM

Don't be sorry Kahlia <3 Please take good care of yourself, and Have Your Boy look after you too. I'm also pretty depressed , what you said about your depression is freakishly similar to how I feel *Hugs*

ˈsäləˌterē 19-04-2011 01:43 PM

~Hugs for everyone~ Especially Ian!
Of course it doesn't change anything Shad! We love just the same!
I'd love some chocolate Megz!
Ooh, can I have an easter egg too Ileana?
I love the rest of you too! That's just all I can manage right now.

shadow13 19-04-2011 01:50 PM

thanks for your support guys! I love you all! <3

Laura2.0 19-04-2011 02:25 PM

*hugs shade* nothing is wrong with you. For me it doesn't matter if ppl are gay or straight or both.

*hugs Mors Certa* sorry your meds are messed up, hopefully you wont have to go inpatient.

*hugs Meganna*
*hugs Ileana* thankies for the easter eggs
*hugs Louise*
*hugs kahlia* it's ok that you aren't doing individual replies. I hope the sun comes out soon.
*hugs Ian* how can you be ian if your username is Atlantica? you used to be Monsoon, right? you are confusing me a bit.. sorry if it's rude to ask.
*hugs everyone* in case I forgot someone.

I'm off work tomorrow, because of the funeral.


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