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-   -   Virtual Psych ward! (https://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1312)

MammaMia 08-06-2010 04:07 PM

My anemia is playing me up rotten today, don't know what to do :'( Can't take my iron pills as won't be ready til Friday. ****ing bollocks =[

Doikers 08-06-2010 04:28 PM

I ran into a Nurse from the pysch ward 2nd day in a row in Morrisons , just freaked out , left my shopping came really fast back to my flat and took a Diaz , which I hope kicks in soon, I'm STILL really low and the woman who does the accupunctre nocticed and took me to one side and asked if I was ok which nice., But meeting the nurse has bought back thoughts of being in hospital , I SO Want to cut , I shouldn't but I NEED to , going to lay down till Diaz works

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 04:53 PM

Just don't know what to do with my emotions... Inside, I'm all over the place and I just feel numb and stuff.
My urges are coming back, really strong as well.

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 04:57 PM


i feel like crap... thus the lowercase letters. that's usually what it means.
i do the same thing... took me a while to notice i did it though. a few times i went back through and edited to fix it but now i don't bother...

sorry fallen kite. (sorry don't know your name) the simple plan post was me. *waves welcome*

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 04:58 PM

*cuddles everyone needing one*

*curls up in a ball and hides*

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 05:19 PM

*cuddles Crimson* What's up, sweet?

*cuddles Hels* I'm sorry about the anemia... it's odd that you can't just get iron pills from the store, over the counter, because you can here. Bummer I can't teleport you some!! Maybe eat some red meat or leafy green vegetables in the meantime? to help raise your iron levels?

*cuddles Kathryn* I'm sorry that your emotions are so frustrating. :( Sorry, don't remember exactly what you said, brain's a sieve I swear!! :( I hope that you are doing kind of okay now...

*cuddles Mark* I would be freaked out seeing nurses etc. from hospital too... especially for the second day in a row!! Are you feeling at all better? I hope so... :( I hope the diazepam helped a bit... do you feel paranoid at all? And next time your SW comes, PLEASE tell him how poorly you've been doing, even if it means having to ask to have a private moment with him instead of having that med student with him. Please try, at least? *extra-special encouraging cuddles*

*cuddles Jill* I'm sorry that you're feeling so crappy... hopefully as the day goes along you'll feel a bit better... do you know what's making you feel the way that you are?

*cuddles Nicole* I'm sorry that your mum and sister aren't getting on with you... once again, don't recall exactly what you said, but hopefully things look up soon. :( I wish I could help somehow... but please try and take care of yourself. You're important to us... and we care about you.

I think that was everyone who posted since I last did, and if not, I apologize, as I said, brain's a sieve and I'm really anxious so I think I did okay!! :P *cuddles everyone else who wants cuddles*

My meeting with my faculty supervisor and site supervisor went well although I was so effing anxious the entire time. :( I was SI'ing like crazy... found a "new way" that isn't too noticeable. Not gonna say what on here though, but it helped... didn't leave any marks but helped. :-/ I feel like a failure for resorting to SI though... anyway, can it be called self injury if it doesn't leave marks?

I have a NP appt this evening... SO anxious about that, don't want to go. She knows that I've been cutting (but doesn't know that I cut this morning... :-S neither does Jarrod) and I told her that I'm passively suicidal again... I'm really worried, I know I won't go into hospital but I CAN'T STOP WORRYING!!! :'(

Okay, back to stapling Parent Resource Guides... must get a lot done... must look useful!! :(

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 05:25 PM

Don't worry, my brain's a sieve too (:
I just have no idea what I'm feeling... As my friend says, its like I'm living in a daydream... Which I am, actually.
I'm alright, just a lot of internal conflict that I'm trying not to show externally.
Hope you're okay too (:

MammaMia 08-06-2010 05:27 PM

Why do I have to have these thoughts when I feel okay? Well apart from the stress, worry, migraine & anaemia (Y)

*hides and pretends they don't exist*

SoMuchMore 08-06-2010 05:34 PM

*cuddles and hides with helen*

I'mJustMe 08-06-2010 05:49 PM

*Takes hug. Gives her own to anyone who wants them.*

Sure, you can call me Lia. I don't mind. Today I am feeling...I don't really know. I don't know a lot. Nothing really. Just scared as usual. So scared.

I think I am going to go and to some writing.

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 05:51 PM

not much new april just sick of it all. oh and the 'perk' that david doesn't connect the dots of what he's picked up on or what he's said. *rolls eyes* i dunno... i prefer him not knowing how bad i've been feeling when i am but his theories and statements don't help either...
The following content has been hidden - Reason : examples
"you aren't that fat." "i was talking to some friends and we've established that you must be cheating on me... you don't want it here so you must be getting it from somewhere else" "oh are you not eating tonight?" there's more but i'll not drag on...

i'll stop whining about it. it's not worth whining about.

MammaMia 08-06-2010 06:28 PM

*cuddles Laura tight* Will reply to your pm in a bit sweetie, love you xx

xxjuliexx 08-06-2010 06:55 PM

*yawns* morning

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 06:56 PM

g'morning julie

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 06:59 PM

grr who wants to make 220 dollars fall off a tree? :P pref before june 30 lol

CrazyHayley 08-06-2010 07:00 PM

*dives in through an open window*

Haha! They thought they could keep me from you by sorting out my mood disorder, but they were wrong, nothing keeps me from my wardies!!! Been thinking of you all and you've all been in my healing prayers. I wish that there was more that I could do for you all, but at least its something....right?!

I've ordered myself some pizza as I think I'm going to have a night on WoW. So I'll share the pizza with you guys, though its without cheese to be vegan, lol, but obv in the ward it'll be calorie free and you can add what you want!

I did a bit too much yesterday and as a result fell asleep on the sofa even with huge amounts of caffiene in my system....Reggie was out....when I woke up, he'd chewed through my yoga mat that was blocking some wires and chewed through the wire to the wii sensor bar!! Not good!! Naughty Reggie, but he's still sooo cute.

*goes around ward giving appropriate tlc and care etc to all her fellow wardies*

For those who want to join in......"GROUP HUGGLE!!!!" .....

*settles down in the corner to play WoW and wait for pizza*

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 07:06 PM

oh animals lol. how're u

Doikers 08-06-2010 07:09 PM

*Hayley HUGE HUGS* I knew they coulden't keep you away from the ward :) I'm going to try and get a REALLY early night 7.08pm take anyone as early , I feel **** but If I don't sleep I'll pop by later . If I don't just get "out of it" eg sleep I could well do something stupider , like more cutting ,

Haylay soon we will have to play WoW together for a bit if you like , I'm almost level 18 :)

frenchhorn 08-06-2010 07:13 PM


Originally Posted by CrazyHayley (Post 2341504)
Been thinking of you all and you've all been in my healing prayers. I wish that there was more that I could do for you all, but at least its something....right?!

Please respect my wishes that I don't want to be in anyones prayers, I have already said this, don't worry you may have missed when I did.

*joins in group huggles* Enjoy the pizza and WoW Hayley

*hugs Mark* I used to freak out when saw old counsellors who I hadnt liked, its understandable, I hope you've managed to calm down a bit now.

*hugs April* I'm glad your meeting went well, I hope the appt with your NP goes/went ok

*hugs Heather, Julie, JK, Laura, Nicole, Helen, Lia, Kat, Crimson, Jill and anyone else he has forgotten-really sorry*

I opened up in counselling today, ok after a didgy start of not speaking, my counsellor asked what I wanted help with and I said about moving on from the past and he asked me to talk him through an experience from it, so I did, it was really hard and for next week I have to write a letter to the bullies from school to write down how it made me feel.
I'm off to my youth group in a min. so best dash

I'mJustMe 08-06-2010 07:55 PM

*Joins group hug*
Not even in the mood for writing anymore, now that IS weird.

How's things?

katnovia 08-06-2010 08:39 PM

he's a stupid idiot. fancy letting the little ones talk to him and be out around him when hes not even ****ing awake enough to ****ing take any notice of them. Stupid ****ing idiot. How ****ing dangerous is that? he doesn't even know lotty and what she could be like. I dont give a **** that he was dreaming and got confused. he had a CHILD there and he ****ing told her to stay away from the building and the fire! what the **** is the poor girl going to do other than run?! IDIOT. we cant stay here. its not ****ing safe. and we cant go anywhere else. Now amy is stupidly suicidal because she couldnt cope before this and now lotty is in there somewhere shaking and sobbing her eyes out because shes terrified. she went outside and that terrified her more and then he had the stupidity to get ****ing angry at the poor thing.

shouldnt rant. ****ing mad.

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 08:48 PM

Hey what's happened Sarah?

I'm Sapphire by the way

katnovia 08-06-2010 08:55 PM

lotty came out to kats stupid husband after rosie was talking to him, and instead of being ****ing intelligent and looking after her, he stays ****ing sleepy and doesnt even bother to wake up properly. so hes half asleep and she doesnt know it and the idiot tells her to stay away from the building she asks why and he says stay away from the building and the fire and so she runs out of the house in terror. He goes out and finds her sat on the step frozen in fear because shes realised shes outside and hates it. so he gets angry because she wont come in because shes basically ****ing paralised with fear. so shes in now, completely wrecked and its got to amy cos she was already in a state over the bastard who raped her repeatedly and the stuff that was going on the other night and now shes stupidly suicidal. its the best miel can do to stop her harming us badly, shes gone on a right si phase and the idiot is still asleep. kats broken down completely and doesnt know what to do. jess is trying to calm lotty and rosie is looking after baby so that leaves muggins here to try and hold the fort.

CrazyHayley 08-06-2010 09:14 PM

sorry Oliver I must have missed it when you said about no prayers, I'd never do anything to intentionally go against peoples wishes or beliefs. Hope youth group went ok.

*Huggles Kat* gosh things sound in an awful pickle for you and alts....no words I'm afraid though.

"til next time wardies!"
*toddles off* (out the door this time though!)

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 09:42 PM

model kitty :P

MammaMia 08-06-2010 10:00 PM

So over today.

Nice kitty Heather :)

risenfromperdition 08-06-2010 10:02 PM

*offers hug*

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 11:21 PM

i hurt i hurt i hurt

*rocks and cries in a corner*

wolfos3d 08-06-2010 11:25 PM

*hugs april*

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 11:25 PM

Why lovely?

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 11:34 PM

updated r/v...

...can't do this anymore.

am so numb.

Kitkat :) 08-06-2010 11:35 PM

*hugs April*

PoisonedApple 08-06-2010 11:40 PM

Oh hunny... *cuddles April*

Scarletdreamer 08-06-2010 11:47 PM

numb numb numb just stay numb

that way it doesn't hurt so much

anarchistl0ve 08-06-2010 11:50 PM

*hugs for everyone* and thanks to everyone who tried to help Ace. He got his sleep not as much as he wanted.

nicole94 09-06-2010 12:09 AM

*curls up and sobs*

MammaMia 09-06-2010 12:16 AM

*cuddles everyone lots and lots*

Nicole, what's wrong lovely? :(
April, off to read your rant thread.

nicole94 09-06-2010 12:23 AM

cuddles helen.
i just dont think i can deal with any of this anymore. its too much. i want to end it. i cant handle family and exams and living. my therapists on holiday and my phone is broken and also confiscated so i cant use phone support. i just dont want to do this anymore
*resumes sobbing*:crying:

xxjuliexx 09-06-2010 12:42 AM

-sits next to nicole- hi...

Scarletdreamer 09-06-2010 12:48 AM

*hides and stays hidden*

:'( can't stay numb, can't do it

xxjuliexx 09-06-2010 12:49 AM

-wanders over to april- april....

frenchhorn 09-06-2010 01:03 AM

*hugs all who wants hugs*

Its ok hayley, I know wouldnt do it intentionally, just thought I should let you know though.

I have just watched the most upsetting and heart breaking film ever (Boys Don't Cry)
I really need something to cheer me up now.

anarchistl0ve 09-06-2010 03:24 AM

*pulls out colouring book and crayons*

risenfromperdition 09-06-2010 05:11 AM

hey sammie =] watcha colouring?

anarchistl0ve 09-06-2010 05:49 AM

Thre fat frogs wif spots

risenfromperdition 09-06-2010 06:18 AM

frogs are cute ^_^
are they green frogs? =]

SoMuchMore 09-06-2010 07:04 AM

*hugs april* oh hun.. i read your thread.. *offers gentle cuddles* Please don't do anything.

*hug helen* you okay?

*hugs becca and heather* how r u guys doing tonight?

*offers cheer up hugs for oliver*

*hugs hayley, mark, nicole, kat, and everyone else i forgot*

I had 2 panic attacks today.. gross.. it was awful. Finally home from work. Will update tomorrow.

nicole94 09-06-2010 07:42 AM


risenfromperdition 09-06-2010 08:08 AM

*hugs laura*
*waves to nicole*

nicole94 09-06-2010 08:15 AM

*looks up and waves, then returns to sitting staring at the wall*

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